@dfbdfb - My DD used a fee waiver that also did not go through automatically. She had to call the school and email the admissions office the email she had received from them with the waiver. In her case, I think that the diversity recruitment office did not communicate with the admissions office. Good Luck
** QQTD ** We will be full pay, unless he can get scholarships. Two of his schools cost a bit more than I’m comfortable with paying, but we will see, they are OOS public schools. Hoping he gets better options. Having done this before I know without running the FAFSA that S17 won’t qualify for anything other than loans and he’s unlikely to get work study. I would rather he not take any loans if it’s not necessary. I will still do the FAFSA because I know to get any merit money we will still need to do this.
As to working, he is hoping to work this summer but that won’t pay much. I don’t want him to work (unless it was work study) the first semester/quarter. Too much stress in just learning how college works, being away from home, to add one more thing in the mix. Theoretically I think it’s a good idea to have a part time job, and would support him dong this after that. I would love to seem him take advantage with campus activities and focus on his academics. Not sure a job is going to make enough $$ to offset the stress of a job on top of that.
S17 is very frugal so I’m not too worried about things. He is very concerned about college costs.
Ditch Day: Is in the SPRING. Never heard of Ditch day in the fall.
STRESS: Yup S17 didn’t get in the EA he promised last night & I think it’s due to stress. We will see if he gets it in tonight. (He won’t be home till at least 10pm) It’s Early Action, he can still apply and he did get once application in last week. So I’m just not going to make a big deal of it tonight.
Especially for schools that require two LoRs and multiple essays! [-(
QOTD: Skin in the game
Right now the only significant “skin” is ours…
We are paying OOS tuition/room/board/books for DS14. He has a scholarship from DH’s employer that covers about 1/3 of the cost, and had a 1-year scholarship from his school his freshman year. He works during the summer and is responsible for his own living expenses (e.g., eating out, activities, extra supplies, etc.). He will graduate debt free if all goes as planned. Grad school, if he goes that route, is on him … find a way to get himself funded, or take out loans, or get a job with a company that will eventually send him.
DD17 is chasing undergrad merit $ because she believes she wants to be a vet, and we’ve told her if she saves us $ undergrad, we can help with vet school. She will also qualify for DH’s employer scholarship. She already knows that it is financial suicide to take out loans for 4 years of OOS vet school, and we cannot fund that; she’s already of the mindset that vet school will only happen if she gets into our in-state option. If she doesn’t, then she’ll work and apply again … or not … depending on how she feels about it once she gets there. If she decides she loves something else in the mean time, then more power to her. IF that happens, and we end up not really paying much of anything for her undergrad and she doesn’t do grad school or has that funded, then we’ve already discussed that $ being available to help her with a first house. Same won’t be true for DS, and he understands that.
@curiositycat333, My D15 was offered work study (along with loans) and we were full pay according to FAFSA and the CSS. So maybe your S will have the WS option.
@curiositycat333 our S11 was also offered Work Study and we were full pay for him.
I have discovered that refreshing the LOR page on Naviance is like pushing the elevator button. It doesn’t make the desired object arrive any faster. =))
@pittsburghscribe — Re: Tulane large envelope. Could be large merit aid award letter. Older son received Tulane decision via their online system, but large envelope arrived a few days later with $$ and honors college info.
Had to skim 75 posts. Will return later tonight. Busy day here!
@CT1417 awesome and congrats! One of Ds friends was beyond excited to get her Tulane acceptance also. Idk about the merit-- d has limits to how much noseyness she will let me get by with!
I will always view Tulane as one of the ones that ‘got away’. Good luck, @pittsburghscribe!
@hadmeathello wrote
Yes, but it takes on a different meaning for each school and each situation. We have X amount of dollars saved (and we can contribute X per year on top of that divided by 2 kids)-how she wants to disburse that is up to her. She could go to UA and use all of X for graduate school (and her skin in the game is getting the great test scores and the presidential), or she could go to her lottery school and be full pay, and it’d be X+ loans for her for undergrad. Her skin in the game there is getting in. The ones in the middle are all various permutations of money, co-oops, and merit with a skin ratio varying somewhat.
