@marilyn do you think the client vs coworker correction you posted changes what one would expect for response ?
Maybe, maybe not. But I prefer accuracy so just wanted to clarify the reported facts so the discussion didn’t shift into something other than what happened. Do you think sending the picture without asking first vs asking if they wanted the picture changes what one would expect for response?
Yes. I think the recipients are more likely to expect a scam from someone trying to engage over multiple emails. If you have a photo of my parent that you think I might want I’d wonder why you didn’t just send it instead of trying to pull me into a conversation.
My online talk radar tells me that the OP had good intent with how much thought she gave to sending the email/picture. I would probably have not given this that much thought. But I say that in a favorable way to the OP - she must be kind and thoughtful! No denying that.
Maybe the pic guys family has been receiving other emails/contacts from people in relation to their “not so good” father. WE DON’T KNOW.
I also have to say that if the guy had been a friend that is another level than that he was a colleague. To me, keeping a picture of a colleague and then reaching out to his family without any knowledge of his family or him the last 25 years (and maybe not even in the short time you knew him distantly) is a stretch in terms of being an ok thing to do to me. If I’m on the other end of that email I would think “this person kept a pic of my family member who they didn’t know outside of business and 25 years later after his death they are reaching out to me? Is there an ulterior motive here?”
But bottom line for OP, I can tell you are a genuine kind person who really meant well.
@abasket - thank you. 
I don’t know the reason I still had the pic., or even if there is a reason - I have a lot of pictures from my past life, many with people I could not even hazard a guess at names. Re: the pic with the deceased, he was not the only person in the group photo (I now realize I did not state in my original post, it was a small group photos), and it’s not as if he were a lover, a boyfriend or even a friend of mine, he was just a man, with whom I was acquainted, in a group photo, at the end of an evening of business.
Actually, I have quite a few things from my past life, and that’s why I was going through my things…to get rid of ‘stuff’ ; just call me ‘Momo Kondo’!
As for the digging I had to do the unearth the kids, I didn’t do any digging; they were named in the obit. as a part of his ‘loving’ family ‘he will be missed by his loving wife xxx and children xxx, xxx, xxx’ ‘he is survived by his loving sibings xxx and xxx and by his many friends’ etc; a quick bit of searching and … voila! From the obit., there is no way I could have gleaned this man was so reviled.
Two days ago, I felt upset; I don’t any longer. A random act of kindness is still a kindness.
That was then, this is now…he’s dead, I’m not and life goes on. Thank you all, again