I have not read the whole thread yet…need to offer (((((HUGS))))) first, now back to reading.
Oh, @BeeDAre, (((hugs))). What a terrific parent you are.
I know now to never underestimate the kindness - and moral support - from random strangers on the internet!
Seriously, I am overwhelmed with gratitude from all of the advice, kind words of encouragement and support, and your own stories messaged to me. It has all been so, so helpful. Thank you!!
D went out with a close school friend tonight, just to hang out and shop for prom dresses. She has not been out in a while, since Christmas break - really! - with friends, IN PERSON.
I’m happy to see her having a little fun on the weekend, finally.
^^^ @BeeDAre thank you for sharing your D’s struggles with us. I know this thread will help someone down the line - maybe even some of us who are lending you support and e-hugs but who have not personally experienced what you’re going through as a parent. I’m so glad your D went out with a friend tonight. Thank you for updating us. We’re pulling for you and your D.
@BeeDAre Thank you so much for sharing. I can relate to certain elements of your D’s story with my S - especially the part about minimizing risk, withdrawing from friends and activities, etc. Looking back, I think the anxiety was always there, but I didn’t notice it until it became overwhelming. Counseling has been helpful. Your daughter is lucky to have your support. Hope things start to look up.
It’s great that your D ventured out with a friend. I know little visits and outings meant s great deal to my kids when they were suffering with their chronic health issues.
Hope you family is doing well. Best to you.
Just thought I’d check back in here, briefly.
D is, this week, “transitioning” back to school. She’s been going to the program one day, then to school for two days in a row (her school is on block schedule). The first two days back at school she went half a day, but now it’s whole days.
First - I am beyond happy I took her to the clinic that day, a few weeks ago, and had her evaluated and got her into this program. It has been such a tremendous help for her so far.
In addition to all-day group and behavioral therapy, she’s been prescribed Lexapro, and seems to be responding well to that.
She has an appointment set up for seeing a therapist weekly after her last day in the program - next week - and has been set up with a regular psychiatrist as well.
We checked into her future university’s Student Counseling Center and it seems more than adequate. We even spoke with someone there when she and I went to the Admitted Students Day. I think her university is going to be a supportive place for her.
I don’t know if I mentioned already in this thread - i know I did on the Parents of '16 thread - but after a lot of discussion and thought, we’ve all decided the best thing for her right now is to let her proceed as originally planned and go away to university.
For one, we all believe she will thrive and bloom when she gets into a new environment.
Of course, we could all be wrong - but my husband and I believe, firmly, that we have to allow her to have that chance. We, of course, will help her get a support network in place, with the student counseling center, when she arrives. The plan is for her to maintain what she has learned these past few weeks…
Back at school, she dropped an AP class that she’d always struggled with, with a W/P, and is quickly getting caught up now in her other classes. She’s making a point to get some exercise and fresh air every day, eat better, enough sleep, and learning - slowly, 
- that it’s okay to let go of things sometimes if it’s too much of an un-necessary struggle…
Her teachers and the school admin have been incredibly supportive and cooperative. Best of all, D is finally being more open in communicating with them, and us. One of the things she was required to do upon going back to school, was ask for help from her guidance counselor, and any teachers, and make a list of things, regarding what she needed from them, and at school, in order to succeed academically before graduating.
So far, I see her slowly coming out of her shell. She’s been really open to receiving help, and implementing what she’s learned - her case manager said she’s even taken something of a leadership role in groups.
I hope she can continue like this. I’ve struggled, myself, with depression in my younger adult and teen years, and I know it’s work to manage the illness, and maintain one’s own health and life balance… She has much more support than I did, though, thank goodness, and I just hope she will keep seeking help when she needs it.
Finally, thank you all who PM’d me , or responded here, with your own stories and advice and sharing info - I cannot tell you how grateful I am for your openness and kindness.
Awesome! It sounds like she has lots of support and is making all the right moves.
So happy for you and your daughter, @BeeDAre. I’m sure she feels very lucky to have supportive parents like you and your husband. Your love and support is a gift that she’ll carry with her throughout her life and I’m sure it has made your relationship with each other tighter and stronger.
What @doschicos said!
Wow. It sounds like your daughter and your family are moving ahead and forging new pathways, acknowledging the strategies she must undertake for staying healthy and growing into her new roles as college student and young adult.
I like that she has a list which lets her see that her path forward is an interdependent one, where she has expectations of others as she seeks to meet her goals, and she understands there will be expectations by others of her, and together there are plans in place for her to reach her goals.
We are so much healthier and more cheerful when we share the load, and let others know what we are carrying, letting them know we may need to lean on them every once in a while.
I hear such hopefulness in your “voice” that I can see how such a young person, who has decided to keep moving with a band of supporters in her corner, is taking leadership roles in the group. She believes in herself because you believe in her.
I wish you all the best.
Thank you, @Waiting2exhale .
She is so, so lucky to have wonderful caring parents. Thank you for sharing your story and her progress - wishes will continue for progress, end of senior year, a fun summer and hope for the fall!
Wonderful news. I agree with you and your husband that sending your D to college is the right move if it’s something she wants, and if she’s ready to seek/get the help she might need.
In the meantime, be nice to yourself, @BeeDAre. You’ve been through the wringer !
Wonderful update! Thanks for sharing.
Thanks for the update! It sounds like light has returned to your daughter’s life and hope returned to yous in your post.
I love that your daughter is more open communicative. It’s hard to reach out for help when people are saying this is the time you should be pulling away.
If she enrolls for classes this fall, it might be a very good idea to take a lighter load, and to choose the classes that are least likely to cause her anxiety.
You might take a look at tuition insurance for next year. For a lot of people, it is too expensive for the low risk but when the student has a condition that increases the risk of withdrawing from school mid-semester, it can be worth it.
And before purchasing tuition insurance, check with how the school deals with and processes petitions of medical withdrawal with financial consideration in semester. Read the school’s related policies and discuss it with the staff in academic advising and financial aid. Put in place FERPA waivers and HIPAA/healthcare POA.