<p>^which is why most home institutions provide P/F grades, the only ones that are recorded (many foreign institutions simply don’t issue transcripts, or don’t for semester-long study).
In any case, not something OP should worry about. No need to add even more stress for reasons unlikely to apply.</p>
<p>Are you in an “immersion” program, such as ISEP, where you’re essentially dropped into the foreign university and told to fend for yourself, or is it a “transition” program (you’re with Americans part of the time, with Europeans the rest of the time)? Is there an adviser for American students at the university, or an international adviser who knows the system on your home campus?</p>
<p>A Fall break should be coming up soon, right?</p>
<p>You mentioned your s/o has not been supportive. Why not combine some funds so the s/o can visit you mid-semester? A friend from home could make a big difference.</p>
<p>By the way, I know people who get into their college of choice, or job, but take at least 6 months to accommodate. </p>
<p>This was good to read today; I think not feeling well makes a huge difference. I hope things look up soon! DD is spending a semester abroad in India, and right now nearly everyone in her program is sicker than a dog and missing classes. She is having a rough time adjusting to the restrictions placed on women and the caste system, but I will have her focus on difference without making value judgments. She can do that when she gets back to the U.S. and thinks about race, class, and income inequality.</p>
<p>The U.S. is probably unique in its discussion based classes. If nothing else, experiencing classes overseas would inform one of how others are taught in our ever more global work world.</p>
<p>My son was in three different study abroad programs and Tufts only gave him pass fail credit. Since he’d done much better overseas, he actually ended up reporting a Tufts GPA and a separate self calculated GPA. I remember in France that the number grades I got were much lower than their American equivalents. Once I caught on, it was fine, but a bit of a shock at first.</p>
<p>Distinctly reminds me of visiting the Parthenon while in college, a site that was virtually holy to me at the time, standing at the foot of the Acropolis in a state of anticipatory rapture, and hearing a woman with a strong NY accent proclaiming, “Now that I can say I’ve been here, I’m not going to climb up that hill!” </p>
<p>And I don’t think anyone is “hectoring,” I think we are trying to whip up some enthusiasm in the OP by pointing out great experiences she might have. </p>
<p>@xiggi Belgium is a country I’ve only traveled through on the way to somewhere else. Now I’m ready to book my tickets! :)</p>
<p>My son did study abroad in Brussels and we went two weeks at the end of his studies for a vacation (he was our tour guide!). His university classes were only pass/fail. One class given by his own state side university was graded
First, get yourself well! Belgium has so much to offer so please don’t miss it! There are so many day/weekend trips to be had since it is so centrally located. Grab a buddy and go. Train travel is easy and cheap flights abound also. My son visited Paris, Amsterdam, Bruges (gorgeous), Berlin, Barcelona. He tried his best but couldn’t fit in all the places he wanted to go.<br>
There must be groups of study abroad students from other universities–latch onto one of them. They don’t know each other before the trip–I’m sure they’d be welcoming of you also.
Go to “La’mour Fou” for lunch/dinner (one of my son’s fave) which is near the university. Go hit the music museum (fantastic). The military museum is wonderful. Watch the light show at night in the grand plaza. Tour the European parliament. I hope you’ve already hit some of the places despite not being well. Hit the flea market on a weekend.</p>
<p>Is it possible the weather and/or less sunlight is affecting you? Northern Europe is much farther north than most American believe. I worked for a Dutch company for many years and spent many weeks in Amsterdam in the fall and was shocked how early is got dark. I also found it cold and damp, which was a chill I found hard to shake while I was there. </p>
<p>^^
The weather could indeed play a role, and I believe that this year has been particularly wet in Belgium. It does affect one when everything is damp and grey. But that does not mean that wonderful Fall and Winter days do no exist. The seasonal changes are spectacular, and the Bois de la Cambre (close to the ULB) offers great views. The OP might try to book a walking tour. Worth to take that camera with you. </p>
<p>The other part is that Belgians have turned the inclement weather to their advantage by having great cafés, restaurants, art galleries, and other indoor pleasures. This is not unique to Brussels, as other cities are doing just as well, but Brussels has developed its own flavor, and flavorful it is. </p>
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<p>I hope you do. With my belgian roots (and my B passport) I am obviously biased, but the country has become one of my favorites. I have to admit that I did not like it so much when I was forced to travel as a kid. Getting (a bit) older has opened my eyes to its beauty and charm. Also, being legally allowed to try the beers has played a part! </p>
<p>If you decide to go, check Thumper’s note on her trip to Brussels. She might offer a perspective slightly different from mine. All in all, there are no perfect tourist destinations, but the combination of joie de vivre, great food, and history makes Brussels (and Bruges, Ghent, and Antwerp) a very interesting place to spend a few days. </p>
<p>Even if an umbrella is the weapon of choice! </p>
