I’m sorry. This process can be so brutal. The pressure many of our kids feel is just too much. Hugs to you and your son. I hope today is a better day.
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Congrats!! That was my top choice when I was in high school(waitlisted).
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Quiet and withdrawn but he has plans to go do something with his bestie which is good and worth my having to drive to VA lol (we live in MD). I called my mother in law and had a long long talk and she is with me so she plans on calling him. My older son sent him the most amazing note last night and I am reminded the biggest success is being the kind of person who tells your little brother they are amazing and they love them when he needs support.
I have also gathered my data to show him his view is incorrect and fed by a billion dollar industry that helps kids get into college and justifies the insane cost of college. That the vast majority of people simply can’t afford these schools and choose more affordable options and that doesn’t mean they won’t be successful.
We have tours lined up for Purdue and DE for after the play in March.
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I’m glad today is looking better. We must not live too far apart - I’m in Arlington, and feel the same when my son wants to hang with his friends who live outside of Bethesda. 
So good that the family is on the same page, and it sounds like your boys have a great relationship - hopefully words from big brother will sink in and help him move past yesterday.
There’s so much to love about Purdue engineering! (No knock on DE, my older guy applied to Purdue so we researched it a lot, I just don’t know anything about Delaware - other than that the kids who go there seem to love it.)
I hope the next few days, some time with friends, some perspective, and some fun trips to look forward to help him move past the disappointment.
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Tell me this is not going to happen. 
. I don’t care which party is proposing it; the politics here aren’t my focus. My focus is oh crap that scholarship that just barely makes a great school affordable for us now might not.
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There are 50 pages of “ideas” on that leaked document. Try not to worry until a proposal is actually brought up in committee, politicians suggest nutty ideas all the time. With a 4 seat majority nothing like this will even make it to discussion, let alone get voted to the floor.
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This is why we need a “fingers crossed” response button.
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It’s definitely a very diverse area in the DC metro area in general. It’s for sure a different vibe than CA. So, American is a little more north than Georgetown and GWU, which I say is closer to downtown DC. But it’s still so close kid would have all the things in the DC area to do, and outside as well things to do and other big cities just hours away in either direction. So that would be interesting for sure.
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D25 and the dance team qualified for state next week earning a 1st and 2nd place finish at regionals yesterday. The competition is fierce in our region so it was a bit shocking we placed so high but they are thrilled! State comp is 3 hours away but I finally get to see S19 who I havent seen in months-to give him his Christmas and birthday gifts. Our work schedules totally clash but he lives within 15 min of where his sis will be performing.
Lots of college talk at regionals yesterday as she got to see old friends who compete on other teams. Most are very anxiously awaiting Madison release this Friday (with many tears expected). Another sad about UNC rejection but then thrilled when top choice U Mich was a yes. So excited for her! D25 openly admitted her top choice which was good to hear her happy and proud to share her news (as it is a college nobody in her circle has heard of).
I got teary watching the other teams, several who D25 had danced with before, performing their “last dance.” I feel very blessed that all my kids had an amazing experience with sports/ECs throughout high school with all 3 being successful and able to attend State events. They all left having no regrets. I am sure there will be tears this weekend though.
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We are in a similar boat-- my son didn’t apply to Tulane but was also waitlisted at Cox. He also decided that without that, he wouldn’t go to SMU. And he found out he was deferred at U Miami, and invited to switch his app to ED2. (every deferred student is) but it costs $93K to go to U Miami and committing to ED is pretty scary.
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We are definitely in the same boat. Son also just got deferred from UMiami as well as UT Austin (in addition to Clemson earlier in the cycle). We don’t want to ED2 to UMiami, and so are in a holding pattern until RD now.
It just seems like it has been tough out there this year, particularly for boys applying for a business major, and deferments are being handed out everywhere. My kid is awesome, but I guess nothing stood out as exceptional on his app. 
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I wouldn’t say that. It has to do with institutional priorities more than your kid not being exceptional. It feels so personal. I oscillate between tears and anger because it has taken my confident kid and made him feel small. And the platitudes from some of these institutions make me want to drive there and give them a swift kick in the crotch.
But I can assure you I don’t even know your kid but I have no doubts they are in many ways exceptional.
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…aww thank you. Based on your posts in this thread, I know that your son has been having a tough time too with deferrals, especially as he is a super high stats kid. Hugs to you during this process too. I love that we have all got each other’s backs in this thread 
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My son and I just had a conversation about how many high stats kids in his school are getting deferred. He said college admissions just feel so judgmental and unfair. The deferrals seem so icky. It’s like, “we kind of like you, but we want to see what else is out there first.”
He was deferred from UMiami too, but knew to expect that, because most music kids are. It sounds like not just music kids this year. This definitely doesn’t endear me to that school.
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I agree. My son said Tik Tok is full of kids talking about deferrals too (I don’t have Tik Tok!). It’s definitely annoying to wait until the RD pool, when your kid spent so much time getting the apps in early.
We received a notification of missing tax documents and were told to upload it directly to the portal. When we went on my son’s portal for the school there was a place to upload it and submit it under financial aid. He was already accepted in to this school about a month ago. So maybe check your daughter’s portal? Hope that helps!
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I think a deferral is awful because most turn into denials so it’s cruel. Make a decision and let the kids move on. I told my husband I want him to write a Loci saying I am not going to beg you for my admittance. Either you can see what I can bring to your community or you don’t but I’m not going to sit here and debase myself to beg. If you want sycophants then I’m not your kid. Just once just once I want him to write that!!!
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I agree with him!
I get why it really helps the university, and obviously some kids still get in, but the feeling is weird to be in that middle space. Like you are qualified, but maybe not qualified enough? blah.
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Can I brag for a minute? After helping DS get into college last year (class of '24) I signed up for ScholarMatch upon the recommendation of people here. And on Friday my student got into UNC-CH and NC State - she’s now 9/9 on colleges so far. And UNC (which is the first school to give her aid details) gave her effectively a free ride, so her “back-up plan” is now UNC.
She’s waiting on four more schools and aid details for all of them, but I’m so happy for her and excited to see what she decides!
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