D20 is all settled in at law school, and now we have three days to get D24 all packed up. Luckily D24 is more of a planner than D20 - so I hope to get the car packed the night before we leave instead of running around still packing stuff at the last minute like we just did.
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We left on stage one of our two day hike down to VA - the first leg took 7 hours instead of 5 due to flash flooding in CT. Sadly, no way around it as we were coming from MA. Gearing up for final leg today. Hopefully traffic wonât be as terrible. Meanwhile, S22 has first day of classes today - can hardly believe it. Good luck to everyone and their kiddos!
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We had a welcome picnic at D25âs new school yesterday and thought of you guys as I was beginning to hear tidbits on the college pulse. Of note, students are capped at applying to 8 schools and definitely sounds like they try to steer kids to different schools so not all applying to same. Since itâs mixed US, UK, and then other countries as well it seems like it would spread the competition out also.
Our buddy family is vying for Yale as first choice, I didnât share S24âs deferral and rejection yet, but offered to help on any insight as little as I have. I sensed they were in a we have a plan mode, which mine was too, but he still evolved quite a bit over the year honing in on what he really valued.
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Picking up the rental car day after tomorrow in preparation for the long drive on Thurs to TX. Itâs never a dull moment, though, because that same day as rental car pick up, I have to go to Meet the Teacher night at D26âs school. 
D24 has been hanging out with us a lot in the past several days and Iâm relishing in it since pretty soon, that will end. D24 said that sheâs purposely been asking me to drive her to Starbucks & similar places lately because she wants to spend time with her mom before she heads off to college. 
I think sheâs ready. I told her the other day that Iâm actively working on not nagging/reminding her about things and Iâve been trying to change my phrasing from âYou need to ____â to âHave you considered ___?â
We havenât yet done the healthcare power of attorney form. Need to take that to a notary this evening or tomorrow after work. Wonât have time on Wed.
Some parents on the Facebook group are still occasionally asking about room dimensions. 
Hey, our kids are all moving in this Friday, so if you donât find out ahead of time, youâll know what the room dimensions are at the end of this week.
1st year student orientation for D24âs college is all this weekend. They have a pretty packed schedule Friday evening through Monday and classes start on Tuesday. I think thatâs a good thingâŠtheyâre having them do a lot of group activities together throughout the weekend, including a freshman class service project on Sun or Mon. D24 already knows itâll be important to participate in that stuff since itâs a good way to make connections with other students in the same boat as her.
She & I read a news article a few days ago about a mom who slept in the daughterâs dorm the first night or 2 after move-in. D24 was relieved to hear that I wonât ever be doing that to her. I also told her that we wonât be calling or emailing her professors like some crazy helicopter parents do, but the rule still stands that she needs to share with us what her grades are periodically throughout each semester.
No progress has been made on packing. I think sheâll do it on Wed night when itâs time to load up the car!
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So D24 moved in 10 days ago and classes start Wednesday.
She goes to a big SEC school where there is absolutely no university-owned housing after your first year (unless you are NMF).
I am already getting terrified because of the parent page on FB and all of the people who are moving their upperclassmen in and the apartments just being disgusting and filthy, along with all of the parents who are trying to fight scam move out charges from their last lease.
I have also learned that if you want to be close to campus or someplace nicer, you have to sign a lease by October. AAAAGGGGGHHHHHH But I have also been informed that you should try to stay in the bougie apartments near campus because thereâs a fair amount of crime once you get past the campus bubble.
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Donât know which school.
At Bama, not by October. They tell you that - but you can find stuff later. You might be random though - they do individual leases so you can be matched with another.
At my daughterâs non-SEC school - yes by October - and they have houses (old ones) and theyâre all not fit for human consumption - and yet Iâm paying $1300 a month + for this. Dead roaches everywhere when we got there the other day, rusted fridge (still runs fine landlord says).
At Bama, tons of nice apartments around - my son lived in one right next to the law school - three years - his roommates changed but he kept the same bad / bath. Itâs beat up - but disgusting not - and filth - well, you clean when you get there.
is it a different school?
The best places rent early - but a school like Bama, some kids live far away, thereâs ample. But close - yes, jump early - but not that early - thatâs a lot of FUD - fear, uncertainty, and doubt. Old marketing pressure tactic (that works).
Never was a problemâŠbut yes, the early gets the better or closer places.
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It is Bama. Holy cow some of the pictures I am seeing of apartments at move in are just disgusting. D24 really would prefer to not have a car, which limits things to the bus route or super close. I have a list of complexes to avoid at all cost.
I find that whole sharing an apartment with strangers thing weird so we may just go for a studio or one bedroom if we can find one.
They share a dorm with one.
Hopefully he has a roommate but worst case.
There are many u can bike from.
I paid $700 for a bed/bath at - next to law school and the hospital. Canât remember the name.