<p>Not joking! I’m pretty cynical about study abroad, and (as someone with a foreign-sounding accent in the US) I have been subjected to more than my share of braggy study abroad stories. It’s not the only motivation, but it certainly seems to turn out that way.</p>
<p>I do think the tone has turned a bit hectoring. I’m sure that OP is just as capable of reading a travel guide as the rest of us, and presumably knows something about the town. She did choose to go there, after all. I am sympathetic to the thought that light might make a big difference - it is far darker in Brussels than anywhere in the US outside Alaska. She might want to look into a SAD light, perhaps?</p>
<p>Culture shock is real, and there’s nothing to be gained by denying it. OP, just take it one day at a time, and seriously consider visiting a doctor if you still feel pretty bad.</p>
<p>Against my better judgment, I will respond. </p>
<p>Could this be a case of missing the point of sharing “travel guide stuff” or not really knowing what the term hectoring means! I am mystified about this allegation of … bullying in the form of posts on a public forum. But you might see it differently. </p>
<p>As far as sharing “travel tips” please consider that a student who is sick and homesick might have focused on the dark and dreary. She, obviously, has not found much pleasure in her stay or with her fellow students. Encouraging her to break that cycle of unhappiness through pedestrian activities such as window shopping, stopping for a waffle, or walking to Friterie Antoine and the EU center will not make her jump up and down in joy. However, while we cannot do or suggest anything regarding what she left behind in the US, “we” might try to make her see the positives that hide behind the greyish walls and perhaps uncleanliness of an older city in Europe. </p>
<p>Fwiw, if you were familiar with my posts, you might note that I am equally cynical about study abroad programs, as many are glorified entertainment. I also believe that their value is indirectly proportional to the selectivity of a US program. Students who leave behind world class facilities or pampering residential colleges will find it difficult to embrace a large state commuter university in Europe. For those students, it might make no sense to travel abroad to find a better or more instructive program. Yet, for many, spending time abroad is exhilirating. I happen to a view biased by the fact that I could have joined many of the European programs at virtually no cost, and after … graduating in the US. All in all, those choices are individual! </p>
<p>Now, back to the OP, she IS in Brussels and has not found the happiness that she expected. Some here have encouraged her to give it a “shot.” Having spent plenty of time in Brussels, I CAN see the positives and the negatives of the city, and I CAN understand that the initial impressions were underwhelming. That will not change overnight, but it should and WILL get better over time and with a better attitude or health. </p>
<p>Please allow some of us to think that the student might feel better by enjoying the simples of pleasures that are found in tourist guides. It does work for most people who keep an open mind. </p>
<p>Just a quick response - as someone who has (I bet) spent more time in Brussels than you, I think you might be agreeing with me: </p>
<p>“Having spent plenty of time in Brussels, I CAN see the positives and the negatives of the city, and I CAN understand that the initial impressions were underwhelming. That will not change overnight, but it should and WILL get better over time and with a better attitude or health.”</p>
<p>Sounds a lot like what I meant when I suggested that she take it one day at a time. But when someone is genuinely facing SAD or culture shock, telling them to have a ‘better attitude’ is like telling a depressed person to ‘cheer up’ or ‘snap out of it’. It’s more for our benefit than for the person in question.</p>
<p>" Please allow some of us to think that the student might feel better by enjoying the simples of pleasures that are found in tourist guides. It does work for most people who keep an open mind."</p>
<p>I agree. But I choose to believe (perhaps wrongly) that OP read the tourist guides before she left, and knows all about pita street and all the rest.</p>
<p>Here are my 2 cents…whether it be by joining a club, choir, book group, regional cooking class or through an athletic pursuit, try to position yourself to make a friend. Developing a friendship or two will make a huge difference. It does not have to be deep and meaningful. You just want a buddy. I wonder if your academic program has any fun extras going on outside of the classroom where you can meet people in a non-academic setting. My D lived for nine months in Paris and while it is considered an amazing place, dear D found her academic life not as inspiring as she had hoped it would be. She didn’t really enjoy life in France until she had created a life outside of school. Over time she grew to love her host family (and still does almost ten years later) but it was having a companion (or two) to muck around with once in a while that made all the difference. She developed one friendship at a cooking class offered by her home university in Paris…and I can state for the record until that at the time she had only set foot in the kitchen to open the refrigerator door for a snack. Though her initial connection was made with an American she did eventually make a few “go out for a coffee” Parisian friends at school. </p>
<p>It is lousy when you feel you have no control over a situation and can’t see how to make it better…I feel for you. Best of luck.</p>
<p>All great points of discussion and points of view. We only wish the OP the best!
