<p>Rockymtnhigh, have you taken away her car keys? A sternly worded message is not going to take a little kid back out of his coffin, if she is still driving and kills someone.</p>
<p>You can try to get your parent privately tested. Tell them if they can indeed still drive the test will confirm it. We had my father (96) tested last year. He passed except for night driving. So now he doesn’t drive at night. </p>
<p>[Professional</a> Assessment | SeniorDriving.AAA.com](<a href=“http://seniordriving.aaa.com/evaluate-your-driving-ability/professional-assessment]Professional”>http://seniordriving.aaa.com/evaluate-your-driving-ability/professional-assessment)</p>
<p>Update: “good news”: The Uncle knows that his business will make all his dreams come true. He will no longer “need” our assistance. In fact he told me to return the clothes that I just purchased for him aren’t what he needs anymore. The Uncle is going to Zegna and Brioni to find what he needs for his new life. Or his reclaimed life. </p>
<p>The car situation is clear to everyone: I am handling it. He is evidently cleared to drive…by the dmv. He rents cars (no I don’t know what agency he goes to) and drives. Because he is so hard of hearing all of my communication with him is via email. I emailed him with the information that we will NOT loan him any money. For anything. </p>
<p>Oh…he is refusing to attend a party this weekend. And it is “my” fault. Yep, my fault. He did say that I am making a huge mistake because I won’t support his business. And he won’t be sharing to the naysayers. Is there/was there an emotional debt? Probably. I did not have a Come to …moment. I remember him from my childhood…not so good.</p>
<p>I am afraid to ask…but can you say what his new “business” is? And why it requires that he wear Zegna and Brioni?</p>
<p>I am assuming his credit or debit card will be declined…Even though his fantasy life is obviously very rich.</p>
<p>and that will be your fault too. Just as well he is not attending the party–he would probably resent not being the guest of honor. </p>
<p>The hard part watching people grow that old is that we really love them, even though they aggravate us to death.</p>
<p>The business involves “trading platforms” with the minimum buy in of a half of a billion dollars. The profit margin is huge ($3,000 for every dollar invested. And that is every month. </p>
<p>And…I strongly suspect that his “people” would be a bit upset with everyone if something went wrong. I was offered a small investment opportunity, but gosh darn no.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>And you didn’t invest in this sterling opportunity? Amazing. I bet you also inexplicably turn down those chances to get the $15 million from the Iraqi prince who left in in some bank account and all we need is $10,000 from you to get it out.</p>
<p>Apologies, but it sounds like this elder statesman has dementia. His judgment is impaired, memory poor, problem-solving unreasonable and behavior irascible (worse than it already was). Its not worth tying to rationalize irrational behavior. Best to get adult protective services involved. If he really is “renting” cars, how is he paying? Writing bad checks?</p>
<p>Of course I invested…and he has always been a narcissist. This is the behavior that I remember. I don’t look well in orange…if one calls it tamarind…I am ok. (Did I mention that my uncle tried to convince me that we shouldn’t pay taxes?)…he didn’t…I was polite…but I did mention that Mr. Ellebud is an attorney. He would lose his license to practice? But…considering I will have 45 million dollars we would never have to work.</p>
<p>Except the mandated work…like making license plates.</p>
<p>He has always been a narcissist. He’s now a narcissist with dementia.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>If he no longer owns an insured car it is imperative that he buys liability insurance when he rents a car.</p>
<p>bevhills, just so I’m sure… this whole trading platforms/minimum buy in/half a billion dollars thing – is pure fantasy, right? I’ve assumed he’s penniless or he wouldn’t be looking to you to buy him a car.</p>
<p>LasMa: No, the scheme is not fantasy. It exists. The programs are designed to give some money to 3rd world nations in exchange for…the countries being fiscally grateful? I understand this at one level, but I really don’t fully grasp the context. I know that this is a favorite of Arab and China wealth. mr. Ellebud and I read the “official” explanation as offered by…Credit Suisse…I believe.</p>
<p>Oh, yes he is penniless. But this is something that he discovered many years ago, when he had money. At that time the buy in much less…but he did have some success. But this is a fantasy…now. He will never have the money, time or the cache to do this. I very strongly suspect that there is some…laundering going on…But maybe not.</p>
<p>Where does this uncle live now? </p>
<p>I would agree with others…this fellow should not be driving. Personally, I think you need to do everything you can to prevent him driving. </p>
<p>If you can get his license revoked, he won’t be able to rent a car. I’m not sure how you would go about doing this.</p>
<p>Is this uncle really capable,of handling all of his own affairs? If not, and he really is incompetent, you could consider an involuntary conservatorship. Believe me, this is NOT fun to do…but if it is necessary to prevent someone from doing harm to themselves or others…and to deal with everyday things…then it might be necessary.</p>
<p>I just read this wonderful article posted in another thread about elder drivers. <a href=“Should Doctors Stop Patients From Driving? - The New York Times”>Should Doctors Stop Patients From Driving? - The New York Times;
Here’s what I don’t understand. CA is a state where doctors must report unsafe drivers. So how is it that your uncle’s doctor has certified his fitness to drive? Have you informed his doctor about your uncle’s accidents and near-accidents?</p>
<p>We just rented a car from Avis and there was fine print about qualifications one must meet to rent a car if one is over 75…</p>
<p>Credit Suisse is under investigation by Germany, USA & Brazil.
Its not legitimate, free money never is.
They even have " for dummies" books explaining why!
[Amazon.com:</a> The Iraqi Dinar Scam: Why Buying the Dinar is for Dummies eBook: John Jagerson: Kindle Store](<a href=“http://www.amazon.com/The-Iraqi-Dinar-Scam-ebook/dp/B007Z9DFN8]Amazon.com:”>http://www.amazon.com/The-Iraqi-Dinar-Scam-ebook/dp/B007Z9DFN8)</p>
<p>CTTC, my dad’s doctor (not in CA) said that she couldn’t determine whether he was safe to drive or not, since she’d never seen him drive! Evidently that’s the loophole a doctor can use if he/she doesn’t want to be the one to take the keys away. I suppose they don’t want to be the bad guy, any more than the adult kids do.</p>
<p>She did finally refer us to an OT program which tested not driving per se, but the skills involved in driving – reaction time, memory, ability to process multiple inputs, physical skills like agility and reflexes, etc.</p>
<p>Bevhills - my dad has relatives like this. Full of nonsense and pull emotional strings. You just have to wash your hands of it entirely.</p>
<p>Couldn’t bevhills contact the doctor and provide evidence of the uncle’s previous accidents, statements from the neighbors, etc. to present to the doctor? CA is one of the states where doctors are mandated reporters, so there is presumably a higher level of expectation. The name of the doctor is on the paperwork.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Bevhills - why do you care what this man says, in the least? He’s full of it. He was a jerk to you when you were in a precarious medical situation. He doesn’t “care” for you in any way whatsoever. Why are you participating in this drama? Why are you even talking to him?</p>