<p>Scherzo,</p>
<p>Glad to see that your bouncing back. Best wishes to you! I hope you continue staying in touch.</p>
<p>Oh drat, I wasn’t on the list! :p</p>
<p>Scherzo…go look up Globalist on the UVA threads. He’s a more recent grad than some of us “oldtimers.” </p>
<p>And lefthand…I DID meet the love of my life at UVA. :)</p>
<p>
For someone your age, possibly the worst thing about applying to college is telling people where you DIDN’T get in. 
</p>
<p>But, I’ve got about 30 years of experience on you, Scherzo, breaking news to family members and friends. I’ve been fired from a job, had a business fail, and for some reason, neither one of my kids will get a driver’s license, (due to questionable parenting, I’m sure)! 
</p>
<p>You are not disappointing anyone. It’s just sharing whatever is going on in your life with the people who truly care about you. UVA and W & M are fine, fine choices. The next good news you will be telling your family and friends is where you will go. Believe me, everyone will be thrilled with your decision! And, CONGRATS, GRAD! You made it. :)</p>
<p>Pull up Evil Robot’s threads. He got into Yale but decided on Vanderbilt - and is THRILLED to be there. Point is, non-Ivy, but excellent, schools can be amazing. </p>
<p>In six months, you’re going to be having the time of your life. I promise. Said it before last year - no one believed me - then the 08-ers IMed and emailed to say that I was right, they are sooo very happy with their decisions, so thrilled to be where they are. </p>
<p>I suspect you are from VA, because those are the state schools that everyone applies to. Go outside of VA, and getting in is a HUGE accomplishment. UVA and W&M have the status outside of VA that the UCal schools and UMich have.</p>
<p>
Yes, aries - they are on the list of what are called the “Public Ivies” around here.</p>
<p>
Scherzo–</p>
<p>I came late to this thread, and am relieved to see you starting to bounce back, at least somewhat, from this disappointment. You’ve obviously been envisioning this moment for a long time, and I’m sorry that you didn’t get to experience this particular joy. But as hard as it may be to believe, it would have been just a moment; and not nearly as important a moment as you might think. The only people who would ultimately value you more for going to Harvard than to the truly wonderful UVA are are too shallow to be worth bothering about.</p>
<p>Oddly enough, you’re right that life is made up of small, joyful moments; but the really important ones–like meeting the love of your life, as lefthandofdog wisely points out–don’t have anything to do with status. I realize that you have dedicated immense time and energy toward achieving a particular goal; but hard as it may be to see it now, those efforts will pay off in other ways–particularly since (unlike some less fortunate kids in this forum) you do have some excellent acceptances in hand.</p>
<p>Again, I am glad to see you rebounding a little, but I hope you feel you can talk to someone about this experience–if not your parents or grandfather, then some other adult whom you like and trust and who can help you see what really matters. Both in the short and the long term, a rewarding life depends more upon learning to value your own efforts and achievements than it does upon racking up trophy moments–whether Ivy acceptances or fancy jobs and cars.</p>
<br>
<br>
<p>So true, Marite–</p>
<p>Just finished reading the Andi thread. That was sobering! What is that old saw about complaining that you don’t have shoes until you meet someone who has no feet? A definitely must read for any student who got into some great schools, just not the great schools he wanted.</p>
<p>Another must read is the thread started by TheDad last fall about how kids who didn’t get into their first choice/EA/ED school are enjoying their freshman year at their alternate choice schools. Almost all kids were pleased as punch with how their lives turned out. I hope OP will be able to feel the same way next fall.</p>
<p>Excellent points, Marite and Ellemenope–and here’s a link to TheDad’s terrific thread about outcomes after first-choice rejections last year: <a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/showthread.php?t=15378&highlight=outcomes+EA%2FED+rejection[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/showthread.php?t=15378&highlight=outcomes+EA%2FED+rejection</a>.</p>
<p>Scherzo - Don’t worry about what your mom and dad and family and friends think. They are just hoping you are OK. They are mad at the outcome and want to punch someone who could maybe have caused this. But they don’t think one bit less of you. You are still the kid who did study so hard, who did deserve to apply to those schools. And they love you and still proud of you. </p>
<p>They want you to have a happy life. And, from CA, UVa has huge prestige. State schools have some great features. My D, who had luck of the draw and some legacy stuff on her side, did get some HYPS acceptances. And guess what, she may still go to Berkeley.</p>
<p>Buddy, it will be OK.</p>
<p>To emphasize what has already been said: You have two enviable and wonderful options in UVa and William and Mary, and a good one in Va Tech as well. You seem to be in-state Virginia so may not be aware of how incredibly difficult it is to get into UVa from out of state and how strong that app pool is–you will be surrounded by bright and varied people from all over the country as well as from Virginia in Charlottesville. And Charlottesville itself is a great college town as well as very livable and appealing for non-college students.</p>
<p>You are also in very good company when you write about your dismay over not getting into your Ivy choices. Both from the CC boards and from hearing what friends’ children experienced this year, I know that countless seemingly ideal applicants are going to be headed to colleges other than the ones they originally dreamed of–and in most cases, they still have fine choices, as you do. </p>
<p>My younger child graduated from HS last year and was waitlisted at five schools, four of which had been her favorites. She ended up getting in to one of them off the waitlist, but by that time had visited and really liked an equally excellent school that had originally been a bit lower on her list simply becae it was less familiar to us. She chose to attend that school rather than the slightly better-known school whose waitlist she had been on. I don’t think she has looked back on that decision with any regret. Late March and early April were a painful time for her pride last year, but it has worked out well, maybe even for the best. I think that is what happens to most people. I hope you are continuing to feel better. You may feel unlucky at the moment, but truly, you are very fortunate, with a great deal to look forward to. Have a wonderful time in college!</p>
<p>Shoot for the moon and you end up among the stars.
