@Skates76, yes there is an online option, but for some reason it didn’t work.
Anyway I will get it done just like every year.
@nubble16 What makes the school 3 1/2 hrs away a “fantastic” fit? It seems to me if your daughter prefers to be closer to home , that does not make it "fantastic " I agree with @sseamom that there is no “perfect” school for students. I commend your daughter for feeling comfortable end out to tell you her concerns. Good luck with your decision.
When it came down to the final two schools for D16, I do think that distance played a large role in her choice. The one she chose is slightly less than a two hour car ride from home, the runner up is a little over a two hour flight from home, and of course though the flights are all direct ones since it is a popular resort city, it is still a flight. I think what crystallized for her is that she can do this thing in steps because she definitely plans on seeking a graduate or professional degree. She felt that taking the smaller, but far enough step away from home was a better choice as an undergrad as she transitions to adulthood, and is already compiling a list of prospective med schools to research and target, with some of them really far away, though a few close ones too. Her thought was that in four years she will be more mature, more independent and will have no real limits as to where she might go, plus her younger brother will be older and on the verge of going away to school by then too. I can’t argue with her logic and measured approach to the distance issue. Some of her airplane schools are already on her list for post-UG consideration, so the trips were really valuable that way too.
Hi all,
I mostly lurk on this thread, but I find myself aboard the S.S. Indecision with all the rest! D16 is choosing between two of our state universities and a LAC in another state. Several other LACs have been considered and eliminated. The choices are very different and cost is a consideration. Not easy. She was a finalist but was not chosen for a full ride at her first choice LAC very late in the game. Tough loss there, but we are coming around to making a choice from the excellent schools still on the table. It just may take all the way until May 1.
@nubble16 My D’14 is a homebody who went far away (that same 3 1/2 hour plane ride) to college. In her case, her first choice of major was not available nearby. We did have a family member in the same area as the distant school. It has worked out great for her, but the distance was hard at first. In the conversation we had leading up to her choice of school, a mentor encouraged her take the plunge and to go to the distant school, and plan to stick it out for a year. The reasoning was that the local option would still be there in a year providing her grades were good, and that a year would give her time to fully adjust to being away and keep her from making a premature decision to come home as soon as homesickness hit. She’s finishing her second year there now. She did not come home last summer (internship with a nonprofit in another state) and is not coming home this summer either (a paid internship in her field this time). She’s doing well and loves her school. This is a personal decision. We know others whose kids have stayed close to home and also had a great, and growing experience.
@carolinamom2boys Well maybe fantastic is a poor choice of words given my daughters hesitation on proximity to home. That seems to be the only downside for her right now and I agree it is a big one. The size of the school, the programs and support, and the student body are a great fit for her. She still has an admitted student day next week at the school that is an hour from home. I am hoping she will be closer to a decision after that. Both are good options. It is hard to come to the end of this journey and still not be completely sure. Just feeling big. Thank you for your input.
@nubble16 We are having similar conversations with my S. His top school is a 2.5 hour plane ride. The other two top contenders are a one hour ride and a 5.5 hour ride. His sister went to the same school that is a plane ride away. She got immersed immediately, called a little hesitant maybe twice the first few weeks and then clearly found her home. Once, sophomore year, she called and said she wanted to come home for a long weekend and we made it happen. I don’t think it was truly homesickness - she had gotten a high up volunteer position for a huge campus event. It was taking a lot of time and everyone else was a senior while she was a sophomore. She just needed a time out to come home and regroup from that pressure. After that, I could hardly get her to come home. LOL She had a fantastic college experience.
I’ve told my S that if he selects the further school, since he is our youngest, we can visit twice this fall instead of once for Parent’s weekend but that no matter which school he selects, he is unlikely to come home more frequently once he is involved with campus life. The only exception is the one hour school where he would have the option to come home for the Jewish Holidays (something he could do for a day or part of a day). He is mulling all this over. I will say that he is my introverted kid and a year younger than my D was when she left for college but that I am not worrying about the distance probably because I know this school well enough that I’m sure he will find his social fit there.
