<p>Just returned from shopping with DS. It went surprisingly well. The newspaper ran a list of things to bring to college and it was a useful tool to get him thinking about packing, since he leaves next Friday.
We found the list itself a bit absurd (21 pairs of underwear!), but it was a good starting point for our conversation. We determined that his alarm clock is broken, 6 boxers is not enough, a mattress pad is a good idea and ibuprophen and band-aids would be handy. He added Pringles and mouthwash to the list. Off to Target and now I think we are done in one swell foop except for some computer items that will come from a discount electronics store.
Next up: Packing and The Launch</p>
<p>Eight more days until I send my D off – she is just about done packing and amazingly has gotten everything into five boxes. It makes me marvel once again at the differences between siblings. When older D went, the van was so jam-packed that I wasn’t sure there was going to be room her her. I’m still looking for good tape/putty/something to hang stuff on the walls. Recommendations anyone? I’m thinking the 3M double sided?</p>
<p>I have been reading this column for a while now and i have to say that it has been interesting… I was surprise to find out all you mothers/fathers do for your kids. Considering that during SAT testing and aplications my parents hd no idea what was going on. My counselor at school became my parent i guess you could say… Anyways just wanted to say thank you because of your postings i have learn of alot I have to do. I am first in my family to go the iniversity and well I as lots for a while and then I started reading this thread. </p>
<p>Anyways good luck to all your kids in college… </p>
<p>Goodbye </p>
<p>much love annavela.</p>
<p>Oh and im trying to get my mom on this thread so maybe she’ll join you soon</p>
<p>annavela–I’m so glad you posted and that you have learned much from this thread. It’s only now as I send my oldest child off to college I realize all I didn’t know when I was a first generation student. I wish the internet had existed then. If you get into a bind at some point, feel free to come on back. </p>
<p>Annavela… best of luck to you this year! There are a lot of wise and experienced voices on this thread as Ive come to learn as well, so I concur with rrah’s advice. Come back and tell your mom she’s welcome to join in anytime!</p>
<p>I have taken to making a list (finally) of all the stuff to get for school. Let’s just say that the older D comes by her ADD very legitimately. My sister said to wait until we see the room and not buy anything that requires measuring without actually measuring like a carpet. So it seems we’ll be trekking to the “big city” after we arrive. </p>
<p>Also, son took the alcohol.edu (1st part) and scored a 93%. He said it was his first college “A.” Gotta love his sense of humor. Meanwhile, all that I could think was what was in the 7% that he missed!!! And why doesn’t he know it?!? I am letting go though… (and if you haven’t read that book, it’s really worth the read.)</p>
<p>Hi All…back in state. Crazy week. Got D2 moved in to her on-campus apartment. It is lovely and lots of room.The housing here is incredible! She started regular pre-season and is much happier! There were still some tears but not when we left today. Life is certainly a roller coaster!!! I know there will be more ups and downs but at least she didn’t ask to come home with us! The adjustment for our quiet princess will continue but at least she is working hard and crying less! She also feels better now that coaches are monitoring activities. We were thrilled to hear that she finished in the top of the fitness tests as it seemed to calm her. H thinks some of the upperclass players are threatened by the new recruiting class and that all will work out in the end. I just hate it that so many women can’t/won’t be supportive of each other. Now that D2 is in her own place she is more relaxed and happy to be away from situations that she isn’t prepared to handle at this time. Will have to work on this with her.
