<p>I think this is more of a YMMV depending on time period and campus culture…but yes…parents tend to over exaggerate actions/behaviors they don’t approve of.</p>
<p>At my LAC in the '90s, hookups were somewhat common…but contrary to some assertions here…they weren’t worse than dating in terms of negative drama or bitterness. </p>
<p>Certainly not any worse than accounts of dating I’ve heard from older cousins and classmates. Plenty of negative drama/bitterness in dating…especially if individuals involved have issues in the areas I cited in my previous comment here.</p>
<p>Curious about those who found a first significant other (let’s say, arbitrarily, relationship lasted at least 6 months) after college was over - how did they meet? Internet? Work? Laundromat? Yentas among family or friends?</p>
<p>I met H playing league volleyball, organized by the Jaycees. He was the only single man on my team. We’ve been happily married now for 26 years. My sister met her H by being “set up” by her sister with her VP. They’ve been happily married now for about 3-4 years. My sister met her H through friends after she graduated from college–they’re going on 20 years of marriage now. My younger brother met his wife in HS but they didn’t start dating until both were in colleges 2500 miles apart.</p>
<p>Just learned that a very long-lost friend from my teenage years (NOT a late-bloomer herself) met her husband on the subway. They’ve lasted about 30 years so far. I’ve had some similarly wonderful and serendipitous strokes of luck in my own life, and hope for a few more for my girls.</p>
<p>I did not have a ‘serious’ boyfriend until my mid-twenties although I dated if you can call it that for years. Met my husband at 28 and we were married at 30. He had a couple relationships before I met him but no marriages. I’m grateful that my boys have only dated casually. My 23 year oldest boy is no where near “ready for marriage.”</p>
<p>I’ve heard nowadays, even the attractive girls/guys are using match.com. It was a surprise to me but D1 has a friend still in college and met her new boyfriend through match.com</p>
<p>Glad this thread resurfaced, because I have some good news to report – my 23-year-old daughter has a boyfriend! (Finally!)</p>
<p>We just learned this recently, and since she lives far from us who knows if we’ll ever meet him if it doesn’t last long. But I did pry his name from her, and confirmed he’s on Facebook, and told her I intended to “stalk” him there – not that there’s much to learn.</p>
<p>Anyway, that’s one less thing I can complain about.</p>
<p>several of my friends’ kids got married courtesty of online sites. One, an investment banker, met his wife on jdate. I don’t know which sites the others used.</p>
<p>fireandrain - D1 was shy about telling me her first boyfriend’s name, but with few clicks on the internet, I got his name, picture, father’s name, father’s employer, home address, home value. She told me that it wasn’t cool, but since then she has been very transparent.</p>
<p>The worm and his s/o have been visiting here all week. Both in mid twenties, and worm’s first serious relationship. I would be happy if it was his last;she is just terrific. They met thru a MIT online site. After first date he was smitten.</p>
<p>Sme have to be very focused to achieve, so they are not allowed themselves to be involved up to certain point. D. said that some people are not even involved in her Med. School, she calls them “intense”, they are listenning to lectures audio while exercising in gym!! Forget dating… D. needs her down time, relax. She said that it works for them as well as her own way is working for her. Everybody is different. I do not see any point of worrying, just let them do what is the best for them, they know better</p>
<p>Our rule was no one on one dating until 16, but looks like we didn’t have to bother because our college freshman just went on his first date (she’s just a friend, Mom!) (well they went out to a nice dinner alone!) and our 16 yr. old daughter says all the boys in her school are geeks so…We’re not pushing the dating thing at all…sometimes I think its more of a distraction than anything else, drama, etc. I was well into my 20’s before I had my first BF so I guess they get it from me. Been married happily for 20 years so not sure the whole “practice makes perfect” in my case, anyway, is the case!</p>
<p>My 17yo S was talking to me about match.com last night. I think he was fishing for an opinion that online dating isn’t just for 'losers". He’s a big time late bloomer. He has interest in dating but absolutely no game whatsoever. He’s resigned to the fact that he won’t start dating until some time in college and having other options for meeting people besides the bar/club scene makes him feel better about his prospects.</p>
<p>When my ex and I broke up, he put up a bunch of those online dating ads. I found out from the corner gas station worker (I guess she goes on there, too, and wanted to “warn” me- she didn’t realize we had broken up). From friends, I found out that he had absolutely no replies lol. </p>
<p>My sister and her group of friends find people at work (they’re in their mid-20s). Albeit, they work at a bar…</p>
<p>I met my H at 1AM on a street corner in Manhattan. We will celebrate our 25 th Anniversary in two weeks.
My S met his 2 post-college gf’s through work. He tried in college but I think the girls did not like his overly romantic ways: making dinners for them, organizing cool dates, etc.
D and her first serious bf have been dating since early freshman year and they are now juniors. I have no idea how that one will end up. I can’t see them marrying after college though.</p>
<p>Judging by some recent comments…people have widely varying perspectives on what constitutes being a “late bloomer” in dating. Some feel 16 is the minimum…others feel 17 is late.</p>
<p>IME…noticed those in the latter camp tend to come from rural areas…especially from the midwest/south and/or extremely religious. </p>
<p>Moreover…most of my HS classmates’ parents would be livid if they found their kids were dating in high school…especially considering risks to their kids’ college/career futures, being stuck with an immature S/D-in law, and/or the possibility of being an early grandparent. Common refrain from them was…wait until you’re in college/working.</p>