Try talking to your D about your D’s specific concerns. Distance is definitely something to consider. Has your D ever spent time away from home before? I like the approach that @Parentof2014grad wrote of trying the further away college for a year. I’ve been thinking about this for my S before I even read it here and may make that recommendation at some point since he seems leaning toward that school but won’t actually make a decision. And, there are lots of ways to keep in touch - calling, Skype, texting, etc. My D was not great at that, I had to prod her to call once a week. It was probably a good sign that she was fine and learning to take care of herself. S will be getting a lecture before he leaves for any college that he need to touch base at least once a week as he hardly answers texts now. LOL Maybe have a conversation with your D about how you will keep in touch while she is away - at any of the colleges. How often does she envision speaking to you, texting, etc? You might also remind her that while of course, she is always welcome home, her high school friends will also be away and coming home will be more about family than reconnecting with the social life she has before. My D is still close with her HS friends but they are spread out now - and they were during college - and their visits home rarely overlap. So coming home won’t be like things are now.
Happy to be off the ship SS Indecision!!
After a crazy round of hitting accepted candidates days, and driving through one other potential this past weekend my S has decided to attend RIT.
Despite his strong desire to continue his marching band career at the collegiate level the combination of Honors, plus a decent scholarship package and the academic offerings of RIT won him over. He admitted he really liked the school when were there a couple of weeks ago, but the lack of band was holding him back.
Our visits to the other potentials (all three were similar size, or larger public institutions) help him realize just how comfortable he felt at RIT.
One of the other potentials (Pitt) was knocked off when a presenter mentioned that if kids were interested in aerospace engineering (which my son is) that Pitt was “not the school for them.” Otherwise, I think it might have been a stronger contender.
The other two schools, one of which I thought might be a better fit, wound up just being to large (campus size) for his comfort zone.
I think it helped that he spent time in the each of the schools’ social media groups. It definitely gave each school a unique vibe. One group he didn’t care for at all. The other two he liked, but the feel he got from the other students at RIT helped cement the decision.
We, as parents, love the guaranteed/required year’s paid co-op program, the ability to graduate in 5 years with a combined BS/MS degree, and the financials for us are fantastic.
Congrats to everyone else who has disembarked, and good luck to those still sailing. It’s been great to catch up with the latest news from the last several days.
My D15 went 2 hours drive away. D16 is going 2.5 hours flight away.
I love that 2 hours drive distance. We can drive down after work, take her out to dinner and drive home. We’ve only done it once all year but knowing that we can has made all the difference for all of us. When she left H said to her, “You can come home any weekend you want to, but you can’t come home all of them.” She has never come home for a random weekend but again it helps to know that she can.
H tells me that with D16 she can come home when she wants to or we can visit. But a plane flight just adds so much more time and money to the mix it realistically won’t be done casually.
Tons have kids have excellent results staying close by at the less desirable school and tons of kids have excellent results a plane ride away. You have to know your kid and make your best guess.
I do think that the best chance of excellent results are with your child making the choice. She’s the one who has to live most intimately with the results. I wouldn’t push too hard either way, just help her think through the choice.
Just a word of caution regarding “trying a school for a year.” If your student is dependent on scholarships to attend school, please realize that scholarships to transfer students are usually not as available as freshman scholarships, and that money offered to your student as a freshman will most likely not be available as a sophmore .
@mom23travelers thank you. I trust her and will listen carefully.
@dbjs70 Congratulations on docking! RIT is a really awesome school and I love the student body. As a grad student at U of Rochester I had a lot of opportunities to interact with RIT students in the community, seminars, etc, great vibe from those kids. Great choice (-:
The social media groups really can play a big role in finding someone’s people. The school D chose had several very active FB groups and she felt really comfortable, especially with the kids in the Honors group. Her other favorite, despite being a much larger school, had very little in the way of school or student/applicant social media groups or presence, and as a more distant school, her not being able to interact with other incoming students that way left a big hole in that school’s resume, so to speak.
