Advice needed: Parents not letting me go OOS to attend Penn. [$4k, versus UCLA $8k]

Of course. The parents and student can decide either way. If it weren’t for the Penn offer, it isn’t as if I’d be saying, “Don’t go to UCLA - you can’t afford it.”

But the way the original post was phrased didn’t make clear to me whether there was a full understanding, on the part of both the student and the parent, of how big the cost difference truly is. TBH, I’m not even sure if my interpretation is correct. (Not even 100% sure that the quoted UCLA cost isn’t based on commuting, in which case it’s probably not accounting for the associated costs of commuting. Many unknowns here.) But if it’s the case that the parents are thinking of this as merely a 4K/year cash-flow difference, when it’s really 4K/year plus 27K in total debt, that will be on the student to repay (plus the other perks like free laptop, internship funding, and so on)… it’s important that they understand the full impact of what they’re deciding.

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If the actual FA is similar to the NPCs for a student with low income parents living in on-campus housing ($3.5k Penn, $9k UCLA), then they account for expected student work (at both) and student loan (at UCLA) to cover those amounts (both NPCs list $0 parent contribution). So the difference based on stated cost of attendance is $4-5k. Put it another way, both expect the student to work and contribute some of the earnings, while UCLA also expects the student to take the federal direct loan.

However, actual cost differences may vary. For example, Penn does list a higher travel cost than UCLA in the student budget, but the difference in actual travel cost from southern California may be greater than that difference.

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Note: I should’ve mentioned this when I first posted but these are all estimated costs from the NPC and the award letters aren’t arriving until mid to late April.

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For UCLA you should have a provisional award letter already? Is there a delay related to the FAFSA this year? Aid Notifications | UCLA Financial Aid and Scholarships

Yes, there was an update to FAFSA which caused a whole setback and delay to the award letters. It’s quite bothersome because the only one I received some sort of award letter from was NYU (only because it used the CSS profile to calculate) while I have to wait later on for the rest.

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I haven’t contacted FGLI but I have emailed the admissions office to see if they have some sort of travel grant I could use to see the campus.

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Yes that is indeed quite bothersome.

Now that I looked in more places, I’m seeing this on UCLA’s main FA page

Prospective student aid offers are not expected to be released until late April to early May 2024

And this article saying UPenn may not release FA package until May 1. Penn's financial aid office says applicants will not be impacted by FAFSA delay | The Daily Pennsylvanian

The spokesperson said that every student who submits the required CSS Profile, Penn Outside Resource Form, and federal tax returns by the required deadlines will receive a financial aid package by May 1.

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Have you checked your portal? There should be an invitation for you&1 parent there.

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Just checked. Unfortunately there doesn’t seem to be an invite to travel to campus. :frowning:

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Odd if they would be as a CSS school and whatever documents they request, they should have all the info they need.

Plus, if they wait til May 1, they’re going to lose students that made decisions prior.

That’s a bummer for any student as we know aid often comes back with a different # than the NPCs show and someone will be caught thinking they were going, only to learn they can’t afford it.

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Yes. And although the UCs extended the decision deadline to May 15 because of these FAFSA delays, UPenn’s deadline is still May 1.

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Yeah that’s what I find odd. Other schools should’ve extended their deadlines in light of these fafsa changes.

Well, worst-case, if you’re genuinely undecided at the end of April, you can commit to Penn, and then you’d have until the extended deadline to switch and commit to UCLA. This is allowed; you can’t commit to two schools at once, but you can pull out of one and commit to the other. Certainly don’t commit to UCLA before you have the full financial picture.

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Good plan, and it also looks like Penn doesn’t require an enrollment deposit, so the student shouldn’t lose anything if they do switch to UCLA after seeing all the information.

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^ good plan

One should pop up :crossed_fingers::heart::hugs:

Your parents are scared. I completely understand why, but at some stage they will need to decouple from you, whether now, or when you get a job in 4 years. So the question is, how can you assuage their fears?
–Are there family or friends who live near enough to UPenn that could help you if needed?
–Does your counselor know other adults that would say check up on you if you got sick or got a concussion playing sports etc?
–Is there another kid from your school going to UPenn? Perhaps knowing their family would help?
–Are there any local meet-ups sponsored by UPenn where you could meet other local students?
–What if you agree to face time them every night before bed? Text them at night etc?
– Is there an office at UPenn that works with other first gen students who can advise you? Your situation doesn’t sound unique for first gen honestly.
– agree with earlier posters that your parents may be more responsive to other adults input. Do you have a pastor they are close with that would speak on your behalf?

If you are the first person in your family going to college your parents likely don’t understand that even when you are at a school close by, you’re not home anymore. You build a life there. Sure you can come home on a weekend, but overtime you generally want that less and less. Unless they want you to live at home while you attend UCLA?

I’m sorry that this is a difficult time for you. Congrats on these acceptances! It is a big deal that you got into these amazing schools. I hope your parents are really very proud of you and understand how exceptional you are to gain acceptance into these schools.

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As second generation immigrant, I understand op’s situation. I don’t think this is cost issue. Besides worrying about op’s safety going so far away for college, their parents also worry about living in US without their children arround to help. Who will help them to translate goverment doc? Who will take them to see doctor if they don’t feel well? Many years ago, I was accepted to UC Davis. My parents thought it was too far away from Bay Area. I end up went to Cal State Hayward (now East Bay). Therefore now, l encourage S24 to go OOS as long as i can affort the cost.

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Not necessarily true. My kid is getting a science major in CAS and an Engineering major in seas. She has not had any large lecture stem classes at Penn. One had 80 or so. Most have been far less.

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A little off topic, but you might enjoy Good Chemistry.

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It may also be cultural depending on where OP family is from, and particularly if OP is female.

Also, the parents might not fully grasp that OP will still come home for winter and summer break.

I hope we get updates on this situ!

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