Your grandpa feels bad cuz you feel bad. I am really sorry.</p>
<p>scherzo - trust us ‘more experienced’ ones on this - the only people who will care that you did not attend Harvard will be Harvard alum…and they will care even if you had graduated from Yale!</p>
<p>You will soon step out on the most amazing journey through these next few years - you will do well at any of your fine school options…and maybe more importantly, you will make friends you will think of as ‘family’ for the rest of your life. Wishing you a wonderful ride…</p>
<p>
I’ve probably read this post 20 times now, and it still makes me cry happy-tears every time. What a wise lesson for us all: college is NOT just an academic experience, it is a life experience. We do well not to lose sight of that.</p>
<p>Life is what happens while you’re busy making other plans. You’ve got a wonderful future ahead of you, Scherzo: reach for it with both hands and an excited heart and open mind!</p>
<p>baby, life is unfair, but you did not slack off in h.s—the b–chy colleges
do that sometimes and reject good students. But you can go to UVA or
whatever on your list and then transfer.
Don’t be suicidal, it’s not your fault. I’d undersand it if you didn’t do anything
in h.s and now you’re sorry, but you had all the credetials, but the schools
f-d you over.</p>
<p>i saw this maxim at a p2pforum:“None of us remains a virgin. Life screws us all!”</p>
<p>My husband had the time of his life at UVa. Many of his closest bosom friends are UVa people, and he graduated over 30 years ago and we live in Ca. </p>
<p>On another board right now is a kid struggling to choose between Dartmouth & W&M… </p>
<p>You did GREAT JOB – the trifecta!-- and deserve to feel immense pride. These schools can stand toe to toe with any school.</p>
<p>Pick the school that’s most calling out to you… Go have fun and get a great education. :)</p>
<p>scherzo, take a look at this column that’s appeared in the Boston Globe for 16 years now - it’s as true today as it was then:</p>
<p><a href=“http://www.boston.com/news/globe/editorial_opinion/oped/articles/2005/04/05/the_college_rejection_letter/[/url]”>http://www.boston.com/news/globe/editorial_opinion/oped/articles/2005/04/05/the_college_rejection_letter/</a></p>
<p>Good luck at whichever school you choose!</p>
<p>the hammerspake,</p>
<p>“do i make sense?> man,i am too drunk”</p>
<p>No you don’t, and yes you are.</p>
<p>Scherzo: don’t worry about friends and family, they just want you to be happy, don’t let them down.</p>
<p>Lefthand: what a beautiful post.</p>
<p>By this point it is obvious that you weren’t suicidal - or that if you were, it has since passed, which is important.</p>
<p>That being said, I’d like to share a story that didn’t end so happily. Last fall, a girl that I didn’t know auditioned for some colleges in our state during an overnight theater competition. The day the results were posted, she found out that she had not been “called back” for any of the colleges to which she had applied and auditioned.</p>
<p>That evening, she hung herself in a bathroom at the hotel.</p>
<p>I can’t express in words the shock and sorrow that news brought to the hundreds of students involved in the competition. Kids who didn’t know the school the girl went to much less her name spent the night huddled in dark hotel rooms literally crying themselves to sleep.</p>
<p>I don’t know if it was the proximity, the familiarity, or something entirely different that made the event hit home so hard for so many people - but it was like losing one of our own.</p>
<p>Look, we all put ourselves out there every day. Sometimes we get a victory march and sometimes we get kicked to the curb. Hard. </p>
<p>But please, never forget that for every crushing defeat there will be a glorious victory. Hope doesn’t count for anything until you’re at the literal bottom of the barrel. Life is too beautiful and too filled with potential for us to judge when it should end. I don’t care if you believe in God or gods or nothing at all, there’s still always something left to do and something left to hope for.</p>
<p>The only problem is that when somebody kills themselves, it’s only the friends and the family and the passer-byes who stand to learn that lesson. </p>
<p>You never know where this curve ball will lead. The next years could be rough, the next month could be rough, the next day could be rough. Life’s improvements are both magical and subtle, while the defeats are abrupt and forceful. At some point, you will be laughing and living and not even thinking about these dark days - and when that happens, you won’t even realize that you’ve moved on.</p>
<p>And absolute faith in that fact is what should give you the hope to keep going no matter how awful the news may be be it from colleges or some other tragedy we cant even foresee.</p>