@jpc763 that post should be required reading for all juniors and their parents. Lots of good morals in there.
I feel like we did a lot of research on which schools potential merit might be attainable and picked schools based on that. She didn’t apply to very many and we didn’t look very hard at ones that just seemed stupid expensive. I guess I have a little FOMO now seeing everyone’s acceptances and merit. Maybe we didn’t research enough? That said, I truly believe D will do great at whichever school she ends up at. I just think it is ridiculous how much some of these schools charge.
D has decided to drop band so had her last concert the other night. It was a little bittersweet. She let her director know and he was kinda “eh” about her dropping it, didn’t even try and talk her out of it. So I guess that chapter is over now.
No big plans for us for break. Hoping D can get a few scholarship apps done that aren’t due for awhile. Might be nice to not be doing them last minute.
Great lessons @jpc763. So many parents don’t want to disappoint their kids and/or have unrealistic ideas about how much merit and need aid the schools will provide.
@jpc763 Thank you for the reminder that helps me appreciate that all the schools D is considering are affordable.
@Booajo There’s still time to submit more apps! Anyone else still working on apps this holiday vacation?
D still has several to do, including her new #1. Her last day of finals is today, then a little relaxation and then the final push. I told her to prioritize best-to-least best and if some can’t get done, then it’s fine. Just have no regrets when it’s all said and done.
What do we do now until March? I’m bored already. :-j
BTW, mid 30’s and ice on the windshield here in the SF Bay Area this morning. Kinda felt like Ann Arbor. 8-| 
I’ve learned so much here too. Even though my son only had a few schools that were fits for his major and “requirements” I can now advise my friends with younger children. I can also laugh when they say your son will get a “FREE RIDE with those grades and scores”
My simple explanation is that great numbers give your child the opportunity to be accepted into schools that meet your financial needs so if he has the numbers LOOK AT THOSE SCHOOLS first
Ugh @sushiritto please no. Actually he has to do a merit scholarship application for Wash U still, so we are still living the procrastinator’s dream here. And I am not pushing too hard on that one, because I don’t think he has any shot of getting it anyway, sigh.
I am afraid that he is going to get into some of these reachy schools, but not get the merit necessary to make them reasonable. Been there, done that with child #1 and not relishing doing it again.
OK so this is one of my favorites from @Postmodern from a post regarding parents giving their opinions to kids making their final college decisions - thought I’d share it here as it’s just so good and pretty much how I feel as well!
Ah, but the flip side of that coin is my friend’s situation: he gave his opinion on son’s school, and son went that direction. As it turns out, it probably was not the best fit. He did OK, graduated, but likely (although you can never know) would have been happier at the #2 school. My friend wishes he had not weighed in.
I will let my D decide (assuming all things being relatively equal). If she asks my opinion, I guess I’ll give it, but with the big caveat that this is her life, not mine!
Ugh you guys I feel you on the merit/cost decision woes. I think I got a bit lucky (though it didn’t feel so at the time) that my D was so apathetic about college for so long she left most of the search process in my hands. I presented her with a list of schools that I thought would meet her requirements and our budget, with a few I said I thought would probably be reaches budget-wise. She ended up axing the true budget reaches. She’s a very practical kid. If she got a mailing from a school that looked attractive to her, she would show it to me and if I said “no merit aid there” she would toss it in the trash and never think of the school again. We worked pretty well as a team finalizing her list (in hindsight, pretty sure I thought she was foot dragging at the time ). And the results have been just what we hoped, for the most part.
We did get a disappointment today. She was accepted to Univ. of Puget Sound, the last small school on her list, but they only offered her 22k/year merit. That’s the smallest award she’s been offered and it’s the most expensive COA school she applied to. We plugged the number into our spreadsheet and I think we may end up calling this one our “financial rejection”. If she loved the school above everything, we might be able to find some wiggle room, but she doesn’t. It was never near the top of her list. I suppose I can say that this means our strategy was right on target. We got the money we need at 6 out of 7 schools which is more than enough to choose from honestly.
