Same for me. I would definitely be checking obsessively if I had access to anything. I do the “so, are you making sure to open emails and check portals for your schools?” about once/week, but all I get is “yep”. 
He has three rolling decisions that should be coming in any day now, but I would have no idea if they were already in and S has just overlooked them. I do know that his first choice school will not notify until late Jan/early Feb, so I am trying (so.very.hard) to keep myself in check. He applied to 15 EA schools and is done with that process, so I can only sit back and wait for news.
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Im on here or checking things as a distraction from finishing the essays I need to grade for work. I did a bit of holiday decorating this week finally. I am going to be painting a cabinet I got free and baking cookies this weekend. But next week will be crazy as the house has to be organized and ready as my spouse is donating a kidney just before the holidays. Good deed, horrible timing.
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I’m so with you. No access for me to anything. The stakes seem really high to let D25 manage this on her own but I’m trying to tell myself it’s for her good and mine. She learns she can do it (or what to fix). I also learn she can do it and can stop worrying so much. Super difficult trying to keep my mouth shut though
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Wow, you and your family are giving an amazing gift. Sounds like you have a great mindset. Enjoy the holidays!
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I will wish for your spouse what we medical professionals traditionally wish for each other: a straightforward procedure and a very boring recovery.
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I feel so seen, y’all.
–nothing to do but fret.
–kid has to be nagged to check email.
–I’m convinced that he’s actually missing critical pieces of applications for some of these schools and we won’t find out until it’s too late.
–I’m resisting checking his email for him because, you know, boundaries? (I am bad at them.) But since I am the one who set up his gmail account when he was too small to even use it, I definitely could…but he hasn’t given me permission and I’m feeling oddly squeamish.
–So instead I’m staying up late careening between a few different paths. Choose your own adventure and come along:
Path A: Let’s get excited about Oregon State! Wait, Oregon looks pretty and green. Wonder if we should leave the Bay Area? Let’s get excited about Oregon real estate. Wait…what’s the weather like there again?
Path B: There must be SOME school that I haven’t thought about that might be perfect for the kiddo. Not too big…not too small…smart but nice students…offers engineering…pretty, cohesive campus with housing…maybe he could ED2?! (Check Naviance records for Wash U St. Louis again, note that the average accepted GPA is almost half a point higher than S25, and sigh.)
Path C: Shoot, did he really sign up for all the interviews? Was he supposed to send actual test scores in to Minnesota? Is anyone missing a transcript? Is there an honors college or WUE application that we missed? DID HE SEND THANK YOU NOTES? 
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And this is why I lurk on these boards. Thank you @goldbug for the validation and the very humorous distraction and recap of my brain in the pinball game that I thought I was alone in living in these days!!
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I give all your kids so much credit. My D23 did not have help from us, nor give us access to any of her portals or email and also completed honors college apps on her own without any reminders from me. I had no idea the scope of things she managed until my S25 (totally different kid) asked me if I would help stay on track and gave me access to all his portals/passwords and his college-specific email so I could help him. It was eye opening!
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so so so true…
That said my kid lets me check portals and I reviewed final application submissions (hey, I am paying!). They know that isn’t their forte. My partner teased kid that I was doing so. Kid said “but they (me) thinks its so fun” 
Truthfully I think it has kept 25’s stress level down a bit, and let them focus on school work/deadlines/projects/ECs which is enough for any HS student (and honestly nearly as much as many adults deal with).
I suspect my 27 won’t tell me a thing, no matter what I say though
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Our brains are the same. Allllll of these things. And add a nightmare last night that she got into her favorite but we couldn’t afford it by like $5k/yr and the admissions office said well gosh if you’d just taken the SAT one more time and gotten 10 more points or gotten 1 less B we could give you that extra $.
(Last night she came downstairs and basically told us to be prepared for her grades to go down bc she did poorly on a few tests last week — bc she didn’t make time to study as we warned her to do … siiiiiigh)
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In an effort to not just be a creepy stalker on this site, I’m putting out into the universe what has been a quiet idea taking shape in my head for the last week.
Trying to think of ways to not obsess about how the first week of college for our only child will go, and am considering a once in a lifetime trip to Hawaii shortly after S25 will get dropped off. The two favored schools start a week apart either 8/18 or 8/25, and DH works for a Spanish company so most of the bigwigs take off the entire month of August. The visit has been on my wish list for a long time, and it fits well with a certain milestone birthday coming up next year for me.
The idea would be to distract myself from worrying/obsessing about how S25 will be adjusting to dorm life/a roommate/classes/cafeterias, etc. But there is the worrywart part of me that says what am I thinking getting on a plane and flying for 14 hours when the kiddo will be swimming in a whole new pond, regardless of where it is!
Still, I think volcanoes and manta rays could be just what I need to stay away from abusing the Find My app….
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I hear you. Missouri IS awful. If you moved, you might lose pension $, but you might gain less stress and thus, a healthier life.
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I think it’s a brilliant idea.
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Well, I get the idea of him being off adjusting to a new life and being away for the beginning of that may be somewhat disconcerting, but, unless he is going to school close by, there is not much that you could do anyway. More importantly, unless something medically related or something along those lines occurs, your presence probably wouldn’t be necessary.
This is a long winded way of suggesting that you should probably book that once in a lifetime trip.
I lurked on the Parents 2024 page last year and several parents took a planned trip just following drop off. For the most part, I think they all reported that it was a good idea.
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As said by Grandma Sarah in Outlaw Josey Wales: “Anything from Missouri has a taint about it.”
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Do it!!!
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Ok, it’s good to hear that a vacay after the drop off worked out well for other folks. That’s very helpful, thank you!!
And it is funny that you say the distance won’t likely make much of a difference, since I totally agree…and yet, one of the top two choices is literally a ten minute drive away, tops! 
(of course, first he has to be accepted for that to be a factor!!!)
I semi-joke that my retirement project should be pursuing a Doctor of Theology degree, specifically because I am part of a faith tradition in which that would be 100% useless.
(But it would be so interesting!!)
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THIS IS ME! What if we didn’t consider one of the 3000 US institutions that could be your perfect match?!? Meanwhile, S25 is “Rose-Hulman or bust.” As the young people say, I need to slow my roll. (Or maybe they said it 10 years ago.)
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D25 gets 4 EA decisions next week (maybe the first as early as Monday?) and this wait is EXCRUCIATING!! She’s said that she may just not submit any more apps depending on the answers. I’d like to see one more high target in-state go out (because great school, in-state tuition!), but I wonder how much more any of us have left in the tank.
I have been composing an email to myself to schedule delivery for Jan 2030 (S30!!) with Lessons Learned and Do’s/Don’t s). Not sure a schedule-delivery 6 years from now is doable but I’m going with it LOL. High on that list is basically, “for Pete’s sake turn in every app EA that is possible because we will ALL lose steam before RD deadlines arrive.”
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