This graveyard looks overcrowded. People must be dying to get in.
3 Likes
Where do polar bears keep their money?
In a snowbank.
3 Likes
What do mermaids use to wash their fins?
Tide.
5 Likes
You can tuna piano but you can’t piano a tuna.
1 Like
Today at the bank, an old lady asked me to check her balance… So I pushed her over.
9 Likes
You can tuna piano but you can’t tuna fish.
4 Likes
Wife told me I can be a real idiot sometimes.
I thanked her for giving me permission.
1 Like
How many storm troopers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, because they are all on the dark side.
4 Likes
Apologies if this is a repeat:
How many optometrists does it take to change a lightbulb?
One…or two? One…or two?
8 Likes
How many psychologists does it take to change a lightbulb? Only one, but the lightbulb has to really want to change.
3 Likes
What do you call a snowman with a six-pack? An abdominal snowman!
5 Likes
If two vegetarians get in an argument, is it still called beef?
3 Likes
My dream job is to clean mirrors, because I can really see myself doing that.
4 Likes
I only know 25 letters of the alphabet — I just don’t know y.
4 Likes
Where do pirates get their hooks?
Second hand stores.
8 Likes
Why don’t eggs tell jokes?
They’d crack each other up.
5 Likes
I send a lot of these jokes out on the family group text. Ds2 guessed “Pirates Rrrrrrrrr Us.” lol
1 Like