Glad you’re doing well, evermom! Keep in mind there will be some highs and lows, but it sounds like both you and your son are in a good place.
I’m jealous of all those hotel bills you’ll skip 
An abstinence only state and a Jesuit school for college? seriously? These are the good ole’ days! I respect your choices but that’s an eye opener for me. I wish you all the best of luck and by the sound of the condom supply I can only guess what the results of the hypocrisy will be. College is a great time to stop listening to the BS ppl have been shoving down your throat and learn to think for yourself and make your own decisions especially about your own body.
Hi all, I’m new here, thanks to Oldmom4896, who sent me this link and i joined up!
I take my D for freshman year on Saturday, about 5 hours drive away, she moves in Sunday, and I come home alone Sunday. I’m a stone single mother; she’s the only kid.
Here’s my things – she has been what people call a Tough Cookie from day 1. Just who she is. The strongest will since Samson. I’ve had alot to deal with but people keep saying things like “you did the best you could” or “you did a great job!” She’s basically what you’d call a “good kid.” She’s just impossible. She’s the Socializer Extraordinaire. Makes friends in a nanosecond. Day camp counselor all summer. Not home one single weekend in the last 7. I mean the whole 72 hours, not home. Not home for any semblance of dinner or family even one night the whole summer.
My issues are that I feel abandoned and empty-nested already, it’s been going on a while. Plus I feel angry that I’m her factotum. Money, keys to the car, $$$ -Target trip, wake her up and get her out every day on time, etc.
I feel she is giving me nothing. I’m afraid she’s kind of “done” with me.
Not packed, not organized, hasn’t done the alcohol online course, thinks it’s due September but I think it’s due Friday. She’s a very iffy student. Had lots and lots of help in her private high school. Has various L.D.s that can be gotten around if only she’d admit to it and go for the help. I told you, “difficult,” right?
I’ve rambled a bit, sorry, just here to ask if anyone has any aspects of this situation, and how are you handling it, if at all? Opinions? New Yorker cartoons?
Thanks!
Ask and you shall receive.
One of my great organizing principles in life is that Roz Chast has a perfect cartoon for every occasion.
@amylou2, I have a feeling that you’ll find that your daughter is not at all done with you once college starts and she discovers that she actually needs to do things on her own and doesn’t want to or know how to.
@saintfan, that’s a great cartoon!
Like @evermom1, I dropped off my D yesterday, and while I had been dreading the day since she started college applications just about a year ago, it wasn’t as bad as I anticipated. Of course, when I opened the refrigerator this morning and saw her cherry Coke that won’t be drunk for months and then the empty spot for her toothbrush in the bathroom, it kind of hit me all over again.
I’m a single mom with one kid like @amylou2. Mine was also a day camp counselor and while she was never gone all weekend, she did borrow the car a lot (although she was good at putting gas in it) and spent a lot of time with friends (i.e. not with me). So that was kind of the baby steps leading up to her departure for me. While there might have been days I felt she was “done” with me, I know that she is not. I was happily surprised when just after I had finally gotten into bed after a long day of moving in and driving that she texted me good night.
@Barbalot, Yea! Another move-in report. I love that she texted you good night. Soooo SWEET. As for those left behind goodies in the fridge and freezer, wouldn’t those dove bars have gone bad if I hadn’t eaten them? ;
I got in the habit of taking to work or the food pantry the foodstuffs my daughters didn’t eat while they were home.
@rosered55, Great idea!
@evermom1 - that theory doesn’t work here . . . I will be discarding the remainder of the hot pockets and the ramen will save until December. Talk about middle age weight gain. If I eat away all the left over teenage boy food I will have a lot to talk about on that thread. 
Although my one-and-only daughter left for sophomore year six days ago, today is when I am finally getting back into the groove of shopping and cooking for myself. It was a very big adjustment last year, especially in the supermarket, but a lot easier the second time around. And hopefully I can duplicate last year’s feat of losing 20 pounds by shopping and cooking just for me.
@oldmom4896, 20lbs? That is inspirational!
Thanks, @evermom1. A little less inspirational if you knew how much more I have to go!
I posted earlier while still at work. Went to the grocery store tonight and every aisle seemed to hold some sort of vestige of D’s childhood favorites, and I almost lost it. We’ve shopped mostly at the same grocery store since she was small, and some of the workers remember her from way back when. The upside: a much reduced bill – and more veggies.
Amyloid and old,more,
Nice to meet you! For years I felt like I was the only single mom posting about the one and only leaving the nest. It’s been 11 years for me, as an empty nester. I still dream of son as a toddler, and the years when every weekend we hosted an overnight for 4-8 kids.
Hi @bookworm …another single mom with a one and only who just went back to college last week…
I have spent several days moping…still trying to snap out of it and get on with things. It is hard…she keeps telling me I need to date! Good grief…!
That’s great, Evermom! You did good. My oldest is going back to school tomorrow…he just informed me today, he has an apartment. Then we take the youngest Wednesday for the big drop off. I’m just getting sadder and sadder. What brings me to tears is remembering him young.
@Barbalot, I haven’t done my first shopping outing yet; there is still so much food in the house. I’m looking forward to shopping and having more salads for dinner. I have done the one thing I’ve been looking forward to, turning the thermostat up from a chilly 73 degrees to a comfy 75.
To everyone, before this thread, I never knew there were so many single moms making their kids a priority and giving them their all. It’s good to know I wasn’t that unique. I don’t feel so much like an odd duck. And it’s good to hear how couples deal with the same issue. Sharing, it’s a good thing.