@traveler98 it’s easy you can do it on line.
@swtaffy904 I totally agree with @bearcatfan. Just tell your D, great start, now you just have to turn this around to show how you grew. And leave it at that. I was too detailed with my D about what I didn’t like about her essay, and I really, really hurt her feelings. She took it way too personally, because this essay IS personal. The kids are writing their deepest feelings and pouring their hearts out.
@crazy4info I have to admit that the standardizing of estimating methods created a lot of confusion in my household even though it didn’t have too. “Compatible numbers”, “rounding”, etc, etc all make it sound/feel very mechanical and reproducible, but estimating ends up somewhat as an art vs a precise operation.
If you had a “6 x 16” case, would you know to change it to “5 x 20”? would you be brave enough to transform into “10 x 10”? Would it be precise enough to know that it is less than “6 x 20” and greater than “5 x 16”? Is it even correct to consider using “5 times something” as compatible numbers? (I know the answer is yes, but it’s only if they are already comfortable with all forms of “5 times” multiplication) And then getting graded on it… it’s a tough task for everyone including teachers, at least in our experience. Perhaps the material has improved over the years, but I could not see the learning pathway in my kids’ lessons.
The problem became: sometimes estimating correctly took as much effort as getting the exact answer, so what’s the point? (I know the usefulness, but it was hard convincing the kids of this)
My S’s preciseness gets him into trouble when it’s time to estimate, even on quick things like crowd size. Were there about a hundred people there? A thousand? A dozen? Estimating percentages based on observation gives him a bit of trouble too. Did half the class raise their hands when the teacher asked that question? More than half? Less than half? He has to think hard because he doesn’t want to be wrong, but he also doesn’t seem to have been taught effective ways to estimate yet. Quickly calculating a tip in a restaurant is not his strength. Hopefully he’ll improve over time.
Thank you @bearcatfan and @melvin123. I will find a way to be supportive and not judgemental.
Thanks for sharing your experience. The last thing I want is to create a wedge or hurt her
re: the essay I really liked ■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■■ since concisely described some conclusions I had reached via other means. My S loves to write narratives but he sometimes rambles, so I was a bit worried for his essay. Something that helped me was this radio interview with Kenny G I heard a few years back, where he described how he was dealing with his son learning a musical instrument.
He described how he emphasized doing scales to his son. Only after he does a complete set would dad allow him to do his music. He then explained in detail the hows and whys and panned back to show the big picture of how one can limit their instrumental potential by not being good at scales… at an early stage in their training. Fascinating to a layman.
But what I took from that interview was not merely the knowledge of learning to play an instrument but rather a strong sense of who Kenny G was as a musician, a teacher, and a father. Having not been a fan, I took home more respect for him than I had anticipated.
The recommendations I’ve heard/seen/read regarding the college essay and how it is a conversation using your own voice really resonated with all this. Write what you know. Say it your way. Use details that explain or hint at what lies underneath. My son wrote a blurb recently about one of his outings with his classmates. It didn’t really say much at the surface, but he described what they did and how they were feeling after a long trip, and what was going on at that very moment as he wrote. But what came out was someone who enjoyed being there, enjoyed being with his friends, and enjoyed telling a story about where his meandering mind was… and you could picture him and his personality. It did go to show that perhaps writing without too much emphasis on a “goal” sometimes achieves that goal better.
I just wanted to share something really sweet. My oldest is visiting home and we were talking about D18’s packed schedule, and my worries about how she was going to find time for apps, what apps to focus on given her limited time, her chances for merit, etc. She understand we have limited resources for college and retirement, and that we are planning accordingly. But she told me that she never wanted me to worry about having enough in my old age because I could live with her and she would always take care of me. Of course I would never want to have that happen, but it was so nice to hear. :x
She was always a good kid but after she went off to college she seemed to appreciate me more. She likes to tell me I am the world’s best mom.
