I think my D26 plans to (finally) commit this afternoon. I believe she just needed a little more time to mull everything over.
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Nope. In fact despite twice answering about a specific major some of the schools don’t even have it, and …none of the schools overlapped with their application list. The closest was one that was considered for a while then decided not to apply.
It did not! Despite my putting in Tech/CS and Art/Design, it returned Emory but not Georgia Tech. 
(The others listed were all reach schools, none of which she wanted despite high stats.)
Fantastic dress! I love the color! She looks amazing.
My daughter wanted a yard sign, but said no to a grad party (which was good because we were having trouble finding a date that would work) or announcements (also good because I didn’t really want to deal with that).
Senior Assassin apparently starts soon. Daughter came home from an acapella concert last night with a spongebob water gun and strict instructions not to open the door for any teenagers (later amended to “you know what, just don’t open the door to anyone”). Not sure how she hasn’t yet noticed that we never open the door to anyone unless we’re expecting them.
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Congratulations! Sounds like a perfect fit for your daughter!
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I think things are hitting home for C26 that ..stuff is happening soon. We had a bit of a rollercoaster day yesterday embracing both excitement and anxiety about everything, from “look at these cool courses I can take” to tears about a whole bunch of things (leaving friends behind, worries about homesickness, what if everyone there is awful” etc), back to “wow look at these amazing grads from this school” and laughing at the video clips of a cow that got loose on the campus yesterday. (Which is not so different from home, our town abuts a rural area with some ranches and we also occasionally get cows wandering downtown!)
Re the worries about the school, I reassured them it’s normal, suggested they speak to D19 who also had massive anxiety ahead of leaving, was so homesick by thanksgiving she wanted to transfer to a UC, and now of course not only stayed but is going back for grad school. I also pointed out that this decision doesn’t define them - we make the best decisions we can with the information we have available at the time, but if it ends up not being the right choice they can transfer, they’re not stuck for four years - but they have to get past what is often the 1st semester hump before even thinking about that. (And also said sometimes people apply to transfer and by the time they get the decisions have decided they’re happy where they are.) They seemed a little better after that, I suggested they write down all their concerns and we can go through them one by one and either plan around them (like keeping contact with friends) or discuss what the plan B might be. Any other ideas? (Kid does tend towards anxiety so I expect there will be more episodes like this). I am hoping reg/orientation helps a bit as they should hopefully meet some people then too.
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The friend who lives with us had completely decided Tuesday on practical grounds, and then midday yesterday his other finalist called him with a significantly more generous package than they had before. A very overwhelming good problem.
My son, meanwhile, is about to receive a Kenyon purple and white tie I ordered last night along with our car sticker and my new coffee mug.
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Remind them that while they are at school if things are tough - make sure to shower, eat, and sleep. It’s not a cure-all but most things look more managable if you can check those boxes.
Homesickness is normal and to be expected - even for the most confident kid. I like your idea of having a plan -but it’s also okay to walk through and live those emotions.
And most of all -college doesn’t define them. Life throws you all sorts of unexpected events -some good, some bad - it’s really okay to make mistakes, to stumble, to feel - at times - unsure. It’s human - it’s normal -and it’s a part of life. I think sometimes us anxious folk set too high an expectation for ourselves. But it’s okay to make mistakes. The important thing is to get back up again.
And remind them -they are loved or will be loved- not just by their parents and their friends –but also by many of the people they have yet to meet! I am an instructor, and I care deeply about my students. There are always people willing to help if you reach out. You don’t have to go through hard or challenging times all by yourself.
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Oh wow - exciting and anxiety provoking!
And yeah for the Kenyon tie!
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Also -my daughter has a preliminary choice. She is going to class - and said she might change her mind by the time she gets back! Haha. I told her to talk to her favorite teacher and see what he says. He knows her really well.
She compared her college choice to having a dependable - if not always exciting partner -versus a partner who is super fun and danger prone. Haha! I told her maybe go to the “reliable partner” school and have a fling with excitement on study abroad. 
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Any of us in long-term marriages know that she is wise 
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We have coffee mugs too! Illinois mom & Illinois dad. Got C26 a cute axolotl in UoI shirt key chain. They already have a beanie, socks & water bottle from the school as swag! .
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WOW! That worked. D26’s school (WashU) is in the top 3 results. The “one that got away” IMO was the last on the list–Wellesley. And, I really love this, because it’s basically telling me I was RIGHT about all the other schools I insisted she look at. And I can use some positive feedback right now. D26 is in full Soiling the Nest Mode and I just don’t get it! This is a kid who is normally a ray of sunshine. But as of right now, she’s trying to ban me (!!) from taking prom pictures tomorrow. Huh?! Who has patiently helped her source every last exacting piece of the look for the past 6 months and paid for it all??? I am remaining calm. This too shall pass.
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Are the baby gates to keep the kids from getting out of their rooms??
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I have no advice, but I appreciate you asking this question and will eagerly read everyone (including your) advice on how to deal with anxiety before and during the early days.
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I just did this using daughter’s criteria and her school popped up at the top of the list. There were a couple other schools she applied to also on the list as well as a bunch which were never on her radar.
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Nope, unacceptable. When my kids are being like that, I often pull out, “Let me remind you that I carried you INSIDE my body for many long months and then painfully birthed you. So the least you can do is let me take some damn pictures.”
It’s become a running joke in our family – I rarely use it now because they are long-suffering but pretty good at indulging me when I’m on mom overdrive.
(Not that taking pictures before prom is anything extra. That is a rite of passage for any parent whose child goes to prom. Sheesh.)
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We just ordered our orange Occidental gear today. This morning D26 said to us unprompted, even though I didn’t want to be where Kenyon is, I think I could have had a great time there. I also think she would have had a wonderful experience there.
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It’s official!!! My daughter committed to Macalester! And the first thing we did was buy a sweatshirt and t-shirt for her and a pennant for her teacher. 
Go Scots!
This has been exhausting and I’m glad we are moving onto the next stage! Yay!
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Huge Congratulations! So glad you have a decision!
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