We found a highly recommended seamstress that’s nearby and does hemming of gowns. I think we are hemming. D is happy I found a place that is recommended (and fairly reasonable). We can go tomorrow and they can do it in a few days.
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Any suggestions for inexpensive, compact flats D could bring to change into, after ceremony? The dressy high heeled shoes aren’t comfortable for prolonged wearing.
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I like Vivala flats (Margot style). I’m sure there are less expensive ones out there but they work for me.
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Thanks—other suggestions? I’m collecting info for D.
Some options for foldable flats.
We had these at my D’s wedding. Pretty sure you can purchase a single pair.
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Thanks — so many good possibilities.
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Our venue sent us several templates with different layouts for tables. DD chose the table layout first. Then I used sticky notes with each guest name to move them around on that template…sending DD screen shots of what I thought. She would make suggestions, and I would change…rinse and repeat until satisfied.
DD was not here where the wedding was happening so I was the person on the ground, so to speak.
Lots to consider beside where the wedding party sits.
We had family members who couldn’t be seated together. We had people we knew wanted to sit together. Things like that.
It’s not just where the wedding party sits.
We were at three weddings this year and all were terrific. In at least two, wherever the bridal party was seated, a spouse of that bridal party member was also seated.
In one case, we were seated with the MOB and FOB which was a surprise, but they are long time friends. In another case, we were seated with our neighbors who all were invited (two tables actually adjacent), and the third, we were seated with some of the nicest and most interesting people we have ever met.
And in all cases, there was a lot of moving around once the meal ended.
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Both of my girls consulted me on seating. I didn’t change them a lot, but I did have input.
Both of them had another dress to change into for dancing instead of wearing their wedding dresses.
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We split up the seating arrangement responsibility at D’s wedding – I handled seating for my friends and family, D’s in-laws handled seating for their friends and family, and D & SIL handled seating for their friends and a few cousins around their age. Then D, SIL, and I organized the placement of the tables within the venue. It worked out pretty easily. D &SIL opted for a sweetheart table.
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Do your generous friends know she prefers no gifts? If not maybe let them know so they can adjust the plans for the shower or make it a smaller more intimate group or whatever.
I think if only invite to the shower those who will also be invited to the wedding - unless there are some people who you know can’t for some reason attend the wedding (I know you split time between two locations) and this would be a nice opportunity for them to celebrate with your daughter
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Oh I agree that there is lots to consider besides where the wedding party sits. Seating choices are sooo difficult. Personally I think you have to think of everyone who is coming and it will flow from there whether the idea of all bridesmaids & groomsmen sitting at a head table is a good idea or not. It might work great or might be a real uh-oh moment.
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My daughters used a program or app for doing seating charts instead of paper and post-it notes. Easy to change around and share and print. They both had sweetheart tables - said it was because they had been at a long table in front before as an attendants and wanted their attendants to have a better social dining experience. Another advantage of the sweetheart table - they could easily get up from their seats to move around during courses or greet guests at their little table. Both times flowers from the ceremony were used to decorate the sweetheart table and the floor in front of it.
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D is opting to not have the wedding party sit together. They all have plus 1’s and they range from childhood friends, college teammates, current colleagues and brothers and sisters. They will sit with their plus 1’s and their friend group. Bride and groom’s table will be them and both set of parents. We have a real good relationship with our future IL. The ladies have gone on “girls’ vacations” together and I have played golf with SIL and FIL, so we will have a convivial table. We have also had numerous meal together. Our initial meeting was a brunch – I think meals are a good way to break the ice.
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Son/DIL had a sweetheart table for their 2023 reception, though at the time I didn’t know about the term for it (just learned it here in prior posts). It worked out pretty well. I think our daughter officially sat with the bridesmaids, but she spent a lot of time visiting us and relatives at our table…. both my kids made sure that grandparent had plenty of attention, made me proud.
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S & DIL spent time with pretty much all the guests and made them feel very good about having attended—the welcome reception, the wedding & reception & the brunch the morning after.
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D and SIL found a great mix between dancing with friends and being sure they spent time with all of the wedding guests. It is a pet peeve of mine, but I think the bride and groom should spend a few minutes with all guest – fortunately the kids felt the same way. They also had a friends-only after party right at the venue which gave them more time to socialize with friends.
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If she has a long dress, she should remember that it will drag more when she switches to flats. Comfy wedges will not be as compact as flats but may work better.
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She’s getting it hemmed and likely will sit most of the evening as her stamina is very limited. We aren’t too worried about the dress dragging and she likely will donate it after wearing it as sage green is not a color she normally wears (even though she DOES look very nice in the gown).
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If anything I learned, the couple does not want nor care what anyone thinks unless they are specifically asked.
Unless you know of a disastrous seating arrangement, the best advice I received was to just say “that sounds great”, or say nothing….especially the MOG. I was fortunate to be asked where we wanted to sit and which of my guests sat with who. We opted to be sat with her parents and that’s what happened.
I just reread this and didn’t mean it towards you, @1214mom . Hit the wrong reply button.
It’s their wedding, not mine. That was my mantra. More than feeling I had to voice my opinion, was the need to know I was getting off on the very best foot with my DIL and her family.
I never even expressed opinions to my son, because I didn’t want to take the chance it would be repeated and not taken well.
Now, saying all this, the only unsolicited advice that didn’t or wouldn’t have bothered me as a Bride, was from my mother.
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We felt our role was just be supportive if the couple in whatever ways we could. Loan a car—sure! Make reservations? Where & for how many people? Here are some menus for you to consider. Make a deposit? Sure—to whom and for how much? Print files? Sure on what?
Buy booze from Costco? Sure. Which ones & how many? Returned unused booze? No problem.
It turned out just the way the couple wanted it and they were happy. Since they were happy, we were happy. We didn’t get to talk to MOB much because she came with a group of 20 but perhaps in the future.
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