No to both for me. You can have a wake and a wedding celebration in a year or 18 months once there’s a vaccine or better treatment. available.
@toledo I’ll add I’m sorry for the death of your brother in law. <3
I will add my sympathies, @toledo .
No to both … for me.
But then, I am not a huge funeral person. I will go to them, but my immediate family doesn’t have them. We do memorial meals with only our very closest relatives (the last one, for my brother, was my two remaining brothers, my SIL, my H, and me). I think if the death was very sudden and very shocking for your S/SIL, I might reconsider. Sometimes the need to comfort wins out. I’d be extremely careful to limit contact to the extent possible, though.
The wedding is easy for me. It would be a no. I have had to miss friends’ kids weddings because I couldn’t get away from work - so missing one because I don’t want to get the 'rona would be no-brainer for me.
However, since I am traveling to see my in laws, I am not one to talk. But it’s only them, they are in very strictly monitored lockdown in assisted living (we can only see them outside, and temperatures will be taken first). We are worried that we may not be able to see FIL alive much longer, though.
I wouldn’t go but I don’t go to funerals even when there isn’t a pandemic. I wouldn’t go to either a wedding or a shower during a pandemic.
No, no, no.
I am sorry for your loss, @toledo. My cousin died of Covid-19 the day after Easter. They streamed the funeral (eventually… there was that delay and backlog at the funeral homes, this was in NYC). I have been uber careful here in my own safe bubble… and was invited to be with some family members soon after to offer support, but just said NO. Call me selfish, but… I don’t want the next family funeral to be mine.
No, nothing indoors. I am wondering why people are holding these events in the first place. Any chance they will change plans or cancel until next year (optimist here, thinking next year might be better).
I’d go, but I’d fly rather than driving 14 hours.
I make no judgments on what others do. Some friends got together for a bunch outside last week. Two friends decided not to attend because they don’t feel safe. Five of us sat outside at a friend’s house, and we did not wear masks. We were staying apart, no hugs, sort of sitting back from the table. I think we all felt safe but had no issue with those who didn’t come making their own decisions.
I do not go shopping just to shop. I wouldn’t go to a concert, even in the park where everyone SAYS they’ll stay on their own blanket, but I’m okay with the funeral or wedding. I think the grocery stores are more risky than a funeral.
No to all of it, for me. I don’t plan to attend any gatherings indoors, possibly through the end of the year. I don’t even see how gathering multiple families for Thanksgiving and Christmas will be safe, and those are the only gatherings I would even consider.
I would not go to either. These are exactly the kinds of situations that result in outbreaks and further spread. Wishing does not make it so.
I would not go. I’ve been into 1 retail store and no restaurants, hotels, rental cars, etc. since March. Longest drive was an hour away and back, with no potty breaks.
We’ve canceled our trips planned for both July and October.
I hear of so many people planning vacations and visits during this time, and quite frankly I can’t decide who’s doing it wrong, but I feel like we will definitely be safer staying home, going into work when required, and limiting all social contact for now.
I do outside activities like walking and riding my bike with family and friends, and would probably feel OK doing a “deck happy hour” or some other outside event with just a FEW people, but that’s about it for me.
Georgia Tech created a county by county risk assessment tool. You need to set the group size, then zoom the map to which county the event is in. The tool lets you know the likelihood of an attendee having coronavirus.
Obviously this is somewhat imprecise. But the baby shower I am not attending this weekend came up at almost 30%. No way.
So, where is the funeral and run the numbers.
I got 10% for the funeral, but have decided not to attend.
My sister is flying to see her D’s new baby in CA and then family friend wants her to stay for family friend’s wedding in nearby area.
Sister and niece really want her to be present for the baby but are ambivalent about the wedding. Lots of MDs are invited to the wedding, including the bride (not sure about groom) and many, many of the guests.
Bride says if my sister and bride’s dad aren’t Flying in from HNL to SF, the couple will likely reschedule, so considerable pressure. Wedding currently set for Oct.
In the past month and a half, I’ve missed two family funerals and two weddings, all of which I would have attended in a “normal” year. Instead, I’ve sent more expensive funeral flowers and more expensive wedding presents than I would have in a “normal” year. I figure if I’m saving all that money on plane tickets, I can cough up a bit more for the flowers and presents.
@HImom I’m not sure what part of the state the wedding is in, but in my area (San Diego) no gatherings are allowed so there can’t be weddings.
It’s the Bay Area. At the moment, the wedding is allowed where the couple have scheduled it.
@momofsenior1, I’m sorry about your dad’s death. I believe you made the right, very hard choice.
@toledo, I am sorry about your brother-in-law.
I would not travel for either type of event.
I wouldn’t go to the funeral or the wedding @toledo
Both events are the type where you want to hug the folks.
If the funeral was in your town, I might say…go to the cemetery for the burial but stay far away. But not with a 14 hour drive.
If the wedding ceremony was out doors and in your town, I might say go just to the ceremony. But again, not with a 14 hour drive.
I’m actually happy that every event we had scheduled for all of 2020 has been cancelled.
Well, the decision to postpone the wedding might be made for them soon. Cases are picking up in SF, unfortuantely.
I was supposed to attend to HNL weddings. The April one was made impossible by quarantine and max of 10 people. The one in Dec is still up in the air.