Time for a new home?

abasket · July 13

I guess I meant the current people participating. I think if the site is private you can control that a little better - people can only come on board with a referral or something of an older member.

ohiopublic · July 13

We started a breakaway diet/exercise group on Facebook. No overreaching monitors!

wis75 · July 13

Hopefully those in charge of CC will read this thread. Then not shut it down (how dare we criticize) but rather take our complaints more seriously. If not , it must be because today's youth is so different than just a few years ago. I quit using Google News as my home page when they changed formats to the cutesy boxes with pictures instead of an easy to scroll listing. Likewise CC has gone to random boxes of info on a page. Trying to make us read the ads I guess by working content around them in hard to scan, do a fast read. So fragmented. I could go on and on.

Frankly I think they will lose the more intelligent posters in the future because they won't put up with the slowness in getting good information fast as we could in the past.

Midwest67 · July 13

I’m open to moving to a new board.

I did it once, when a large group of us from the AOL discussion boards moved to a private board.

It was really nice while it lasted (years!).

It began to fizzle out because it got somewhat claustrophobic. There was no influx of new members and there was a bit of familiarity-breeds-contempt going on after awhile.

Also, Facebook. When FB got big with parents, many of the board members preferred to interact with each other on that platform instead.

conmama · July 13

@abasket, there is a form of bullying that goes on here. It’s more of a constant contrariness whenever I’ve posted, by the same person in the past. It actually became funny, but not really. It seems to have lessened in the past few months, as I started to ignore them. It was noticed by others and they PM’ed me. I’ve seen it happen to other people, too, sort of being ganged up on if they have an opposing view. People can get a bit hateful. So, that is concerning if boards aren’t monitored.

austinmshauri · July 13

I don't agree with limiting a new site to only college educated people. I don't think a degree is required for intelligent conversation.

abasket · July 13

Well bottom line is that the decisions will be largely made by whoever decides to go forward with a new spot. Rules or no rules, heavy monitoring or light, private or public, etc. I mean you can try and poll your potential members on what they'd like but you can't please everyone - or most everyone - on all components of a message board.
Take for instance the whole idea of whether to have a group on Facebook or "no Facebook". (I'm not suggesting or expressing a choice strongly myself). Some have said "no Facebook". But truth probably is, that Facebook is one of the easiest, most convenient spots to set up a group. I'll bet there are several FB groups that have existed and thrived from CC members over the years.

A message board is a job. Yet I doubt that no one is really looking for the "job" of monitoring a group 24/7. So looking for a perfect venue...probably won't happen.

lookingforward · July 13

@abasket and others
You may remember I love a good protest. I'm all for people voting with their feet, when necessary, making the right noise and following through. I also had the idea of a sick out, a day when we stand behind our words and away from CC. (Not something, btw, that I think can be effectively broadcast.)

But tomorrrow is Bastille Day and I do not see a plan in this exit. With respect, I think it's not fully formed and we run the risk of following in this update's footprints: change that might make initial sense to some, but isn't surveyed, weighed, and planned to meet a viable number of needs, be, itself, viable.

Not a naysayer. But as I tell some kids, "miles to go." If it's worth doing, it's worth doing right.

fireflyscout · July 13

I'm open to a new location, but will probably keep reading/posting here too.

abasket · July 13

@lookingforward my point was that no land is the perfect land - and sometimes no amount of screaming makes anyone listen. This may not be perfect but finding another "perfect" place won't happen. Nor will it probably materialize with the same feeling as we've enjoyed.

If we have learned anything from being here for years that it takes all kinds to make CC go around. So one can want a firm plan, another is shy to try any plan and a third jumps at any plan.

And Happy Bastille day tomorrow! I have French heritage and lots of French family and have always loved the day!

lookingforward · July 13

Originally, I thought Bastille Day would be great for a stay-away fom CC. Laden with meaning (more or less, maybe less.)

Right, abasket, if one aspect of action is planning it right, the companion side is, "Just Do it."

I'm just sensitive to the variance in wants. Some want the Parent Cafe (all PC/all the time.) Some want format control. Some are for the exclusivity, some want new blood.
You get my point.

I can't believe how much Iliked the Instapot thread, btw, seeing as I don't own one and have no intention to purchase. And so many of us do use PM to roll our eyes, smack our heads, and vent with buddies. Lol.

lilmom · July 13

Include me in the move. I just got back from vacation to this new format. I don't like it at all.