Theyâre fine. The ones next to Aldi are fine.
My kid biked but had a bus option
Apt complexes will keep a min standard. No, theyâre not what you and I would want but have granite. Washer dryer. Bring a vacuum and elbow grease. They were maintenance responsive too.
If you can afford it you can find your own.
You will have beds in an apt come free later too. Kids dropping out or transferring.
Mine was in a 3 bed 3 bath. Canât remember the name. Ugh
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S24 is also at SEC school which sounds exactly the same situation. It is indeed very stressful.
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East Edge - couldnât remember the name.
For a college apartment, itâs close and solid. Singles -no clue. We paid in the final year $700 - and Iâm sure there will be openings in the SpringâŠin fact I know there will be - but maybe beds.
Then you interview those there.
My sonâs roommates moved out /graduated. He didnât care. He rented his room and dealt with what came - and i think it always came in the spring. He had two new sets the 2nd and 3rd year after the ones he chose to live with 2nd year bailed.
Bikeable, next to a police station and has a bus.
A few roaches here and there but not like CharlestonâŠand thatâs part the kidâs cleanliness.
I thought in very good shape - and a nice pool.
And each kid had their own bathroom.
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Today was the first day of class for S24 and he texted me in a panic after the second class. Each class has more than his entire graduating class and he is overwhelmed with being talked at by a stranger for an hour and then having to âfigure it all outâ on his own. We texted back and forth about college lectures and how they work, sitting in the front, going to office hours, utilizing every resource available like the free tutoring by peers, student success center, etc. He then had his third class which was only 20 kids and a requirement in order to live in the out of state dorm. He loves that class. And then his math class, although big, says the teacher seems really nice. SO, he then called me later to tell me about the last two classes and sounded his normal happy self. Phew. it is so hard when you get a text not to get al wrapped up in it. I really was stressed about how upset he sounded. I know he will figure it all out on his own and freshman and a lot of sophomore year is mostly fulfilling those core requirements which is hard. I got my BSN and hated the first 3 semesters of school because none of it applied to nursing, so I totally get it. He wants to just jump ahead to the business classes and skip over this âfluff stuffâ.
I was happy to hear he is loving his fraternity pledge class and has been spending a LOT of time with them (does not really have a choice). He also had his floor meeting with th RA and loves his RA. Says he was happy to get a chance to meet the rest of the guys on his floor. And last night he was down in the common room which is super nice with couches and a huge TV hanging out with pretty much the entire dorm (only 75 kids in the building, most from out of state). So it sounds like at least he loves where is and is meeting kids and having fun. Now he needs to figure out the âschoolâ part.
Anyway, just wanted to update. Hard to believe it has already been a week since he moved in.
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You gave him great advice about classes! My D24 has one class transition that is a 25-min walk in 20 mins. She got lucky and caught a bus on the way todayâhopefully it will happen a lot. When she told me, I suggested that she tell the lab teacher (grad assistant) after class, because Iâm a regional univ professor and I always appreciate it when people let me know if they might be habitually late! She said she did, and it went over well.
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I have to admit - over the year plus I have thoroughly enjoyed reading this thread and it is exciting to see everyoneâs progression. Through where to apply, the visits and applications, to actually being on campus. Taking that next step. Enough so it has become a daily read for me.
Good luck with your kiddos! And for those on the quarter system, like our household, move in is a month +/- away. Yeah!!!
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Some news updates:
- D24 had a melt down earlier today over the blanket on her bed. It was like watching her when she was 2 yr old and having temper tantrums. She gave herself a time out and all was well after an hour.
- She received an email from the mail room at college informing her thereâs a package there for her to pick up. This matches the delivery notice she got from Target about the mini fridge purchased online a few days ago. So weâll go get it from the mail room on Friday.
- Sheâs decided that she wants cutesy-shaped ice cube trays for the freezer part of the mini fridge so we are going to shop this evening for that.
- Kid also got an email today from the music professor whoâs in charge of the a capella choir. Email was addressed to voice scholarship students, talked about encouraging other students to audition and sign up for a capella choir, making sure youâve signed up for 2x/wk private music lessons, too, and to come see the professor on Fri or Sat in the music building. The thing isâŠshe was informed earlier this spring that she wasnât awarded a music scholarship. So she replied back and asked for clarification, also said that sheâd very much like to participate in the choir anyway regardless. Prof emailed back and said (paraphrasing here), âUmâŠLet me go check on this and Iâll get back to you tomorrow.â Interesting.
- D24 said that her joining something like choir will be a good way to meet other people, easy to make friends quickly, and itâs something she likes to do anyway. This makes my mom heart happyâŠsheâs thinking about how to get involved.
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Registration got done last night which makes it so real! Williams has an interesting process but hopefully all is set now. We donât leave for another weekish
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Itâs so bad it made the local news.
