D has always planned to leave here and live in a big city. But when we were talking about possibly moving the other day, she got very upset.
I can easily see my son heading off to college and returning right back to his bedroom 4 years later. Part of this might be cultural, however, in that my husband is Turkish and in his culture, kids live with their parents until they get married and then some still stay at home to take care of the parents. Nobody would dream of ever leaving home without a spouse. This is true even though my husband left home to work abroad for 9 years. When he returned back to his country he moved right back into his parentās house. Then I showed up 2 months later, got married, and ended up living with all of them - a long and miserable storyā¦
Anyway I digress.
I keep telling my son that since our retirement will end up as his college tuition, I hope that when he moves out into his own house he leaves a place in the basement for my and my husband to move intoā¦I am jokingā¦sort of.
Iām thankful it is a new day. Called FAFSA again this morning re: filing for 10+ schools. The rep I got today said that the submitted info will still be accessible to the first batch of schools even after weāve submitted it to the second batch of schools. She had to put me on hold to check with someone, just like the rep I spoke to yesterday. I sure hope her answer is accurate.
She did say that once we have our actual tax info to upload, to make sure we do it in reverse - submit it to the current list (2nd batch), wait 3-5 days for it to be processed, then go back in to delete those schools, add in the first 10 schools, and upload tax info again.
Re: the Berkeley alumni scholarships, Ms. Sun posted this today: āIf you receive an invitation to apply for alumni scholarships, please note that the alumni associations obtain the contact information and general profile of applicants from the admissions office and send out invitations based on criteria the alumni associations determined to reflect the type of students they want for the scholarships. The process is separate from admission evaluation as the alumni associations are different entities (typically they are set up as a nonprofit loosely affiliated with the university). Receiving an invitation has no bearing on your admission status and you may apply for the scholarships regardless of whether you received an invitation (for the UCs that have a scholarship application process that is open to everyone).ā
So it seems that an invitation to apply can be seen as an encouraging sign, even if itās a separate process from admissions. 
We completely expected DS to go to school for 4 years & then return home & commute into NYC. Well he is now a junior in college, goes to school in DC, spent last summer in DC in an internship, is now in Ireland doing an internship, & has asked when are we going to turn his āoldā room into an office? Insert knife into heart & turn itā¦ I know this is how it is supposed to happen. That we are supposed to raise them to take care of themselves & leave the nest, just thought I had a little more timeā¦
So we will see what DD will do. DH is hoping she chooses the school that is 1 1/2 hrs from us.
@EastGrad I know itās hitting me!
I do think most of the chance me posts are not useful and are just kids looking for positive affirmation when they are worried and stressed. SO no problem in my mind having strangers tell them they are awesome if it makes them feel better. I do think in some cases they are helpful when some kids are way over estimating how holistic admissions workāie I have a GPA and test scores way below the 25% but Iām really cool wonāt I get in all these great places. Good for them to be reminded about the need for safety schools.
@LKnomad if I had to live with my in-laws other than VERY short visits I would not be married! Itās been four years since weāve seen them and theyāll be coming for DD graduation (staying at our house) SIL is coming too. My mom and sister will be coming too. They all live out of state and all will be stay in our house. It will be the first time they we be together since D16 was born. Hotels are not an option, we live in the sticks and the few hotels here are already booked MIL has already checked even before she knew my mother was coming.
My kids know they are always welcome home but before they married they really need to be able to support themselves.
Back from the crazy three day bicoastal college tour. Arrived home at 4 AM Wednesday to various bits of chaos, including speaking with the board of the charter school about various high school issues at noon, and an Ivy interview for D at 5 PM that same dayā¦after ski practice and teaching skate class! I donāt think I have slept more than 4 consecutive hours all week.
I talked about the first school already. The second school was a West Coast science school to which I know some of the other kids here have applied as well. We saw a coyote casually wandering that campus. D16 had a love at first sight moment with the campus, which is quite unusual for her skeptical self, and became further enamored throughout the tour. I had to laugh at the guideās description of the dorm social life: āSome dorms only party on Fridays and others party every night.ā Well, okay then, nice to have diverse options 
I do find that for me, I fall in love with each school while Iām there. An e mail can ignite the affection too. Itās a bit like The Bachelor, and I wish D16 could offer a rose to them all, LOL!! Hopefully there will be no sobbing at the final rose ceremony
Oh, and she got an e mail notification of acceptance to honors at University of Kentucky today. First offer of honors anywhere, so pretty neat. We still need to visit that one.
Okay, now for commentary on the weekās posts:
I had not heard of SAT templates, but it sounds like something that would have been helpful. The essay was definitely my daughterās weak spot on the SAT.
Welcome @frenchtoastlover and @mom23travelers!
@MuggleMom , re: the letdowns, well, luckily (for lack of a better word) D has had a lot of practice dealing with disappointments through the years. Sheās a hard worker, has a lot of diverse interests, but rarely seems to be the top kid at whatever it is she is doing at any given time. These things do bother her at the time, but she tends to just go on to the next thing. I try to emphasize the value in the process, as opposed to the value of the āwinā. Maybe that helps her, but I imagine she tunes out my philosophizing much of the time
As far as the admission process, I see it a bit as casting a play. They need to fill all the parts. Sometimes the more talented person will be needed in what seems to be a less significant role, but may be more technically challenging. Sometimes you need someone with a particular look. OFTEN, there is politics involved. There is usually more talent than a director can use. Disappointment is inevitable.