Ivies-she didn’t apply to any, no interest. We’ve rubbed elbows with some super wealthy people, and the rich are different than you and I. In ways that I can’t even being to describe, but are not surmountable (by choice or by ability) from the upper middle class. I’ve said it before that I am very hesitant to let my Eliza Doolittle hang out with trustfundians, and she seems more meritocracy-oriented, anyway, so that’s a win/win for us for where she wanted to apply.
@mamaedefamilia wrote
Did you try holding the button down? 
Did we just have a streaker?
Skin in the game: We plan to pay for college for both of ours so they won’t have to take out loans. We’re fortunate our oldest treats his scholarship as if it’s his own money and works really hard to keep it. I expect the one that will be entering in the fall will do the same.
Ivy: Interesting that others also have a relative that will pay the application fee to see if the kid gets in. Ours was going to apply to one, but then decided not to because it seemed like a lot of effort for something he didn’t feel strongly about.
QOTD - My D’s skin in the game is working her tail off for 4 years so that she can go to college for free and working her tail off in college to make the most of her opportunities. Even if we hadn’t been so lucky, I’m against loans for loans sake, so D would not have had to take out loans or work (except internships). I would have just paid within the budget that I gave her, and she fully understood that and would have gone where that budget works. Thankfully, there’s never been a dream school as I discouraged that kind of thinking from a very young age.
So D thought about adding a fourth school as EA. It would be her only CA school so she started the CA process and added the school. After realizing the work to do CA for one school (LOR, another App, another Essay) and researching the school a little further (guaranteed merit aid for EA was not that generous for her stats) she decided it was not worth the effort.
So D receives a hand written note from the AO thanking her for considering their school and offering to help her with the CA process. Now D feels bad she “lead the school” on by starting a CA she didn’t finish. I guess she needs a few rejections to toughen her up 
Skin in the game:
Me 5 years ago:
“She can do like I did and pay for her own college, including loans. It was a great experience, made me work hard and made me own the process.”
Me 3 years ago: “We can pay for some of it sweetie. Sure…Tufts and Boston U look amazing since I know you love Boston. You should APPLY…you can get a scholarship!”
Me last year: “Crap–what the ??? Our EFC??? ohmyword we do not have that. Is that every YEAR??”
Me late last year: “honey—your part of the contribution is taking the ACT again. And maybe one more time.”
Me this year: “honey, you have worked your tail off. If you get full-tuition anywhere we’ve got the rest and you can even not work all of next summer—you’ve earned a break!”
Clearly I have waffled as I have learned. I’m all about kids being vested in the process. Her work to get her score into merit aid is seriously in my head, part of her being IN the game.
Will we take out the minimum Stafford loan? Yeah maybe. Life as of late in the past 5 years has taught us that jobs disappear overnight and we just can’t predict what will happen. Would probably be good to at least have it on hand and we would no doubt be the softies we are and would pay a lot of it off for her.
She works now to earn her spending $$. I predict after a brief time off to rest next summer and next fall she will want to work a little while in school. We’ll see. She knows the value of putting in the time for sure and she doesn’t take any of it for granted. Love that kid!
Ok, I’ve given up trying to figure this out. Why are people “jailed”? Is it for forum violations? Is there a sentence served, with time off for good behavior? I find this all very confusing.
I guess I will accept ‘hard work’ as ‘skin in the game’, but I think my kid would have done the hard work anyway…for herself. But, as someone mentioned earlier, I don’t think my D has an appropriate appreciation for the value of a dollar. You guys whose kids held jobs during HS were smart/fortunate! That’s what I would do differently. Sorry D20!
@SincererLove I feel like I need a valium before opening the grade portal for DD20.
@NerdMom88 If you read the Terms of Service, you will get an idea of what ‘not’ to do. Or, watch the movie Stepford Wives or Soylent Green.