Romani, thank you. Yes it was. I know you will understand this (pardon the derail). He was sick but stable when my D was home for winter break. I swear to you this is the truth. She left on Friday night and by Saturday morning he refused to eat, drink or go out. He just laid down and it was clear by Sunday morning that he was done. I truly believe that he realized she had left and he couldn’t fight the fight without her anymore.
Yes, I absolutely understand that. He held out to see her one last time but couldn’t do it any longer.
He is in very good company at the Rainbow Bridge.
@zoosermom, so sorry. 
(I have to say that Miss Pea, although adorable, doesn’t rival Uno in my eyes, either.)
So sorry Zoosermom!
This is such an interesting discussion. I went from shoulder length hair to very short a couple of months ago and truthfully, it never even occured to me to discuss it with my husband first. He has also shaved his head without telling me first and again, it never occurred to me to question why. I did ask him last night if it bothered him that I cut my hair without telling him first and he looked very surprised before responding that it is my hair and I should be able to do whatever I want with it with or without his approval. He did say that he prefers my hair long but that he admits that it is not because it is more or less flattering on me, but that he just has always liked long hair. I change my hair a lot and often it is very spur of the moment. If I thought about it long enough to tell him first, I would probably never make any changes! I do think that the reaction by a spouse to this whole issue reflects what their “normal” communication patterns are. So while it might seem trivial to some, to others it would go against everything that they have come to expect from their partner. I guess what it boils down to is, whatever works for your marraige, keep doing it!
Consolation, I would not be sorry if Miss Pea or a facsimile showed up on my doorstep in about a year or so.
“I did ask him last night if it bothered him that I cut my hair without telling him first and he looked very surprised before responding that it is my hair and I should be able to do whatever I want with it with or without his approval.”
I just want to note, again, we are not talking about approval. We are talking about consideration.
I don’t need my husband’s approval to buy a new bedspread - I can walk into a store by my own darn self - but I would consider his opinion and taste, and wouldn’t just come home and unfold a new bedspread on there that he might not like. We would make such a decision together, or if he said he didn’t care, then I’d go do it by myself.
I have a husband who is very (sometimes too much!) into “partnership, we make decisions together, two heads are better than one” when it comes to household matters. So that may be part of it.
I’m still quite certain this will be misinterpreted that I can’t tuck my hair behind my ears or put it into a ponytail without securing his prior written approval, LOL.
My H and I have been together for almost 37 years (married almost 32). He has longish, thick gray hair, a beard, and a mustache. I confess that I wouldn’t mind it if he had shorter hair and ditched the facial hair, but it’s not my head or face. I know that he prefers long hair on women, but I think mine looks terrible longer. I can’t imagine that something cosmetic like hair is a big deal to anyone.
Now, if a change in hair seemed to be a symptom of a larger problem - maybe someone thinks their partner is trying to impress a third party - that might be a cause for a discussion. Otherwise, grow it … cut it off … color it … leave it gray … whatever. It’s just hair.
I would much prefer it if our D went back to the pixie cut she had at around age 7 or so. Now, as a teenager, she looks like Cher. I don’t understand what it is with all that hair, but then there is a whole lot that I don’t understand about teenagers!
LOL, if my DH gave a rat’s patoot about the bedspread or some other decor item, I’d be doing the happy dance!! He is perfectly content to be left out of that decision-making. That said, his only issue is with the # of pillows on the bed. OK, there are 10. But still,his one thing is refusing to put them where they belong. He has progressed to dumping them, or some of them, willy nilly on the bed, but refuses to put them the decorative way they are supposed to be. If we ever have a disagreement, I threaten to buy more pillows 
^^^My DH will SAY he doesn’t care about the bedspread, but then he will say if he doesn’t like it. Last time I had it custom made, so when he opted out of the decision making, I warned him he had also opted out of voicing an opinion after the fact. But he couldn’t help himself and did say he liked it, but wondered if the cat hair would show. I said, “Oh, certainly, it will.”
Ha! Do you really have that many? I love it!
I only have four pillows and a stuffed beagle on my bed. DH knows he goes before the beagle goes.
When I met my H (at age 19) he had shoulder length hair and a full beard. Six years later, when our D was about a year old old, he unexpectedly cut his hair off and shaved his beard. Our D screamed every time he approached her for about a week. She refused to call him dada anymore and started calling him Bob (that is not his name). She still calls him Bob at age 23. And he still occasionally surprises us all by shaving off his beard or his hair. Me? I’ve had the same haircut more or less since HS.
On the topic, I don’t get bent out of shape (after 27 years of marriage) by haircuts, or clothing purchases, etc. The only thing that would really upset me is if he booked a vacation or bought a new car without discussing it with me.
Sometimes I think I’m lucky that H is color-blind (legally), so I’ve never really consulted him on many decorative/aesthetic issues. He’s fine with that and knows it’s not something he really cares about so whatever I do is OK.
That being said, I remember when I was in my mid-30s and cut my usually-very-longish-hair, very short. He was fine with it, but my mother had something to say about it.
Laugh of the day @megpmom!!
Yup. Master bedroom has 10. Guest bedroom has 11!
My partner doesn’t give a hoot what the blankets look like- as long as they’re fuzzy blankets.
It doesn’t matter if we make the bed (we don’t) or where anything goes. Inevitably, it will go wherever the dog puts it as she nests with the blankets, pillows, etc. If she doesn’t nest on the bed, she’ll drag them to her crate and sleep with them there. I wouldn’t have it any other way
My H had dark brown / almost black hair, which over the natural course of time started to turn gray. He was self-conscious about it and used one of those over the counter dyes. I did tell him that it was turning too dark and that he’d be better off just letting it naturally go gray instead of trying to make it shoe polish black again, and he listened.
megpmom-that story reminds me of what happened when D was a baby. H is blind as a bat without his glasses and takes them of only to sleep. So even in the dead of night, changing her diaper or giving her a bottle, he had his glasses on. One day he was holding her-she was maybe a couple of weeks old-and he took his glasses off to rub his eyes. HER eyes got so big I thought they were going to pop out of her head. She lay in his arms looking completely alarmed until he put them back on. I’m sure she thought he has removed part of his face!
In that master bedroom, I’ll meet your ten and raise you five pillows (15)!
DH uses the over-the-counter stuff on his beard. It looks good (natural), but I must admit I don’t even notice when it’s grown out and is almost all gray again.
@zoosermom, very sorry about your pup.