I am surprised @oldmom . Are you saying that it would have been less painful for you to lose one of your children in early childhood than it would have been for his/her birth mother?
My sister and BIL adopted 2 children as infants and I know they couldn’t possibly love them any more if they were their bio-children and if anyone (including the bio mothers who gave them up) had tried to take them away, they would have fought in every possible way to keep them. Had they lost either of them as babies they would have grieved for the rest of their lives.
While of course it would have been unbelievably painful to me, the (unknown–my daughter was abandoned) birthmother of my daughter likely did suffer for losing her.
While adoption was a huge gift to me in every way, I always remember that there was great loss for me to have received this gift and although my daughter is a fabulous young woman, there have been and will continue to be effects on her caused by the fact that for whatever reason, her original family was unable or unwilling to raise her. I can’t deny that.
But I don’t think this a good place to discuss the relative rights of birth and adoptive parents and the affects of adoption on adoptees.
I do think that you are severely underestimating what Edith would have had to do to keep the baby by going far far away and giving up everyone and everything including her family, social status and means of support, condemning herself and her child to living a lie.
@oldmom4896, I have two adopted sons and very much see your point. I also agree that in no way is this somewhere where I will discuss this any further. There has been a lot of trauma for all involved in our situation due to many factors.
Does Marigold know Edith is her mother? Well, everyone will know after whats-his-name tells his mom and she blabs it all over. Perhaps Edith can write a letter to the advice column to find out what to do.
I’m sure Spratt can help her.
It can be soapy but I think it will make it more interesting if Bertie doesn’t come back. Instead of both daughters happily married, one married and cares for the estate while the other has a successful career in magazine. Wouldn’t that add more dimension to the story?
I think Edith should tell her, sooner rather than later. This kind of stuff always, always comes out, and it’s best that Marigold hear it from Edith early on rather than from Mary as a teenager. And no, I wouldn’t put it past Mary to tell her.
Marquess. Then Edith gets to be the marchioness, and outrank everyone else.
I was under the impression that Marigold’s Swiss situation was one in which she was not adopted, but someone was being paid to care for her, which is why Edith was able to quickly terminate the arrangement.
The Drews family definitely got the short end of the stick in all of this, although it worked out nicely for Daisy’s FIL.
