<p>How would you describe an 18 year old dropping the f-bomb and throwing their racquet in front of the 15 year old? Being a good influence? Role model? </p>
<p>He was being a bad influence. He got caught. He’s embarrassed and is now committed to doing the right thing. Good for him. I’d be horrified that my son was acting that way and pleased with his reaction to the phone call. In no way would I be upset. The only reason I’d call this mom would be to thank her and to add on my own apology that my son had been acting like that.</p>
<p>It really doesn’t “bother me” what the mom did. I will say that some of it is teen behavior they use bad words and I think in some way it’s there way of letting loose and feeling indpendent - I’ve caught snippets of the “language” occasionally with all three of mine and later I’ve told them I don’t appreciate them using that language and I hope to high heaven they never, ever use that language in the presence of anyone other than their friends or on Facebook. I also warn them that language can quickly become habbit and if they let the f-bomb fly too many times they will let it fly in a situation where they wished they had not. As far as tennis, yes, there is a very specific behavior during matches and yes the language can fly on a pick-up game. As a former tennis teacher it galls me to see kids toss and throw the equipment. I’d much rather hear the f-bomb.</p>
<p>I’m with these ^ recent posters. I might not be angry at the other mom. I think I might be embarassed by someone’s need to call and have a talk with me about my kid- or learn that another spoke with my kid about this. I don’t think I would get defensive. Especially not if I already knew that my kids push the line, at times. That said, if she is really a neighborhood problem, you aren’t the only family she’s done this to. And, yes, if your son took a lesson from this, both of you should be proud.</p>
<p>Loving intparent’s post #20. Seconding the nomination of that idea as brilliant.</p>
<p>OP, glad you are feeling able to move on. If she is judging you as a “bad parent”, well… she’s missing the point. Look at how your S responded to the call - only a good parent raised <em>that</em> son :).</p>
<p>Alot of the kids do the whole Eddie Haskell “yes Ma’am” routine around here and then raise hell behind their parents’ back. At least I know what I’ve got!</p>
<p>To the OP, I’m glad you decided not to call back. To call her to have an argument over this is silly. I would not in general call an 18 y.o. or his or her parent (as the other mother did) or even the parent of a minor. My reasoning is based on the fact that even when the kids were very little, and someone’s behavior was possibly injurious to self or others, the mothers around here didn’t listen, didn’t care and were indignant that anyone criticized their precious child. In general I try to myob, unless life or limb is at stake. I am not saying that you have no right to be po’d at her, since that too is none of my business.</p>
<p>However, a word that you may or may not choose to pass on to your son, or other older teenage boys. My HS D was at a sports camp and at the lunch break or whatever, one of the guys was cussing “as if it were the first day he learned…” She viewed that as less than desirable immature behavior, and he actually was diminished in her opinion. Just saying…maybe it is good someone else told him not to cuss so much.</p>
<p>No offense to all the many wonderful home-schooled kids out there, but in this case, I think that may be part of the problem. If he is with his family practically “24-7” then he hasn’t had enough experience around other kids to know that OP’s son’s behavior is not that unusual or shocking. Presumably, he joined the tennis club not only to play the sport but to have some interaction with other kids and gain some social skills. It does not speak well of his situation that he reported back to mom on this fairly common behavior and that the mom feels she needs to further shelter her son from it.</p>
<p>Well, as many have said, you didn’t like the behavior anyway…and someone called him on it. How the mom found out is weird…Perhaps she heard it herself? What kid that age tells mom? Be consoled he isn’t throwing a golf club and swearing on the links aka Tiger Woods and forget about it.</p>