<p>GMom - Another way of explaining to the relatives is that Mica girl decided MICA wasn’t really the school for her, and she’s exploring other options, but is sensitive about it, so please not bring it up.</p>
<p>BTW, D feels for MICA girl, knows how very hard it is. Gives her kudos for trying.</p>
<p>I think if we arent going to call her MICA girl we should call her BraveGirl.</p>
<p>RedBug’s D: Switters, I agree!</p>
<p>First of all LOVED the “when does the cat die” comment, thanks for the good laugh. Having a mother who grew up on a farm and didn’t see pets as pets particularly and never bonded with any of our cats or dogs I totally get the animals outside only attitude. My farm grandparents never let any of their dogs or cats in the house but my mother relented which I appreciate now, it must have been kind of difficult for her but she did it for the kids I guess.</p>
<p>As for MICAgirl life is about trying to see where you fit and if you don’t occasionally stumble you aren’t trying enough different things is my feeling. </p>
<p>I would definitely just tell people that the school wasn’t right for her and she wants to rethink what she’s going to do. And that’s how she should present it to people when asked. And actually I think that’s sort of what it is about, if it had been the right fit (at the time) she wouldn’t have stumbled which doesn’t mean she might want to give it another try later on. </p>
<p>The key here is for her to be able to see this as a “try” that didn’t work out and not a “failure”. Otherwise trying someplace out might seem way too overwhelming and frightening. I think it’s important to not have a fear of failure which we all do carry around a bit, but those who can get past that are those who succeed and fly. </p>
<p>Of course it’s important too to figure out why she might have stumbled and work out those issues a bit but boy I think all anyone else even in the family needs to hear is that it just wasn’t the place for her and she’s going to try something else. It’s actually a pretty factual response.</p>
<p>Gmom, tell her not to give up
Johnny loves art
<a href=“http://www.artdaily.org/index.asp?int_sec=2&int_new=43606[/url]”>http://www.artdaily.org/index.asp?int_sec=2&int_new=43606</a></p>
<p>Well…we are enjoying the break from school. CMU-son is doing intensive physical therapy for both ankles and knees. He has to explain to everyone how, in one semester, he could be so accident prone. Ironically, I have now joined him at the therapy center…I had a tetanus shot go bad (seems like dr. hit a nerve–note to all…only let a nurse or physician’s assistant do a vaccination) a few weeks ago and now my shoulder is locked. I am hoping it is just temporary pain/weakness/joint stiffness but funny how I am now going to same PT as son. Thank god for prendisone I am almost pain free.</p>
<p>I now realize that we got off easy with just a few physical issues this first semester. Mica girl should know that she would not be alone amongst S’s friends. Quite a few are struggling after one semester…even the high school val is in trouble at his school. Two close friends have come home for good after the one semester…others are going back to try to dig out of an academic hole. S’s roommate is on probation for an issue in one class. A very close friend at McGIll is bombing classes in her intended major. It is brutal out there…I think you don’t hear about how many kids struggle at college until your own goes through it. You get the impression that it is easy for so many but I think the reality is that it is easy for just a blessed few and all the rest have a hard to really really hard adjustment.</p>
<p>S is doing more sketching and work on his own than he did in HS but is still keeping weird hours. I have trouble getting him up to join us for lunch. He is out again tonight…so many friends, so little time apparently.</p>
<p>D is on the same schedule - so hard to get up in the morning. Has been relegating her time to family in from out of town, boyfriend and us, and so far everything is pretty balanced. Hard to get her up when we’re doing something in the morning tho! Says she now know why they say don’t take a semester off, makes hard to go back and leave a significant other behind. They are arranging tea time together via Skype as a de-stresser, which should work until she needs to pull an all-nighter. For Christmas she gave us school projects - me a pop-up book she did for 2D and H a framed black and white painting. Great stuff!!</p>
<p>She also knows several kids who are hanging on by a thread - BraveMicaGirl has nothing to be ashamed about.</p>
<p>It is nice to know all of you here and so many posts in this thread encouraged me!
Happy New Year to everyone!