Now, I guess she gets to move on to the fun part. Finding her final perfect place! 
Not only is it push time for scholarships and supplementals, but it’s wisdom teeth extraction time x 4. If she can actually get this stuff done and have some sort of break, it will be a miracle!!
Yes! 5 applications are planned for holiday break. The work starts tomorrow.
@1822mom My D also got into Puget Sound today, but no word on merit. She applied for a music scholarship, so apparently they hold the merit decision for the music scholarship decision. I guess that means that they don’t stack music scholarships with merit, but probably have a number in mind already and part will either be music or not. That’s frustrating.
Since her other EA school is also waiting to give merit and music scholarship info, she has 2 acceptances but no word on money at all.
@daffodilpetunia Yea, someone to commiserate with. D has 7 apps left on her list. I think the over/under line will be 4 apps and she also has one merti scholarship app to do as well.
Hey, weren’t we going to do updated odds?
I’m going to shake up the format for my D’s odds, to reflect the issues at play here:
If no additional big merit awards are offered:
UBC 70%
McGill 10%
USC 10%
Trinity 7%
ASU, UVic, Grinnell 3%
If awarded full tuition at USC (huge long shot, but hey)
USC 60%
UBC 20%
McGill 10%
Trinity 7%
ASU, UVic, Grinnell 3%
If given a major entrance scholarship at McGill (not as big a reach as USC’s scholarship, I think)
McGill 60%
UBC 20%
USC 10%
Trinity 7%
ASU, UVic, Grinnell 3%
If given the full tuition award at Trinity
I have no idea
:-j
If given multiple major scholarships
:-??
So basically, I think UBC is the one to beat, and I think big money from another school will be enough to entice her away.
D has been spending the whole day with her friend who is home from Scotland. I hear friend saying things like “I learn the most about myself when I am pushed to my absolute limits.” I love that D is hearing that voice. Go big or go home, right?
Ooh I have an opinion about opinions! Actually I think @suzy100 makes a good point about finding that balance, giving an opinion when one is asked for, but making it clear the decision is theirs. I remember very well when I had to make this decision as a 17 year old and my parents specifically refusing to advise me. They did not want to exert undue influence on my decision they said. It was actually awful for me. I was really confused and I didn’t know what to do and the people I would usually talk things out with, wouldn’t talk to me about it. I understood where they were coming from, but it was still hard. I basically ended up picking a school almost at random (I was down to 2 choices). It was a fine choice, but I don’t think I really had any great insight as to why I chose that school over the other.
So, that background in mind, I do plan to offer my D whatever insight she asks for, mostly because I think I might be incapable of stopping myself, and because she asks me and talks to me about this stuff a fair amount so it would be unnatural for me to withhold my opinions. All that said, we and she have both made it clear this is her decision. All her schools are acceptable to us so any she picks is just fine. She has told me point blank on many occasions that I don’t need to worry as she is not going to let me pick her school. ;
I guess I’ll have to trust her on that.
Definitely seeing a pattern here - my D has her consultation on Dec 28 and expect 4 wisdom teeth to be extracted shortly there after. Must be a right of passage. :((
S got his wisdom teeth out today. Tis the season I guess!
@ShrimpBurrito. Words I try to live by. 
Is UBC U of British Columbia? Also, what if USC offers a 50% (partial) scholarship? Where are those odds?
@daffodilpetunia the merit award was in the “financial aid” link at the bottom of the acceptance letter in the portal for Puget Sound. That was the first one we’ve had do it like that, there was no mention of merit in the acceptance letter at all, but she saw that link at the bottom and clicked it and there it was! I think they do stack the talent scholarships, I think one of the 2017 parents had a kid with both.
@sushiritto Yes, U British Columbia in Vancouver. Campus is on top of a cliff with spectacular views of city, mountains, and ocean, surrounded by a state park. Utopia for D.
D will already have the half tuition scholarship at USC if accepted, assuming she is named NMF. USC would not be in play at sticker price.