<p>I have a dilemma. Well more like a situation. I’m 17 & majority of my friends drink, smoke, & get high. I dont though. The first time I drank alcohol I immediately spit it out b/c I didn’t like the burning sensation in my throat. So besides that first sip, I don’t drink. The first time I ever smoked, I literally choked & I reallly hated the “taste” of smoke in my throat. Just gross. So I don’t smoke. And as for pot, I think mj smells disgustinggg. Although many of my friends do this, I respect their decision to do what they want with their body.</p>
<p>But it’s annoying when one of my friends in particular constantly asks me to smoke a blunt with her when she knows I don’t do that stuff. What ****es me though is that she says “my life is depressing” b/c I’m a “goody-goody” & “such a square” since I won’t do any of that stuff. My decisions to restrain myself from such hedonistic things is personal b/c I honestly don’t like the idea of not having any self-control, & getting high & appearing stupid(even if it’s temporary) is unappealing to me. Sometimes she won’t even hang out with me cause I won’t smoke with her. (she would rather hang out with my LITTLE sister b/c at least she’s easily influenced!!) I’m stubborn & I hate being pressured to do things I don’t want to do. I don’t care if my views make me unpopular, even if majority of my peers drink/smoke.</p>
<p>But tell me: can my stubborness to dissent from peer pressure potentially ruin my social life in my near college future?? I mean I’m a pretty social person & nice & make friends easily, otherwise. ((does anyone feel like ppl don’t take your friendship seriously b/c you dissent from the majority? And somehow it might be screwing up your social life?)) and am I doing the right thing by keeping my individuality? I’m not gonna do something just b/c a lot of people are doing it, esp if I don’t like it myself.</p>
<p>Yes, you’re doing the right thing. Once you get to college, you’ll be able to find your group of friends that fit your social lifestyle perfectly.</p>
<p>Besides, not being reliant on drugs or alcohol doesn’t make you “depressing,” a “goody goody,” or “a square.” The AP Psych teacher at my school gave an awesome lesson in our Health class the other day, and he says the psychological motive behind doing drugs and alcohol is weakness.</p>
<p>Definitely not. Don’t ever do something that you are not comfortable with. Your friend is clearly not respecting your wishes and I’m concerned for you (and your sister!!). I’m glad that you haven’t given in to the pressure. I’m going into college this fall as well and have similar values to you. I’ve met lots of others already who think the same way. You’ll find others too! I would not want to be around others who try to constantly question my sense of self and personal integrity. Those who are your real friends will admire and respect your assertiveness.</p>
While I agree dead people often have an odor, and Michael Jackson probably has the plastic surgery stink coupled with it, it’s relatively simple to close the grave and leave him in peace.
Also your title is very misleading, I thought you were talking about donning a helmet and wheelchair to make a point about society. I’ve changed the title for you. I’m a pathetic sap who needs people on the internet to listen to and help me with my problems.</p>
<p>Guess what smart guy, OP was using the dictionary definition of “■■■■■■.” It’s a verb, and it means “to hold back.”</p>
<p>Anyway, Determined you are by no means doing something wrong or socially imprudent. I don’t actually know that many people who smoke, and of those who do, there are even future who would pressure someone else to do so. In college, I suspect you will have ease finding people who don’t smoke (although finding those who don’t drink at all might be a bit more challenging). Most of the people I know don’t smoke, and we’re all going to college! The problem is your friends, not you. (I am rather worried about your little sister, however. If she’s easily influenced, don’t let her hang out with someone who’s gonna turn her into a pothead!)</p>
<p>Nope. (: I have friends who smoke, and guess what? I’ve never smoked and I’m still friends with them. So it’s def. possible to have a social life that doesn’t include drugs (:</p>
<p>Well I know I’ll always have friends who will smoke pot or drink. Even if it’s just one. I just hope ppl don’t look at me as a “good girl” b/c it’s ssooo annoying.</p>
<p>You’re a girl you’re not socially expected to be doing those things therefore you’re fine. And yes, you’d be looked at as a good girl unless you have casual sex. But, what’s wrong with being a “good” girl? Why exactly do you hate it? Accept who you are (a “good” girl).</p>
<p>Your unconscious could have just tricked you into believing you hate MJ due to it’s smell, cigarette due to it’s taste and alcohol due to the burning sensation because of your good girl persona.</p>
<p>Emotion always has its roots in the unconscious and manifests itself in the body. - Irene Claremont</p>
<p>I have been in a similar boat as you recently, and many of my “friends” have been spending much less time with me due to my choice to abstain from substance abuse. My friends have at least been more respectful then yours, but I know how you feel. What has helped me a lot is the group of friends I made last year at HOBY (a summer leadership camp). Most of them are more like me, and we facebook and get together at state events etc. My point being, no you are not killing your self socially. You can find friends who will support you by surrounding yourself with more high achieving and morally strong individuals. This can happen in summer camps etc. and should not be too hard to do once you get to college. Most Universities have all types and you can be a part of whatever scene you choose. Anyway, you are making the right choice, and you can always come here for pseudo-support if your friends and family are less then supportive.</p>
<p>Yes, give in to peer pressure, that’s why it’s there.
If you don’t try drugs now, you might end up trying them at an inappropriate time in your life. Drugs are like chicken pox. Do it now, get it over with, don’t worry about it later :)</p>
<p>^ That’s the thing about drugs. Barring peer pressure/looking cool, they have very little appeal or benefit until your body has become accustomed to them… and then it’s only because you’ve become accustomed to them.</p>
<p>My daughter recently interviewed for a college internship that required security clearance. She passed easily because she doesn’t party – and they did ask questions about it (asked her and other people they interviewed about her). So you never know when it might come back to bite you.</p>
<p>Sounds like you don’t have very good friends. I would just stop hanging out with them and find people who don’t judge you for what you do and do not inhale/drink.</p>
<p>Xenophanes, yess that just might be true. But I also have personal reasons for not doing all those things. Like they’re bad for your health (smoking=bad lungs, alcohol=ruined liver, etc.), & I’m kind of a health freak in a way. And about the “good girl” thing, I feel like they equate it with boring. But the way I see it, there’s a ton of ways you can have fun sober.</p>
You’ll thank yourself. Good luck!</p>