Maybe this will give you hope when you experience tension in your relationship during the application season.
Caveat: I might never hear that from D18, even though she’d do the same. She is kind and reliable but all business. I can’t count on too much warm and fuzzy stuff there.
I just wanted to say that the best advice we got on the essay was on our Yale tour. She said the go to essay is the “I had a problem, I overcame it, I’m so much better for it” and they get tired of seeing that. She also said they had one girl write a beautiful tribute to her Grandma and how inspiring she was - but they learned nothing about the potential student (they loved Grandma though!) My son is in the middle of his and I only know that it has something to do with his desire to play the violin at 7 and his love of politics - but other than that, we haven’t seen it yet.
I did not see D’s essay until she asked if I wanted to look, at which time it was already finished. If at all possible, I think it really helps to stay out of it and have other trusted adults look it over for feedback.
@MACmiracle, that is sweet!
After a promising start to the McDermott application S seems to have hit writers block, as several here have described for their kids. Personally I think he’s a little less interested in going through the demanding McDermott application for such a long shot, when he now knows he’s ok for the automatic NMF program at UTD. He’s struggling to start several of the essays and he’s dragging his feet on the teacher recommendation requests. I’m not going to force him to complete the application but I’ve been trying to encourage him. We’ll see what happens.
I know my D18’s essay has something to do with “none of your business. you can see it when I am done”
As I mentioned before, D and her college essays will remain a mystery to me for the rest of my life. I’m on a “need to know basis” and I don’t need to know. But I can comment on and edit all the American Government essays that I want. ^#(^
Community College here we come. <:-P :-j
@traveler98
I wondered about that McD vs. NMF conundrum, and work vs. reward.
I hope he does “tough it up” … but I am not sure that I would in his shoes.
@traveler98 my DS is the opposite he views (in his head) getting NMSF as “requirement” for McDermott. Now he feel he’s got ‘step one’ done and fired up to work on the essays and not only has he already asked his recommenders one has even already submitted!
On an unrelated note, I ran into the mom of boy that DS was close to while were homeschooling and started talking about the colleges. It’s a bit different for him because he’s homeschooling all the way through high school so he has no rank. They are limiting their search to Texas schools because they have the Texas prepaid plan. They ruled out Texas Tech because it’s too far away and UT is to close to home and too urban (not sure he’d get in). I was telling her about UTD and she was thrilled because it sounded perfect for her son, away from homebut not too far, no football was huge plus, nice dorms, new on campus appartments, he’d qualify for AES with his ACT score… Then we realized UTD doesn’t offer his major (nursing) she’s so bummed she going to try to talk him into chaning his major to something UTD offers!
@sushiritto my DD shares nothing lol. I have no say and have not seen a single essay.
@MACmiracle so sweet! My DD has said more than once “plan to live with brother” (DS 10 yrs older than DD) =))
My daughter has said she is not planning to put me in a nursing home.
The phrase “planning to” makes me a little nervous. =))
My D18 said I’m in the clear to live with her “as long as I don’t act like grandma”.
@DavidPuddy, my H and I feel the same way as you about McDermott. Sure it does sound like a stellar program, but also much more demanding than the regular honors program. Truly if it were me or my H applying, we’d both choose the NMF package and enjoy the greater flexibility. In fact after the McDermott meeting during our UTD visit, H and I privately agreed that it wasn’t something we would choose for ourselves although we both thought the honors program was great. That’s probably why we’re not pushing him at all on McDermott; it’s a big commitment and he’s really got to want that for himself. Sounds like @3scoutsmom’s S is really fired up though!
@HeliMom74 @3scoutsmom @traveler98 Thank you!!
@traveler98 - Are you in Texas? If so, your son may have filled out the registration early when he got his driver’s license. That’s what my son did and today in the mail he received the registration card showing he is all registered.
@trish02 yes, we’re in Texas. Thanks for the info; I’ll keep an eye out for that.