Anybody seen “Avenue Q” ? There is a song called “There is Life Outside Your Apartment” that just keeps coming to mind. The character hates his new life in the new city and his new friends drag him out kicking and screaming out of his safe apartment space to experience the city life first hand. New York. All good? No. but bad? No. Just different.</p>
<p>I don’t care where you are–it’s tough to adjust to new environments. New city, new relationships, new social club, new job. It’ll haunt you forever… It has so much to do with attitude adjustment, taking deep breaths and giving yourself space and permission to adjust. Which is one great thing about world travel–you learn to adjust your attitude and expectations–and then learn something from the experience. There is no “right or wrong” about how you feel but learning that you can adapt to new environments and learn from them is invaluable.</p>
<p>I can barely relate to this notion that culture shock is inevitable. These are adventures and, like any trip, there are ups and downs, challenges and things we miss. We can do glass half full- which is what I thought xiggi and others were trying to offer. (Has been working on me, has me intrigued.) </p>
<p>Thing is, sometimes when you relocate, you do get sick- that has to be tackled. You end one cycle and another begins. Get some med help. Otherwise it’s all so depleting. Been there.</p>
<p>I think you meant to write … “as someone who has (I bet) spent more time in Brussels than I have, I think you might be agreeing with me”</p>
<p>Otherwise, I am not sure where there is a disagreement. I objected to the term hectoring and to the pejorative qualifier related to suggesting to do the “tourist thing.” None of us here are offering deep psychology to the OP. And none are hectoring her in doing things she might not like. I think that all of use are trying to make suggestions work. </p>
<p>As far as Brussels go, I think it is understandable that someone is frustrated by the prospect of spending several month without much joy. As I said, I probably would have had a similar reaction in the first of my dozens of trips to my parents’ homeland. I started to enjoy it as a (quasi) adult when I started to spend more time than a few days at once. </p>
<p>Again, none of us as the perfect solution to make Spaghetti feel better about her decision. I just think that we should not be negative about the suggestions that are different from our own. </p>
<p>No, I meant what I wrote (though clearly the way I put it is a bit unclear). I am pretty certain that I’ve spent more time in Brussels than you.</p>
<p>“. I objected to the term hectoring and to the pejorative qualifier related to suggesting to do the “tourist thing.””</p>
<p>I certainly didn’t intent ‘tourist’ to be a pejorative. It’s not pejorative. The only people who find it pejorative are pretentious and deluded ‘travellers not tourists’, IME. But I was suggesting that suggesting lots of things for the OP to do that take up half a day or a day may not be particularly helpful.</p>
<p>" Again, none of us as the perfect solution to make Spaghetti feel better about her decision. I just think that we should not be negative about the suggestions that are different from our own."</p>
<p>Agreed, but I suppose the difference is that I’m not trying to make her feel better about it. My point is that it’s perfectly OK to feel bad.</p>
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<p>It’s been working on you? Are you currently abroad and feeling down?</p>
<p>Haha, unless you are willing to share how long you have lived in Belgium, we will never know! People who know me in real life might find your “bet” hard to win. But there is no point in debating our mutual lengths of stay. Perhaps, it might be better to measure our degree of understanding or knowledge of Brussels in terms of … offering reasonable suggestions. Not being a deluded tourist, you should have plenty of opportunities to show how accurate your views of Brussels really are. </p>
<p>From what I gathered, your suggestions are to accept to be homesick and buy some DB tickets. As much as feasting on beer and sausages at an Oktoberfest might fit my own plans, I happen to think that the OP might find solace in her local environment. </p>
<p>Of course, if your interest is solely to stir the pot and be contrarian, it would be a short discussion. Try to play nice,</p>
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