And even after this, kids went in to find squatters in their apartment.
I now have a list of places to avoid at all cost, a list of places that might be ok, but where youâre rolling the dice a bit, and then like maybe 3 that have 90% satisfaction. But management changes and these places rebrand, and itâs all a crapshoot, but thereâs an unacceptably high % of predatory behavior by the apartment complexes.
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My S24âs roommate asked if the fridge we are bringing has a freezer compartment for his frog-shaped ice cube trays.
I may have missed a memo
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âŠaaaaannnnnnd weâre back!
Long update below, for those who want the TLDR version: Sheâs moved in and I think itâs going to be good.
We drove up Sunday morning. Listened to six hours of The Bridge station on Sirius the whole way up. I never realized how many soft classic 70âs songs about love and heartbreak can easily sound like they are describing the feeling of letting your child head off to start their adult life. The first song that played was âJust a Song Before I Goâ and it only got more wrenching from there. 
The actual move-in process was very easy and well-coordinated. We had almost everything set up within 2 hours.
The great news is that D24âs quad situation has now turned into a triple instead. In addition, she was pleasantly surprised to learn her room has an en-suite bathroom. We were not expecting that. It did require an extra trip to Target to get stuff to outfit it (shelving unit, bathmats, hand soap dispenser, toilet bowl brush 
). $210 later, I think she has everything she needs.
The roommates both seem nice, though all were quiet and a little awkward with each other while we were there. Hoping that they all warm up as they get to know each other.
The weather was terrible (rain, rain, rain) and so we did less of the exploring on campus that I had hoped we would do. We headed home after meeting up with D24 for breakfast on campus. It was really hard to leave her, such dreary weather and feeling so unsettled. H and I had had a little argument earlier in the morning, so the first few hours of the car ride home were ⊠silent, as we were both annoyed with each other and worried about D24. Did not help my sadness about our impending empty nest. Thankfully, D24 sent a text a couple of hours later that she had ventured to the fitness center for a work out and it was really nice. That broke the gloom in the car. By the time we got home, we could see by her location that she was off campus at a restaurant, so Iâm assuming that was an outing with the roommates. 
We arrived home to see D20, who had come down from Boston to watch our dogs and stay a few extra days before she starts a new job next week. So, empty nest is delayed a bit longer. Also, after working for all of a month in her big girl job, D20 informed us that she plans to move back home in a year to get her MSW at the Uni where I work (for free), so I went from lamenting that we were looking at an empty nest for the rest of our days to realizing that we only have a year to enjoy an empty nest until sheâs back 
Enjoying reading everyone elseâs move-in stories. Best of luck to those who are leaving this week!
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The kid is packing today and got a last minute hair cut. Sheâs bringing her teddy bear with herâŠthe bear that my mom gave her when she was 6 months old. My mom died when D24 was 4. D24 said, âOf course Iâm bringing him! That way, a part of Nana is coming, too.â
Aahhhh! ALL THE FEELS!
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Weâre on the plane now heading home after 4 nights away for move-in. The three of us had a fun time exploring the city as well as some recreating outside the city (rafting, hiking) before drop-off yesterday. It was a sweet time together, definitely a little bittersweet and I tried to stay in the moment enjoying our time together. Some deep conversations over meals proved to me that not only is she ready to be away from home, but sheâs ready to engage deeply at the LAC sheâs attending. She really thrives in close relationships and when she is seen, and I think sheâll have plenty of opportunity for both.
Move-in day itself was very well organized and went super smoothly. We moved her stuff in (3 duffle bags, 3 IKEA bags, one roller carry-on, and the contents of 3 Target shopping carts) and unpacked and set everything up in about 3 hours, including decorating. The college had events for students and others for families all afternoon. After dinner together, parents were sent on our way by 8:30 pm since students had floor meetings with their fellow residents and RAs. Looking at the schedule, itâs an informative and dare I say intimate NSO week (groups of 10 students do a variety of activities together all week in addition to larger all-class sessions). Sheâs already figured out how to drop and add a class, making her desired schedule change (had to email a professor for permission for the add), and set up a meeting with her advisor tomorrow.
Dorm is fine, pretty spacious double with no AC but in good repair and comfortable. Her roommate (who she met on the IG page this spring) seems kind and like a solid no-drama kind of person. I hesitate to speak too soon, but H and I agree that the college seems to be a perfect match for D24, and man is she ready and happy. Iâm pretty emotional, whether from this huge life change, or lack of sleep many nights in a row, or a combination of both, but I know sheâs in a great place and am also so excited for her.
One more fun thing was the impromptu hang-out with several other families last night in our hotel bar. Interesting conversations, shared experiences, and lots of mutual support. Iâm not a big drinker but a drink and conversation really boosted my spirits.
Good luck to all who still have move-in coming up! (Bring tissues.)
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