<p>Not quite the same, but my SS card has my first, middle, and married name. About 20 years ago, I started using my maiden name as my middle. It is now on my driver’s license, passport, and professional license. It is very useful for dealing with the care of my parents as I start to exercise my power of attorney. I get many less questions and less hassle with my middle name the same as their last. So I like the idea of changing your middle name to your maiden name. It will make it easier to drop the last name if/when you see fit. </p>
<p>I worked with doctor who got married years ago and went by her married name- for some weird reason when they moved to another state- she forgot to change her original license to her married name and she then had to go by her maiden name on her new state license. It was quite the change for her but I think there would have been a long lag time to practice in the new state if she did not go by the maiden name.</p>
<p>In Quebec the law requires married women to keep their maiden names. Makes life simpler.</p>
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<p>Spouses’ names</p>
<p>Both spouses keep their birth names after marriage and continue to exercise their civil rights under that name, i.e. they must use their birth name in contracts, on credit cards, on their driver’s licence, etc.</p>
<p>This rule applies to all spouses domiciled in Québec, even if they were married outside Québec.</p>
<p>However, women married before April 2, 1981 who were already using their husband’s surname before that date may continue to exercise their civil rights under their married name.</p>
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<p>nrdsb4 - If I change one word here (Hispanic to Italian), I have the exact same story. My supposedly “easy” married name is not.</p>
<p>That 's why in most countries, women don’t change their legal names.</p>
<p>To the question of what I did with my original middle name- I just dropped it. I had no emotional connection to it and it was one of the most common middle names ever among my generation in our area. I don’t miss it at all :)</p>
<p>I tried hyphenating my long last name with DHs the semester after we married. Not enough bubbles on the computer cards…
One of my young friends has parents who hyphenated their names when they married. Kids were given the hyphenated last name. Long, multicultural and hard to spell. The kids hated it. Hated it. Every single time they enrolled in anything, won anything, were on any list or program more often than not that 21 letter last name was butchered. My friend took to just using mom’s last name (second half of the hyphen) socially but has to deal with the huge name with things like airline tickets.
Her older sister married recently. At the reception someone asked Bride if she was changing her name (new hubby has short simple name, although ethnically different than bride) . Bride smiled and said “You better believe I am” </p>
<p>My mother kept my father’s name when they divorced after almost 25 years. If she were to change back to her maiden name it would be a hassle. It became her middle name once she was married, and has been on everything since. I actually feel kind of bad for her about the loss of her middle name, which was my grandmother’s first name.
As her child, I don’t think it would bother me. I associate her side of the family very strongly with my grandfather’s last name, so it doesn’t sound at all unfamiliar to me. Her older sister, my aunt, married late in life, so she used her maiden name professionally and still, for the most part, goes by it, though legally it’s been changed.
Nonetheless, it’s my strong belief that our last name is more fun than my mother’s maiden name. Our last name is less common and a bit more difficult. Americans tend to pronounce it in a pseudo-French way that is not how actual French people say it. It has two capitals, and that’s usually messed up, or a space is put before the capital letter, even though that’s not right. None of these mistakes ever happen with my mother’s maiden name, but where’s the fun in that?</p>
<p>I don’t get why some of you are talking about the “loss” of a middle name. If your name was Firstname Middle Maiden, and you decide for whatever reason to go by Firstname Maiden Married, your middle name doesn’t go away - you’re just not using it. How are you still not Firstname (Middle) Maiden Married?</p>
<p>I mean, I go by Firstname Married, but I still have a middle name - it didn’t disappear just because I’m not ordinarily using it. </p>
<p>I’m a guy but I have the 4 name thing going … originally a middle name and then added my wife’s name as a second middle name. There are some issues with forms that do not allow for two middle names.</p>
<p>But like I said, I go by Firstname Married. On my passport it shows Firstname Middlename Married. I get for travel purposes I need to keep to that when booking flights, but if tomorrow I started calling myself Firstname Maiden Married (in other words, using my maiden name as my middle name instead), who or what would stop me? </p>
<p>To make it clearer, suppose I was Susan Marie Smith and married Bob Jones. </p>
<p>I go by Susan Jones, maybe Susan Marie Jones every now and then. </p>
<p>Suppose I decide I want to be known as Susan Smith Jones. </p>
<p>A) I didn’t “lose” Marie, I just am not using it in the moment (just like I didn’t use it when I went by Susan Jones)</p>
<p>and B) since I’m not hyphenating to create a new last name, what stops me from going from Susan Marie Jones to Susan Smith Jones? </p>
<p>“Marie” no longer appears on my passport, drivers license or social security card so, other than on my birth certificate, it is gone legally. All of those documents now say “Firstname Maidenname Marriedname”</p>
<p>I do have a friend who is recently engaged who kept her original married name after her divorce. She has a PhD, is published, etc. using her married name. She doesn’t really want to change it but her fiance is bristling a bit at her keeping her ex-husband’s name after they are married. She’s not sure what to do, but knows that professionally, she’ll have to keep using her first married name. </p>
<p>Why doesn’t your friend use her new husband’s name socially? Introduce herself as Mrs. Newhusbandname. If you are known professionally with one name for over 20+ years, it is very hard to change.</p>
<p>She probably will. Her social and professional circles are pretty closely tied. Reality is, people will still call her by her current name- she has kids in high school, etc. He’s going to have to accept that, I think. </p>
<p>As long as she loves him, that’s what matters.</p>
<p>I’ve decided to leave it for now, though I did ask my attorney if I could get some kind of legal permission to change it in the future, without having to go back to the court and ask again. </p>
<p>Ask your lawyer, but I am pretty sure if you don’t change it now, you’ll need to go through the process as everyone else who wants to change name, which isn’t that hard. Your lawyer would just file a petition on your behalf, you’ll take out an ad to make sure no one has any objections in you changing your name, after a period of time if no one objects, your request would then be granted.</p>
<p>Custom in India was for the wife to keep her first name, change to her husband’s first name as her middle name and change to his last name. Talk about loss of identity!</p>
<p>All children, of both genders, traditionally get their father’s first name as their middle name. We did NOT follow that custom. I was willing to use H’s name for son’s middle name but he preferred a different Indian middle name that tied into family first names. I had insisted on an American first name. We persuaded an immigrant relative of his to give their child a middle name- they were just going to drop the customary middle name- telling them most Americans have 3 names and it would be easier for their children.</p>
<p>I’m sure most men don’t give names a thought since they do not face losing theirs with marriage. It does affect one’s sense of identity. If H had had a very short last name I would have changed mine to it, I get tired of spelling mine (twice or more). </p>
<p>My grandmother kept my grandfather’s name when they divorced. She remarried, took her husband’s name, and then when they divorced she went back to her first husband’s name- which was the name of all of her kids and grandkids as she only had sons. </p>
<p>My mom kept her name when she married her first husband and my dad. She didn’t change it until she had me and just decided it would be easier to change to our relatively common (but always misspelled) Irish name rather than keep her short but incredibly hard to spell/pronounce Hungarian name. I don’t think she’d ever switch back to her maiden name as she’s been Suzie O’Irish for almost half of her life. She does express regrets about changing it though. </p>
<p>Though I’m getting married before I’m really an established professional but the idea of changing my name has never been a serious thought. I love my O’Irish last name, it’s the name my parents gave me and it’s who I am. Just not worth the hassle IMO. </p>
<p>A friend with a three syllable last name married a man who also had a three syllable last name . They combined their names to make a third name. ( the first part of one & last of the other)</p>