@Ballerina016, I feel so badly about your daughterās experience with the college consultant. It sounds to me that the woman probably didnāt understand the reality of lottery school admission so much, and was trying to save face after her predictions did not come to pass. Your daughterās accomplishments are wonderful, and I still think she will be admitted in regular decision season. I suspect that being from California, with all the talent there, is probably one of the bigger factors in the schools wanting to wait on her decision.
@petrichor11, that is GREAT news about Florida A&M!! So is she going to retake the ACT? Oh, nevermind, just read further, I see that is a āprobably notā
I actually enjoy the college/major discussion, but around here no one asks!
@LKnomad, I am HORRIFIED by the verification situation with your son. This is beyond stupid. Poor guy, it was bad enough to go through the Science Fair disappointment the first time. Um, yes, moving in with the in-laws sounds like a stressful way to begin a marriage! Iāve been following the bombing in Istanbul this week. Hopefully you did not have any family impacted. We were in that tourist area just last year.
@happymochi , I was debating the ādeleting schools to make room for the new onesā FAFSA timeline just last night, and came to the conclusion that I could go ahead and do it once the SAR came in. Hopefully my interpretation was correct.
@DAPIStained , I changed my name once for a bit more anonymity too! My daughter will occasionally read college-specific posts (usually because I call her attention to them.) Sheās not a big internet forum person though. I hope your daughter has good success with her upcoming interviews and decisions.
Iām pretty sure D is stalking my posts here on CC. :-h Hi honey!
Hi @Undercovermom1 's D! Congrats on your acceptances.
This week I have done something not many CC kids probably do- I got a math tutor. Itās not easy for me to ask for academic help but I have the NYS Regents in Alegebra 2/Trig 2 weeks from today and itās hard and my teachers(itās a slower, 1.5 year version of the course) havenāt been very good. So a former student who is now a junior math major is tutoring me through next week and itās really helping.
Soā¦this was funā¦I actually received MY first college acceptance to our state university! I grew up in a tough environment and was not able to go to college a hundred years ago. Even though I have two other college tuitions to pay for this upcoming year, I have been slowly plugging away at the community college and will be graduating hopefully with a 4.0 GPA the end of spring. I never would have passed college with a 2.0 back in the day. I was too busy trying to figure out how to eat. Stuff like that sucks up the energy for sure.
Today, I got accepted to state u to continue on to my four year degree. I am considering a Business Analytics degree because I actually love computers/info gathering and business seems a smart idea. The only thing I am concerned about is that I am a middle aged person competing for jobs that super smart younguns who love computers will also be in line to secure. I dont know if I am overkilling it? But a regular business management degree seems so boring, and I was advised to gain a specialty. I also dont like marketing or accounting. My other option is to go for an āinfomatics/information technology degreeā (library sciences type degree) as I will graduate with my business associates. However, I am afraid the jobs will really be scarce in that area, and with the business degree, I donāt necessarily have to get an analyst job even thought that is somewhat what I want. Thoughts anyone?
Either way, I am ecstatic to have risen from the place I was in high school to now. Except I do need a job HA!
@cakeisgreat Congratulations.
I donāt think it should matter that you are going to be competing with super smart youngāuns. Study what you are interested in and not worry about the competition. There are always people out there looking for maturity and dependability which older people offer and very much needed in the established businesses.
DD is waiting for her alumni interviewer. He is 20 minute late already. What is the polite way to follow up? Should she call him in a few minutes?
@readingclaygirl I got my son a math tutor the summer before junior year. He was going to be taking 2 math classes and was dreading it. The tutor helped him get a head start and it really built up his confidence. I kept the tutor to help with SAT prep too. It was definitely worth it.
@Ballerina016 I would text them at the half hour mark if she has the cell number. Before I do that, I would double check the emails to make sure the date and time are right. Tell her not to be nervous or worry. if something came up, she was in the right place at the right time. It will all work out.
@cakeisgreat Congratulations! @RyanG1207 My confidence level has skyrocketed. And hopefully my grade will reflect that.
@readingclaygirl There is nothing wrong with asking for help. If you know you need it and you donāt ask, well that would be a problem. When I toured schools with my son, one thing I noticed was that even at the most selective schools, students talked about tutoring. We went to one very very selective STEM school and the tour guide talked about how it was not uncommon for students to spend hours helping fellow students who were having trouble understanding concepts. This was something that struck my son and he actually wrote about it in one of his essays.
No shame is needing help. We do not exist in a vacuum and working with others is necessary. One day you might find yourself in the tutor position with something you are strong in.
@readingclaygirl Good for you! Thatās a very smart thing to do. Sometimes people get too far down a hole before they ask for help.
@cakeisgreat Way to go!!! Good luck on your next adventure.
@Ballerina016, did he show up? I do think she should call, as perhaps there was a mixup on meeting spot.
@readingclaygirl, my older daughter, already in college, uses tutors regularly. They are very helpful.
Congats @cakeisgreat! Sounds like big things ahead!