I just want to leave this story here because it’s probably the only thread where it would be relevant.
A few weeks ago, I told my partner that I wanted to cut off my hair and dye it red after the wedding (I’ve never permanently dyed my hair as I always donate it and they want uncolored hair.) But then I said I didn’t think I’d look good with red hair.
My partner responded with “Well, either way, you’ll look the same to me!”
It took me a good 5 minutes to realize he meant that it’s because he’s colorblind and can’t tell the difference between red and brown. I thought he was giving me the typical canned answer of “You’re always beautiful to me, dear” kinda thing
My husband doesn’t care about his own clothes. I buy them all. I’m not sure he even notices when I change the quilts on the beds.
Even when I’ve had some bad (and I mean bad) hair issues, he has been kind enough not to say a thing. I know he prefers my hair to be longer than shoulder length, but I just don’t have the patience to take care of that much hair anymore.
Add me to those who would love to know what the lost bet was. I think I’d rather no hair, than lost money.
DH prefers longer hair on me, but I have so little of it these days that it looks horrible. He shaved his moustache the day AFTER our wedding. No idea why, though I have made Samson and Delilah comments ever since.
DH wants me to figure out things like renovations, new paint, bedspreads, etc., but then feels he gets to opine on my decisions. Need to stand up to him a bit more on that score!
H gets veto power but even when we built our house he did not want to see every piece of granite or paint color.
Works fine.
Funny thing is that I can count on him to compliment me on an outfit that I really do not like. Yep, always tells me how nice I look. Use to be a blue dress that I felt dorky in. I finally just got rid of it.
DH had a beard for a while when our oldest was a baby and shaved it one day and DS burst into tears. When the same child was four months old, I left him for a few hours to go and get my hair permed for the first time in my life. It was a pretty big change. When I came home, he was starving and wanted to nurse. He took one look at me and got this very confused look on his face. He didn’t know what to do, his sense of smell seemed to be telling him it was safe to eat, but his sense of vision seemed to be warning him off. Hunger won out, but it was pretty funny.
There is no need to worry about DH shaving off a full head of hair since that ship sailed a long time ago. He does shave what remains which bugs me a bit as he could let it grow out a little bit. At one point, I suggested he might want to try a beard again since he hadn’t had one since DS was a baby. I pictured something well-groomed and distinguished. Well, he has let it grow completely out and he looks like Father Time. (Believe me it’s not for another woman, because the woman does not exist who would encourage this.) He just seems to like the way it feels and looks.
My husband is balding and it really upsets him. He has mentioned shaving his head casually , but I doubt he would really go thru with it. I prefer he doesn’t…not because I dislike a shave head, I just don’t think it would look that great on his light bulb shaped melon.
I don’t think he would like to keep up with the maintenance of a shaved head either.
I have hair just below shoulder length …when I cut it years ago, my youngest was about 5 . She cried her eyes out when she saw me. Buried her face in her sister’s chest and just wept.
A few years later , I did the same when I let her go out with same sister and she cut her long, white blonde hair into a short bob…but it did grow back
My H wears a ponytail. He hasnt always, and it isnt my favorite style on him. I had longish hair, ( about 15 yrs ago) which was mainly because he liked it, because I prefer shorter because, much less maintenance, & it suits me.
I asked him if he would cut his and he declined. Fair enough. I took the opportunity to empower * myself* & wear my hair differently, so I cut it off.
I change it up every couple years, but never growing it long again. I really look better with it shorter.
He can wear his hair like he wants, I remember him as he looked when I met him anyway, & I expect he would say the same about me.
My husband has a baby face. He decided to grow a beard to look older. This was in 1998. By 2007, he looked old enough, ha! He really didn’t want to shave it off. I asked if he would, if I lost 20 pounds. I did and then he did! It was a good deal for both of us.
DH is convinced that gravity exacerbates his hair loss, and believes keeping it shorter weighs less and wont fall out as fast. I know he’s kidding, but he hangs onto the story.
My Dad has always had a beard. Always, until one day about ten years ago, he shaved it off. We all said, “AHHH! Oh no, grow it back, quick!” He hasn’t shaved it off since.
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Well, now I can see why he didn’t say anything. To make such a bet, and then losing the bet and hair! Glad to hear the reason was so innocuous.
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I think this excuse sounds odd. Yes, people make such bets and lose. But how likely is it that a man would make such a bet, lose, and NOT MENTION it to his wife before carrying out the bet? Unless these two rarely speak to each other, I can’t imagine this.
I could see my H making such a crazy bet (he’s never done this, but I could see him having some smack-talk between friends about a sports game or whatever and then making this crazy bet)…but likely H would tell me about the bet before the results were in…and once he lost the bet, he’d at least say, “uh, I lost a bet and now have to shave my head so …uh…expect to see a bald guy in the next couple of hours.”
Maybe I’m the suspicious type, but this “after story” sounds concocted in order to satisfy curiosity. If he did do this for “someone else”, then likely the “someone else” supplied the “story” after H mentioned the wife’s curiosity. (oh, just tell her you lost a bet)
ML…my son has a mustache…he has had it since 1972. People who don’t know him well have commented “he will look great once that grows in”. Um…how many years does it take for a mustache to grow in?
Thumper, you have a son who was old enough to grow a mustache over forty years ago?
You certainly look good for your age!
My H had a pornstache when I met him. ( it was 1976). He wore it for a long time, then shaved it off but grew it back a couple years ago for Movember.
But now I can’t get him to shave it again!
I guess I should be grateful he shaves at all.
Even Sam Elliott finally shaved his off!
I think it’s ridiculous to assume there’s some hidden back story. Hair just isn’t that big a deal to some people, and they would never think to mention it in advance. Really I suspect that OP’s husband has never made such a drastic hair change (because honestly a lot of guys don’t vary much) so it’s never come up, and it just didn’t occur to him that it was something to discuss. Because for a lot of people (including some women) it’s just not.
“I think this excuse sounds odd. Yes, people make such bets and lose. But how likely is it that a man would make such a bet, lose, and NOT MENTION it to his wife before carrying out the bet? Unless these two rarely speak to each other, I can’t imagine this.”
I can totally see how this could happen. Some of us are blessed with spouses who share everything, perhaps bordering on TMI. Some have spouses who are not great communicators. If the whole thing was too embarrassing to him to begin with, it is possible that OP’s hubby was not willing to tell her when the bet was made. Maybe the bet/loss happened in a matter of a couple of hours, over a few mugs of beer, so there was no time to even tell about the bet…
But the OP clearly took this surprise “badly”. Which would lead me to believe that her H “should have” expected a strong reaction or should have confessed to the lost bet prior to heading to the barber shop.
I get that some people might not give a hoot. But you would think that you would know your spouse well enough to know if one of them would benefit from a heads up. (oops - was that a pun???)
^^
Right…and if not a “heads up” before the shaving, then at least once he saw her reaction, you’d think he would have said, “I can tell that you are surprised, but I lost a bet.”
No, he said nothing and only gave the excuse LATER…that is why this sounds weird to me. The excuse sounds like it was “given” to the H by someone else…and then given to the wife.
