<p>I struggle with this problem. S1 came and went for a few years–college, state police academy, etc. Each time he left it was difficult, but he was always coming back. He finally gave his long-term gf a ring and got an apartment. Now I know it’s for good. I know it’s time, I’m happy he’s doing well and achieving goals…but it’s still difficult. </p>
<p>I went and bought 4 baby turkeys. Don’t really recommend this route—now I have 3 teenage turkeys…dog took care of one. The fiance is lovely. Her mother is out of the picture and she includes me in stuff like wedding and house buying decisions. I am SO grateful. Her communication is lots better than son’s!</p>
<p>S2 has been launched for a few years.</p>
<p>D16 is still at home, but has her license and is very involved in ECs. I’m sure it will be difficult all over again. My house is far too big and H will never downsize. I’ve kept very busy cleaning 15 years of their junk and have some big (roof, gutter, painting) projects on-going. Now we’ve decided to sell one of our rentals, so that should take care of some more free time.</p>
<p>Were you all communicative with your parents while your kids were growing up?</p>
<p>Just curious. My mom talks to her mom almost every day to this day, and all three generations live within 20 minutes of each other. So, I’d really look like a jerk if I didn’t keep in touch with mom. I’m repeating the behavior that was modeled for me, I guess.</p>
<p>I would be thrilled to have S successfully launched! He didn’t graduate in May–and thanks to failing a prerequisite class, he won’t be able to take his final class until spring 2014. He also has to have an internship to graduate, but has been in no hurry to even apply for one. :eek: We’re not paying his living expenses after July, so he’d better figure something out.</p>
<p>Meanwhile, he doesn’t respond to email or voicemail. The only way I know he’s still alive is by checking his Facebook page to see the last time he played Words With Friends.</p>
<p>I’ve had to focus all of my mothering on my fuzzy baby, the guinea pig…</p>
<p>Yes, it can be hard to watch them grow up and become independent. But trust me… it’s harder to watch them fail at college and retreat home - been there, done that.</p>
<p>Happy Birthday jym. I have these feelings and it was very acute last year when I had one of those milestone birthdays. I’ll come back tomorrow and post more but wanted to wish you a very happy birthday.</p>
<p>Happy Birthday! After being away from son and daughter-in-law for a while, I now live and work in the same local. I love it because I see them as other adults making their way. I help when I can. That’s my place with them and it is reciprocal. I am writing and that keeps me busy.</p>
<p>I think BIG birthdays cause us to re-evaluate our lives and the changes that we see. Deep down you know this what you raised them to be - successful men who enjoy you but don’t “need” you. They will be the ones who will soon be taking care of their families.</p>
<p>Happy Birthday Jym.
Similar feelings here. Happy H and I are still in the loop for good news. Wish we were more in the loop for Son’s everyday life.</p>
<p>Happy birthday. I am one year away from an empty nest, and we are going to move to a one bedroom apartment so we don’t have kids living with us when they are 30!
I’m kidding, but I have thought of downsizing some. I am starting to struggle with what I will do when my youngest is gone. I will have 3 kids in college at once, so won’t be able to take up any expensive hobbies for a couple of years.
I will likely work longer hours, but I may take up gardening or something more fun also. I THINK I’m ready for it, but I suspect I’ll find myself sobbing at random moments, thinking about those Cater’s PJs moments…
I’m even struggling this summer. We “shouldn’t” take a nice vacation, because of college costs, but then I think we are not likely to have many more family vacations… So I want to enjoy them while they are willing to travel with us. </p>
<p>Cheers! I hope you’re feeling better and didn’t require a firetruck with all those candles.</p>
<p>I have 2 successfully launched kids (done with school and married), one almost done with college and one in high school. My parenting days are clearly coming to an end. </p>
<p>I’m starting to think about what I’ll do next. I homeschooled all 4 (over 20 years in total) so I don’t have a job at an office to fall back on. </p>
<p>I love what one poster said: Grandbabies!!! I am really looking forward to having a few. With 4 kids, the odds are in my favor for getting at least a few grandchildren. And I can’t wait to buy Carters pj!! I remember buying them for my kids. I loved those pjs.
Right now I’m setting aside clothing patterns for baby/toddler/children. I love to sew and do look forward to sewing for the grandchildren. Meanwhile, I do sew baby gifts for my friends’ kids and for my friends who are becoming grandparents.</p>
<p>Thank you for all the very helpful comments, everyone ( and for the birthday salutations). It has been a day of mixed emotions. That article from the Globe was very poignant, notrichenough. Thanks for posting that.</p>
<p>Oh you’re all getting me quite sad. As I type this, my 26 year old is in the kitchen, getting another meal and making a mess. I so wish I could say he’s launched.</p>
<p>^Mine when she was in 10th grade did not have a driver license yet. She got it few days after she turned 16 (in 11th grade). So, I was still driving her around…into very many places, to very many activities and friends…after work. The abcense of non-driving kid would have been very noticable. But we do not have a huge house either, just regular size 4-bedroom home and nobody ever spent time in these bedrooms except fo sleeping, we see, “notice” each other.</p>
<p>This must be in the air OP because I was thinking about asking this question myself.</p>
<p>Our K1 is a rising Jr in college and K2 is a hs Sr so in a year.</p>
<p>So in a little over a yr we will be “free birds” and I hit a big birthday milestone</p>
<p>(HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!)</p>
<p>I haven’t worked outside the home full time for a paycheck since 1992.
Have completed a grad degree and a doctorate since then, done plenty of vol work even with weekly commitment.
While I have done many interesting things since my kids were born, I have no clue how to really market myself and have no clue what I want to do now.</p>
<p>I have friends suggest I take up a hobby, join a gym, etc .
What I want is to be someplace doing something significant. Not just fill the hours with a part time job where I check my brain at the door.</p>
<p>I have generally loved being home and chose to be home. We made choices/sacrifices so I could and every so often I wish I could re-do it all–and do it better with “what I know now”</p>