Good to have D home, after half year courage life, D is more mature:
Not that picking on my cooking :–)
Help taking shopping bags since mom is old in her mind …</p>
<p>We have a half price book store here, that is D’s favorite place, so far she got 15 books from there. Last night I asked her how many she finished and it is 8. Some fiction some nonfiction. She hang out with friends several times, it is all in day time in the mall, having lunch together and shopping. </p>
<p>Ask her about next semester class,
reply: don’t worry is all settled and can not go further with her</p>
<p>Ask her about her grade:
reply:don’t know yet, don’t worry, Cooper is strange, they will send grade out someday …</p>
<p>It seems like she is not lonely in school, start get to know some of her classmates. One time she asked me why girls are always more needy regarding friends? and Continue: telling me she is not a needy person and her roommate comment on her saying she is the most cool, chill person in the dorm. Don’t know this is good or bad, but that is her.</p>
<p>Happy New Year again to everyone!</p>
<p>OK mom
now, you go list in the “bookthread” what that coasting-thru-with-ease cooper girl is reading, all those 8 books.
I mean, please?</p>
<p>will try after I got home, not sure if she told me the detail of what it is, I have to sneak into</p>
<p>no, don’t sneak
something tells me you are not good at that, hun.
ask her, she’d tell you, no?</p>
<p>My girls are enjoying a lot of junk-food reading over the break. D1 with her cowboy romance novels, D2 with her fan-fiction continuations of Pride and Prejudice. Good junk, like an ice cream sundae rather than an unwilling stop at Taco Bell…</p>
<p>loveblue- my S doesnt know his grades yet either, except in one class that didnt go so well, completely messed up final project. </p>
<p>Its great to have him home. mostly been socializing with same crew of boys he always hangs with, some of which he sees in NYC too. He’s known a couple of them since 1st grade. Its nice to see how they turn out. Even the ones I thought werent the best influences have turned out really well. Thank God everyone grows up eventually. New Years eve was in our basement, while my H and I went to a party somewhere else. Turned out fine, they stayed up all night talking and drinking a little snuck-from-dads-stash-beer. I asked my S how come they didnt run out of things to talk about, and he said, “these are my closest friends, how could we run out of things to talk about”. Made me wish I were a fly on the wall.</p>
<p>Happy new Year everyone…</p>
<p>Switters & loveblue - great stories! My girls are having many old classmates over for a pot luck today and they’ve known several of them since 1st grade also. I love all those kids so much, it will be great to have them all over here!</p>
<p>We had a good time visiting relatives in California. Jet lag and teenagers is not a good mix. Trying to get Manga girl and Aspie girl to finish their homework. Manga girl went to see the Magic Flute at the Lincoln Center last night with a good friend of hers from manga class – but now she’s sick. She is the most capable of the bunch of them at managing the gf diet on her own, but sometimes she gets tripped up, especially at restaurants. D1 spent many, many hours in bed in California, not too inclined to do much of anything. H and I have been monitoring her medication but don’t see much sign of improvement. Yesterday, though, she did express some interest in the upcoming trip to China and today she almost seemed enthusiastic. Hard to tell. I’m trying to keep my expectations low. She did ask for the “China Survival Guide” that was in my Xmas stocking and also for the itinerary for our tour – so those are positive things. I know she was looking at pictures on the internet. We have to go to Baltimore on Friday to clear out her things from the dorm – so I suppose that will be kind of depressing. She’ll need to go with us though, we can’t do it on our own. We have been avoiding pressing her about any further plans. I told her I want her to take some classes either at Student Art League in NYC or at the Katonah art center or Garrison Art Center – but she needs to do something (keeping in mind that she’ll miss some time with the travel, but that’s okay, this isn’t for college credit or anything, just to keep her skills up). I will be talking with Aspie girl’s social worker this evening about possibilities for developing D1’s interpersonal skills and increasing her self confidence. I hope she has some good tricks up her sleeve. In the end, though, it’s up to D1 to recognize what she needs to do to conquer her ADD/depression/other issues. Other people can only do so much.
Here’s to a much better 2011! 2010 sucked.</p>
<p>Yes…goodbye 2010. Best wishes to all for the coming year. </p>
<p>Surprisingly, the kids spent new year’s eve with us out at a farm/vacation home owned by friends up in the mountains. Games and movies and a group dinner but we all crashed at 12:30. S had worked hours and hours on a birthday video for our friends’ daughter who has autism. It was a big hit…he had photoshopped her into pictures with all of her favorite characters–big bird, horton, thomas the tank engine, etc. and my daughter and the girl’s sister had scanned pictures and sent him music. It was really really nice collaborative effort and nice to see all those artistic talents benefiting friends. Now he needs to work on finishing his incomplete…serious procrastination. The I has to be changed by the first week of the semester or it turns into an F. </p>
<p>Despite the lovely new year celebration (IMHO) , D keeps talking about how much fun other kids had…while she didn’t even have PHONE RECEPTION! at the farm…can you imagine? couldn’t send texts at midnight to wish everyone a happy new year. Tragedy jane…is slowly getting over this terrible way to ring out the new year. Even worse, she postponed the cleaning and is currently doing bathrooms and vacuuming…to be finished off with the rest of the required reading of 1984 tonight…not the best way to spend your last night of winter break. She wants me to read to her but I have a rat phobia from spending too many nights on farms in Ecuador.
