This could be a test for whether your kids will likely have a higher/same/lower SES (assuming they have grown up and have already made their own living comfortably and you also made a comfortable living in their current age, say, 30 yo – unlike me who likely had only a couple of thousands in the bank and was still in the “surviving mode” and did not dare to have a kid when I was 30 yo.):
For Valentine’s day, how much did you spend when you were their age, and how much did they spend this year? (adjusted for inflation.)
Also, assume that you are not like “mini” who seems to think that spending money because of the V-day is meaningless.
I think that’s a pretty terrible metric, even among people who spend money. There are some people that love to lavish gifts on their SO and some who agree to “no gifts” and it has absolutely nothing to do with their SES.
I think if DS is “unromantic” as me toward SO (e.g., on Valentine’s Day), he would have a hard time in keeping his GF. (I am not kidding.)
One of my younger coworkers (in the $$$ part of California Bay Area) claimed that today’s young women are very “demanding” – I do not know what he meant (hmm…it seems he once mentioned that a young woman today in the metropolitan area wants a guy to spend the time on her and he does not have the time.) But he is relatively very “cheap” even in my standard (but he may not agree at this) so it is not a surprise that he has not got the girlfriend at the ripe age of about 35 yo. Another guy who is in his 40s is still single and it seems he could not find a girlfriend either. Yet another 35-40 guy is also single and has no girlfriend. Isn’t there a gender imbalance in this area or what?! On the other hand, almost all new immigrants (who are Asian indians) in my circle of life got married before the age of 28 or so – with a BIG help from their parents/families just like the help they have received for their higher education expenses, but they seem to be totally fine in accepting this kind of “education/career/marriage helps and arrangement.”)
I am uninterested in knowing whether people actually care when they’re being friendly to me-aka “fake”. I’ll take the displayed friendliness at face value, and what I give them is genuine. But I do think if they care enough to say “I’ve heard that’s good”, then they actually care about what you think of said food. Which is nice, and I am of the opinion that caring about stuff and sharing that with other people is a good thing for the soul.
You have to know how to read the room, though.
There are some cashiers that just want to get your stuff checked out as fast as possible, and there are days I’ll deliberately pick them over the friendlier cashiers because I just don’t have enough mental energy to do the chatty thing. I’m not interested in torturing introverts into talking-almost all of my friends are introverts, and you have to let them have their bubble of serenity and not poke in on it (my husband is also an introvert).
I’d think it’d be hard to be a cashier and be an introvert, though-it’d suck all the energy right out of you, I’d think. My younger daughter (a bigger extrovert than I am) wants to be a cashier at publix next year when she’s old enough.
Makes me wonder whether introverts or extroverts tend to have higher SES levels. Maybe that’s another thread
That metric doesn’t make any sense, Mcat. Some families (us included) simply don’t do anything for Valentines Day because we aren’t into it. You are so obsessed with your son’s romantic life.
How the heck did the thread morph into introverted cashiers, UNIX source code and yet another discussion of Valentine’s Day spending (there is another t bread for that conversation). Can this thread get back to topic?
But we don’t have to try and impress dogs. They love us without reservation. And cats aren’t snobby, they are just a little more…discerning. As long as no one hits him, a dog would love anyone, even Donald Trump.
Back to the OP: I don’t believe our kids will ever make as much money through their salaries as DH has, but both will eclipse my salary by multiples. However, they will have much more than he and I had at a younger age, because they will inherit a fairly significant amount from DH’s mother. Also, they will soon be coming into some money from another source, which I think I may talk about in the how to teach your kid about finances thread. And finally, they will get a boatload when we go. DH has invested our retirement account to an unbelievable result. I don’t think we’ll ever go through all that much of it. Besides travel and health care, what would I spend it on…a purse? Shoes? Not my thing, really.
This whole subject really worries my DH. He wants our Ds to always have enough to be well cared for, their kids’ educations paid for, etc., but he wants them to develop a strong work ethic before that ever happens. To that end, our money will be given to them in trust, and not all at once. They will be able to withdraw only at increments.
I don’t mind if threads go off-topic. But it is tiresome when threads veer off into the same topic by the same poster(s) thread after thread after thread. If you really want to talk about X then make a thread about X. Don’t make a thread about Y so that you can inevitably talk about X.
*Well I do mind if threads go off topic. I know many of you think we (me especially, most likely) are being harsh when we delete a post for going off topic. This is a great example as to why. This has strayed so far from where it is supposed to be it is ridiculous. The OP and others want to talk about SES and the next generations, and this makes it VERY difficult to have a discussion that can be followed. It doesn’t matter that this is the Cafe as opposed to another forum; that just means that the topics of the different threads are far more varied, not that they should just wander aimlessly within a single thread.
I am going to delete a few posts that even got political, I should delete a lot more but just keep it on topic. If you want to talk dogs and cats, start that thread in the Cafe. Any posts off topic again and warnings will be issued. It really isn’t fair to those that start a topic and those that are interested in having a coherent discussion about that topic.*
Thanks for helping keep this thread on track. It is an interesting topic to ponder and one many of us think about at different levels and different times. It seems like something worth exploring.