Regarding distance- my chosen college is 45 minutes from home. I don’t think I could go much further-I’m a total homebody. This might sound strange but my mom told us she didn’t want us more than 2 hours from home. My sister is going just about 2.
Cheehoo @dbjs70 !! I think RIT has a lot going for it, and I’m so glad he found his college home. 
Congrats on RIT @dbjs70! DH has co-workers that are grads. They speak very highly of their education.
@Skates76, congrats on U Del.
It was one of my S’ potentials, but knocked off the list (much to my in-laws chagrin as they are both alums) early because he didn’t like the campus. I think, too, he didn’t want to be that close to home. That said, he did like what he heard about the engineering programs/study abroad opportunities. It’s a great school.
@bookmom7, @Skates76 and @palm715 - thanks for the good words about the school. It’s certainly doesn’t see a lot of action on here, but it managed to sell all of us. It’s a bit of a sleeper I think - everyone seems to think highly of it.
Turns out a friend of ours graduated from RIT (he never let on as did his in laws). Of course they have good things to say too. A friend of mine from HS went to U of Rochester and liked it, and had my wife not gotten into her first choice (which was ED), RIT was on her list. Ahh, the irony.
I can’t wait to go to Nick Tahou’s on a future visit.
@dbjs70 Just remember, it isn’t really a visit to Nick’s if you are going before midnight (-;
RIT really is one of those quiet gems, which pretty much matches up with the kids I knew from there. All very bright, but also very congenial and service oriented, very regular, energetic kids who happen to be really smart.
D is going to be majoring in a fairly unique program at UDel which was one of its strong points (though she raves about the study abroad options during their winter terms). It is called Medical Diagnostics, which is essentially Medical Laboratory Sciences, formerly known as Medical Technology back when it was my major in the stone ages, that has been adapted to produce pre-Physician Assistant and pre-Med candidates. They take all of the classroom work in the various clinical laboratory diagnostics disciplines, along with the supporting bio and chem classes, but in place of the clinical laboratory practicums and off-site clinical lab rotations, they use that extra time to fulfill their pre-professional school pre-reqs and patient contact hours.
For a long time I advocated to my D that my old major was a great pre-Med major, but she didn’t want to spend almost a full year in the clinical rotations since she does not plan on entering the field after UG, so the program at UD is perfect for her (and Dad). She loves the clinical focus of the lecture curriculum and how advanced she will be in many disciplines once she gets to med school compared to students without that kind of clinical background, while still filling up on needed pre-reqs and likely picking up a minor in forensic sciences. They said they started this new program five years ago after working informally to help kids in their MLS program prepare for med school, and finally decided to parlay the strengths of that program into true pre-professional track. She is very stoked about it!
@dbjs70 Congrats on RIT! Funny, I have been discussing RIT over the last few weeks with a coworker whose daughter is a freshman there. Her daughter is hearing impaired and receives great support services through the school. Her daughter has also been able to connect with students like herself and it has made a huge difference for her.
Loving the love for RIT, @dbjs70 @Skates76 @palm715 and @RyanG1207 . That’s where S14 chose to go, though he had higher ranked options. He has thrived with a student body that shares his interests. Before he made the decision I heard from a number of colleagues that mentored RIT students for co-op (required for many majors). The colleagues had only good things to say about the students and their professionalism.
Well my D has now revisited her top two schools and still can’t decide. I really don’t think she can go wrong so I’m not too worried - I’d just like it to be over so we can make plans!
@dbjs70 Congrats on RIT! One of my D’s best friends from childhood did the 5 year program and had a great experience there. She also met her (now) husband when they were both freshman. We toured RIT and UR last summer. We were impressed with both schools for different reasons. My S chose not to apply to RIT but we thought it had a lot to offer.
@AnxietyAttack77 We are in a similar situation. We visited two more schools this weekend and S eliminated one. I thought that put us down to three but there are two others he mentioned last night. Arghh. I’m hoping it was a case of just not being ready to let go as the other three seem to have so much more in a lot of areas and I truly don’t know how he is going to pick from those three. Putting two more back in is not good.