Give me snakes and spiders but I don’t think I could bear to read the last part of that book…</p>
<p>Welcome to 2011! D spent New Years eve and day at her boyfriends house. BF’s mom’s SO gave all the kids in the family gift cards for Andretti Park, where they have go-carts, video games, etc. , so they went there on Sunday and had a great time. She finally came last night and is supposed to go fishing with H today, if he can wake her up - he heard her still up at 5 am, skyping, I imagine. She has spent several days with her GF’s, altho one went out of town for the whole Christmas break and only got to see her for a short time. GF’s school started today, so she’ll still have this week to see her before D flies back to Minn on Friday. Visit has been short, but good, she split her time between BF, friends, and family, so no one was left out.</p>
<p>let me in let me play!! huff huff bow bow
his middle school friend calls after looong time no hear, I congratulate and dig how’s so and so college he’d been ( of course I can not pronounce the name right so try State&town ref. to get him understand what I meant) no, that one they could not afford in the end he did not go (gawk, that’s where my kid said he was) then in fact he squeezed into other better conservatory program where he is at now. great. just great.
the kid introduced mine to all things good and bad, there were one point I questioned the “influence” thing.
switters, I’m with you. they are all great, I am glad stuck with it and fed them boys over years.
you should be very proud that they prefer your basement for their own home. you done your part.
fammom so that’s where you are!!! loved that unplugged life story of your princess.
so some school starts early, some allows kids back early?
I talked to local Cooper mommy and told that they KICKED OUT kids form dorm till 4th.
I say, it is generous enuff if they’d let them back days before the semester starts. I feel for out-town, out-country students, thou. Is this NYC or Cooper thing? would your school let kids stay if they had to for breaks?
It might be our issue if that ever happens.
really, getting in is just a start. all these things need planning, money, effort and love, endless unconditional care.
how amazing we(parents - let me in! let me play!!) all are!!</p>
<p>BandD…keep feeding the old friends so they come back for more and are long term contacts for your son. Our basement is often the site of late night snacks and movies. We moved too many times so most of S’s friends are from high school only. He has seen a lot of them and reestablished the links too. I do my part by sending care packages to some of his friends–particularly the ones who have parents abroad. D sells girl scout cookies each January so I will stock up again and fill the freezer. Then, I can send thin mints and trefoils to these kids during the year…instant love and loyalty…</p>
<p>CMU keeps one or two dorms open over break so kids have to move from their usual dorm during the 3 weeks. I don’t know how that works with other kids stuff there. They have so many international kids (China, India, Korea, etc.) who can’t afford to go home at break so they accomodate them in some apartment or dorm type arrangement…the cafeterias are closed except for some of the cafe/snack places and I believe they help them organize a potluck type meal for christmas and new years since everything is closed those days.</p>
<p>D1 and I drove into NYC this morning to visit the Chinese consulate and apply for our visas (i am taking D1 to Hong Kong with me (I have a business trip there) and then we will do a six day tour of a lovely part of mainland China – Guilin to Yangshou). The deal is that D1 is supposed to go do the second trip (pick up visas and pay) to NYC on her own. We had a good talk on the drive down. She says she really wants to return to MICA in the Fall. I told her that I was willing to entertain that idea but that she had a lot of work to do to prove that she will really be able to handle it. Her meds are being adjusted, so hopefully that will help with her lack of motivation and general lethargy. We have several things we’d like her to try – but she’s balking at most of it, saying she’s going to ‘think about it’. </p>
<p>Aspie girl’s birthday is tomorrow (17 already!) so there’s a lot to do around the house. Maybe D1 will see herself clear to bake Aspie girl’s birthday cake. Lots of sniffles/coughs/sneezes in my house right now though. sigh.</p>