I don’t see why that’s MIL’s concern. Surely the CCRC can do something to help sick residents, like deliver meals, even if they add delivery charge. If not, there is the son, only 30 minutes away.
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I think it’s great no further visits were planned. Maybe they both need more time to think. I’d take MIL out for tea and mention how you had hoped to hear about her tea on the trip.
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I think taking her to tea is a great idea. It’s really unfortunate she had one reasonable request and Bob didn’t make it happen.
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It’s too bad she didn’t want to or couldn’t go herself if Bob didn’t want to go. I love afternoon tea!
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A couple of things…
It is too bad your MIL did not do the afternoon tea on the ship, something she had looked forward to doing. I understand that Bob had been on this cruise multiple times and wanted to be the expert guide to all the things he wanted to show her, but assuming she expressed some interest aloud to him about the tea, it is disconcerting she did not do it, which implies a bit too much control over their doings.
Perhaps it is a good thing Bob is ill right now (not that I would wish anyone to be ill!!) in that it may provoke thought about how illness and caring for him may very well be part of the picture at their age if they marry or cohabitate, and life is not going to be like on the cruise. Food for thought. A dose of reality. Life is not a vacation.
I also think Bob is in too much of a rush to get married. I realize they don’t have decades to look forward to, but still, much more time is needed to consider that step. They’ve met up a couple of times and went on one vacation together. Not enough to go by to uproot oneself, move, marry, etc.
I would not speak negatively of Bob to MIL and would support that she has had a happy experience so far (presumably) but encourage taking her time before committing long term (if Bob were any man or potential life partner).
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There is usually at least some open seating on cruise ships and many people are happy to include someone to their table if that person doesn’t have anyone joining them for tea .
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That’s good to know. Going on a cruise this fall. My husband isn’t thrilled with tea and I’m sure we would be happy to each have some time away from each other 
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My last cruise many years ago with a friend, I went to afternoon tea on my own because I wanted to try out each kind of meal at least once. And I don’t even drink tea normally! Actually, I wanted to try out all the little sandwiches and tea cakes. It was fine by myself.
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Not all cruise lines have tea. MIL and Bob were on the Queen Mary II and I think they have 2 kinds, one you pay extra for and one ‘plain’ one. I think Disney has an Alice tea party on some cruises that is mostly aimed at young kids but of course all welcome.
When I was looking at different cruises, one was a Cunard line and the only thing I really wanted to do on it was High Tea. Didn’t go on that one, but I would have gone to tea alone if need be.
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Seabourn does high tea as well. Highly recommend going if it’s an option on your cruise line!
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Princess, Holland America have afternoon tea. There are others
I’m doing a Viking Ocean cruise. There’s tea every day at 4 pm
I guess I didn’t think I needed to say that. I was happy that someone said that they were invited to join a group if they were a single.
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I think that is a function of the demographics for older adults, too. There are always far, far more older women than older men, and so older men can sometimes be quite sought after, especially in senior living communities.
Additionally, I think for older generations and/or for those with more conservative (so to speak) social norms around co-habitating, many older people do jump to marriage versus companionship.
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I think it’s an interesting question if in fact Bob decided he needed to go outside his town and CCRC to find his next wife
It would seem to me that he’s exhausted or worn out his welcome with his current acquaintances
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I’m unclear about where Bob is now. Has he been hospitalized? I hope MIL doesn’t get sick.
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I think he’s at his CCRC, not in the hospital, which is why the MIL is concerned about getting food.
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How did Bob get food before? Does he have any friends in the CCRC who might be willing to do a shopping run for him…or would his son do this for Bob, considering Bob is ill.
My opinion…if the son doesn’t step up, this should tell MIL what she might end up doing if she moves in with Bob. No help from his kids…wouldn’t be a good sign.
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Exactly.
Another random thought. Even though chemists are generally good cooks, for some reason, based on what has been written here, I don’t think Bob is into cooking. A bunch of groceries would not do without having someone who would be willing to whip up a meal from them.
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@Hoggirl this sounds like an upscale CCRC. The first reach out should be to the dining there to see if meals can be delivered. Bob or his son can arrange that.
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Not sure why anyone would worry about Bob and food. His son or anyone could place a grocery order online with easy to plate stuff and/or have DoorDash deliver food every other day or so. Food, drinks, drugstore stuff - all can be sent to him - right??
Assuming if they didn’t keep him at the hospital he is capable of popping food in the microwave or peeling a banana to eat.
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