CTTC · July 14

@lookingforward I posted the idea of a strike for CC, also. I thought it would be great if the mods and forum champions also sat CC out for a few days. But it went nowhere. It would have been interesting!

CTTC · July 14

@conmama

there is a form of bullying that goes on here. It’s more of a constant contrariness whenever I’ve posted, by the same person in the past.

I agree. And it's not just you. I've noticed that a few posters really dislike each other, and that when one of them posts in one forum something that the other doesn't like, there will be a challenging comment from the other, and then they are off to an argument. It's as if the latter poster is stalking the former.

I've also noticed attempts at thread control by someone other than a moderator. Kind of akin to the "thread valedictorian" competitions that sometimes take place. The person who starts a thread doesn't get to dictate the direction the thread takes, and doesn't get to control whether or not the other posts belong in the thread.

Creekland · July 14

I suppose that's one way to know I don't read nearly as much as the rest of y'all. Apparently I've missed quite a bit.

I'm still not sure if I'm going to stay at all or try to find a decent travel forum. My lads are out of college with the exception of two more years of med school for one (if that counts). I'm on the computer what seems like 23/7 right now sitting with my mom and I can only handle this forum for short spurts anymore. I try for a new thread or two each time, but then I move back to games which are also getting very boring TBH, but are easier to handle than this format. Hospice tells us mom is in her last hours - today is Day 2 of their 2-3 more days estimate. Once that's done the "work" will start. Otherwise, right now I'm even unsure if I'm going to head back to school in the fall or just start wandering more around the world, backpacking style. If H's dad also passes away (very likely in the next couple of months anyway) we really don't have much holding us "here" any longer post estate settlements. We may just start working on that 1000 Places to See Before We Die (given 25 more traveling years, that's 40 per year or a little over 3 per month). A travel forum could be a better spot for my time.

MaineLonghorn · July 14

I think the two biggest challenges would be:
1. Moderation. You may think you know how much CC moderators do, but you don't! It's a big job. Even long-time users can cause problems.
2. Becoming in-grown. Inevitably, some people will become disgruntled and leave the group (it's happened every time I've been involved in a a "break off" group). The group gets smaller and discussion decreases.

Bastille Day is my birthday, and my oldest son's.

Singersmom07 · July 14

I think I would miss the long standing threads that I go back to all of the time and the moderation. I do appreciate how much moderators do since other places I have been do not have such faithful ones all of the time. I am adjusting to the new format and I also bookmark the cafe so I don’t go through the main page. Also I come here so often the browser remembers the cafe page.

abasket · July 14

Happy Birthday @MaineLonghorn to you and your son!!! Do you share the day when you're together?

Well I've never thought this place was perfect by any means nor the people! I'm sure I'm not perfect here either - I like a debate, I don't always love when a thread I start takes on a life of it's own, there has been "name calling" (where are my "hardcore" fitness friends?) and there are definitely posters that often drive me up a wall.

But there are many posters I enjoy, many threads I enjoy, probably threads I have thrown off course, etc. All the pros and cons of an active board I believe. And likely things you'll have other places/spaces.

skieurope · July 14

I've also noticed attempts at thread control by someone other than a moderator.

As an FYI, that is not allowed. All members in good standing are allowed to post on any thread, in an forum. No regular user, including the OP, can dictate who may/may not post and/or what they can/cannot say. When I see this, I set the user straight. If there are instances where a mod has not yet intervened, it's because we have not seen it. So feel free to flag.

Creekland · July 14

@MaineLonghorn Happy Birthday! May you have many more happy laps around the sun - you and your son too, of course.

Otherwise, I don't think anyone is upset with CC in general. I know I'm not. It's merely the new hard to read and get around format. If others like it, more power to them. We all have our likes and dislikes. Had this been the format on here back when I first stumbled upon the site y'all would have never known my internet name. Those who stumble on it and don't mind it can replace us.

With regards to a "move," I know personally I just need to figure out how much time I'll be spending online when my life returns to a new normal and where I want to spend it. I've enjoyed my time here and gleaning from the shared wealth of knowledge, but there can be good fellowshipping elsewhere too I suspect. I don't know for sure because I am rather picky at not wanting much in politics or bad language (why I'm not on FB), but I'm also just as happy chatting with the IRL humans we meet on our travels (and at home).

Time for a new home?

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