<p>This thread is great. I’m sure I’ve pretty much broken all the rules at one time or another – too many instances to count. But you know what? If I had it to do over again I’d do it the same way, except maybe better in some instances :). </p>
<p>Yes, my name is FLVADAD and I’m a helicopterer; guilt free, completely unrepentent, and proud of it. In fact, I am so good at hovering I even whirr over some kids that don’t belong to me. Lots of kids out there could use an advocate from time to time, and I just happen to have a little extra carrying capacity. </p>
<p>As for mine, the youngest leaves the nest this year, and so far, none show signs of being handicapped or emotionally scarred. In fact, quite the opposite. </p>
<p>My name is FLVADAD…and I’m a helicopterer; guilt free, completely unrepentent, and proud of it.</p>
<p>This isn’t really a helicoptering story so much as a helicopter fantasy but my college sophomore daughter told me that one of her professors called her in for special meetings twice – each time to ask why she hadn’t been showing up regularly for class or turning in her work. My D was stunned because she says she hasn’t missed a class, participates regularly, and turns in all her work! I have no reason to not believe her because she has always been a conscientious student. She thinks the teacher may have her confused with another student or is a bit senile. I suggested that she print a photo of herself on each page of her HW and have him sign a receipt when she hands it in. She just said “Oh Mom.” I think I heard her eyes rolling in their sockets. </p>
<p>But still, judging from all these stories, a HW receipt, or even a consignment form to be signed by the teacher–might not be a bad idea! And maybe even a “due date” for returning a graded paper.</p>
<p>aj725, so many people tell young/new employees, “there are no stupid questions.” I hope that your first year associates figure out quickly that there *are *questions too stupid (or inappropriate) to ask you! </p>
<p>As for my firm, we’re just glad when they ask. Our dress code is “business casual” (except for court, big meetings, etc.) That’s a hard concept for lots of young folks to understand. If they’ve been wearing shorts and flip flops every day for the last seven years, then wrinkled khakis seems pretty dressed up to them. It’s always a sticky situation when you have to talk to a young person about their wardrobe or other personal issues that don’t actually involve their legal work product.</p>
<p>Clothing “war stories” in the office environment could be it’s own thread and I’m sure a pretty funny one at that. </p>
<p>On the helcopter issue, I operate as a stealth bomber, under the radar and invisible to the enemy (i.e. my kids), so all missions remain classified and top secret.</p>
<p>For most of us, I think it is difficult to know exactly how others (like teachers, counselors, and administrators) view our contacts and interventions. If these people are professional, they might give no outward indication whether they think we are raving, interfering lunatics, or simply asking a reasonable question.</p>
<p>Sometimes I honestly wonder which impression I am making.</p>
<p>^^anyone else catch the irony in “Skyhook’s” handle? There’s a helicopter by that name, and the device shown here is sometimes known by that name. I’m picturing a dangling teenager…</p>
<p>*This isn’t really a helicoptering story so much as a helicopter fantasy but my college sophomore daughter told me that one of her professors called her in for special meetings twice – each time to ask why she hadn’t been showing up regularly for class or turning in her work. My D was stunned because she says she hasn’t missed a class, participates regularly, and turns in all her work! I have no reason to not believe her because she has always been a conscientious student. She thinks the teacher may have her confused with another student or is a bit senile. I suggested that she print a photo of herself on each page of her HW and have him sign a receipt when she hands it in. She just said “Oh Mom.” I think I heard her eyes rolling in their sockets. </p>
<p>But still, judging from all these stories, a HW receipt, or even a consignment form to be signed by the teacher–might not be a bad idea! And maybe even a “due date” for returning a graded paper.*</p>
<p>I’m glad that many colleges now have electronic submittals of homework! The child now has proof of submitting hw.</p>
<p>My kids’ high school has it for essays, but not for math and such.</p>
<p>What helps me most is when my entire family helps me helicopter, felt by my kids as a whirring group hug. </p>
<p>Last month, S-2 traveled overseas with a female co-producer of student films, basically equivalent to a lab partner. She’s native to that country so makes a great travel companion. The non-couple stopped in for home hospitality with my relatives. </p>
<p>My inbox is now full of reassurances to me that they seem to just be friends. I believed S when he said so from the outset, but all my relatives assumed I needed and wanted that info. It is great to have helipads in many locations.</p>
<p>My parents never handled school issues for me and here is why: </p>
<p>In the fifth grade, my English teacher sent home a note that had numerous spelling mistakes and grammatical errors (it was typed and everything, not a quick handwritten note). I corrected it (with proofreading marks) and gave it back to her. [She had often mis-corrected my papers and taken off points for sentences that were grammatically correct.] She then called my parents in for a conference to inform them that I was being a bad student for correcting her in front of the class. My parents then informed her that one, it was an issue between her and me not her and them, and two that she should learn proper English if she wanted to be an English teacher that wouldn’t get corrected by a 10 year old. </p>
<p>I had numerous grade corrections in middle school, high school, and now in college. It is my job to take it up with the teacher and if the teacher does not cooperate then it is my job to find someone who will. I have never let it fall to my parents as it is not their grade, it is mine. I have found though that with most teachers, as long as you talk to them one on one then they will be much more receptive then if you send in the parents. Obviously, there are crazy teachers that will not cooperate no matter what but these are generally well known to counselors and principals and therefore most would be willing to help if an unruly teacher situation arises.</p>
<p>My parents are completely non-helicopter parents. They firmly believe in the “you made your bed, now lie in it” type philosophy. I mean, they had their suggestions and they always tried to steer us in the right direction, but they certainly let us make our own mistakes.</p>
<p>From the beginning of high school up until the summer before my senior year, I had been set on going to a military academy. Well, after talking with a few friends that had gone through with it and visiting West Point and Annapolis, I wasn’t quite sure. And the application process was daunting.</p>
<p>Well beginning of my senior year, I told my parents I wasn’t going to apply to an academy anymore. My mom asked me if I was interested in doing ROTC instead. I said that I was. But by that point I was so burnt out from the application process, what with the Medical tests, LOR’s, Congress Appointments. I didn’t even want to touch another application.</p>
<p>My mom started an NROTC application unbeknownst to my knowledge. All she did was put my name and test scores and parent information. I soon started getting calls from the scholarship coordinator saying he wanted to interview me for the scholarship in a week and could I have the application finished? </p>
<p>Long story short, I got the scholarship to a wonderful school. I’m not too mad she did it.</p>
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