Thanks so much for all of your support and prayers for the passing of my stepfather. I am terrible at this. My eyes have been swollen shut and my puffy face tells everyone of my grief and empty nest. Thanks for being there my friends!</p>
<p>So D and I were watching tv and the commercial for GI Joe came on. She wondered if the GI joe in the movie was more “equiped” than the doll was!!</p>
<p>We are now sorting scarves, jewelry and belts. Plan is to sort one type of apparel a night. Sigh.</p>
<p>Went to dinner with husband and had so many leftovers. Brought home for D and realized that in a few weeks, she won’t be there to eat!!</p>
<p>Went shopping and bought new guest towels, as her bathroom is the “house” bathroom. Hiding them. Also, rearranging older Ds room- found some amazing storage stuff for my arts and crafts. </p>
<p>Someday my housewill be back to non-chaotic!!</p>
<p>That’s all such good news NMn… well, not the grief, but hopefully you do feel supported. It’s a lot on your plate for sure. </p>
<p>So… you guys know those alcoholU courses or whatever that they have kids take? Did you son/daughter’s school make available to you a parent version? Well, S’s school did and so I have spent the better part of an hour reading and taking various quizzes etc. I imagine it’s so I know what information is being relayed to my kid, but if you have done it, can I ask your opinion? While I haven’t finished it yet, I am definitely on the fence whether I think it’s good vs. will kids attune to the delivery. Just wondering what the viewpoints were. Maybe I should post as a new thread on the main page?</p>
<p>ILovetoquilt: That’s the beauty of a daughter, they actually like to go through their stuff and clean it out. Perfect activity for lots of long talks. My younger D is in a non-sharing phase, but my oldest was always a willing open book. You just had to start by turning a page (or cleaning out a drawer, as the case may be).</p>
<p>Tomorrow we leave to take D1 to grad school and a week away. We come back as a threesome – and 3 days later D2 is off to college. And we come back … as a twosome. Wow.</p>
<p>D2 and I took a walk up to her old elementary school this evening; she said she has great memories of it; seems long ago now and almost like yesterday. Time and tide wait for no one!</p>
<p>So true! It was a big adjustment when D left for college 3 years ago – made more so by us moving and S starting as a sophomore at a new HS, all at the same time. Now with him leaving, it’s going to be HUGE! For one thing, I can stop buying milk by the gallon! I hope H & I still like each other!!!</p>
<p>I woke up this morning and a lightbulb went on. I realized that for the last several years and this past one especially, we’ve all been planning for this upcoming adventure. We’ve encouraged and counseled, been there to listen, prod and cajole. We sat there with wringing hands waiting and wondering to where our kids would fly off to and have helped them prepare in countless ways. We’ve been there for the whole thing and now that it’s time to go on this adventure, we’re not going. We’ve all said how it’d be fun to go to college again and take the classes, meet the people etc, but of course we can’t. </p>
<p>I have spent a good amount of time helping S research schools, programs and possibilities and now he gets to go off and imagine a new life while mine only gets a little less busy and a lot less new. I wonder what I will do with all the time spent. But mostly I see how this trip into the unknown, the adventure of a lifetime, is going to happen with me not going anywhere. It’s not that I begrudge it in the least and of course I am so excited for all that awaits my son on the other side of that cross-country flight. It’s just that, while I don’t want to pop any bubbles and fully understand my place in his journey, I still wish I could go too. Not to be with him or near him, but to have an adventure of my own. All that time and energy, planning and encouraging, just to say Goodbye, is a little hard on the heart.</p>
<p>I spent the day irritated at Son…the going to bed at 4 am and getting up at 1 pm does not work well with a getting things done on the last Saturday schedule. Just when I thought we’ve have some time, he and H went to see Harry Potter. (H can’t see the *Harry Potter *movies without Son because he relies on him to fill him in on missing characters, things he misses, etc.)</p>
<p>The reality of having other children to focus on is rearing its heard - D16 got an email from her GC saying drill team (two of her classes and her main EC and passion) conflicts with her foreign language class (the third year). I’ve investigated and have found an on-line class. She can take it on-line, or just be one of those kids with two years of the same foreign language…only she really wanted to take it all four years…We have two days before schedule pick-up to figure this out.</p>
<p>NM, I admit that that line made me laugh…heaven forbid that any of us get good at sending a child to college and losing a parent at the same time! The fact that you’re able to get out of bed and turn on your computer says you’re handling it all just fine.</p>
<p>Modadunn, that is exactly the way I feel - thank you so much for putting it out there. My second and last child will soon be off to college, and I know it will be very difficult for so many reasons - thank you for expressing so many of them so well and letting me know that I am not the only one that feels that way. As my S would say, I need a new project, which may be true, but it is goes so much deeper than that.</p>
<p>NM–I’m glad you’re back. I’ve been thinking about you for the last few days. One bit of advice. I lost my grandfather a few weeks before I left for college. It was the first death I experienced. I know you will, but please encourage your DD to speak to someone, an RA or coach, or a new friend, if she feels some grief or just needs to talk about the man. I vividly recall at some point in dealing with all the newness of college it was hard to express the grief I was still feeling. Once I let my RA know what had happened she was very supportive, and it just felt good to talk about him sometimes. I’m glad to read your D is happier this week! </p>
<p>We’re off today for a quick trip out of town to see a baseball game and enjoy some time together as a family. I hope it’s not our last family trip, but I know the next time we get away together the dynamics will be different. </p>
It’s only now as I send my oldest child off to college I realize all I didn’t know when I was a first generation student. I wish the internet had existed then. If you get into a bind at some point, feel free to come on back. </p>