<p>We recently visited my mil who lives in the Southwest. She kept telling my DH that he needed to get rid of the “Eastern accent” he’d picked up since we moved to New Jersey two years ago. She kept saying, “It’s very low class and will hurt you professionally. It makes you sound uneducated.” Now, neither of us has “picked up” any accent. We’ve lived all over the US and always enjoyed the different accents in various regions.</p>
<p>Finally, I just responded with “Well, Mother, you might want to be conscious of your own accent. People in the Northeast might think you’re mentally ■■■■■■■■ because of your slow drawl.”</p>
<p>She was livid, of course, but my DH is still chuckling . . .</p>
<p>“Ohiomom–your MIL is probably on another thread complaining about how you just can’t please everybody no matter how hard you try. LOL”</p>
<p>I actually found my mil amusing most of the time and posted that. I even found her gifting the minister’s wife with the ceramic pig funny. The only thing that really annoyed me was when she gave my new baby a taste of Coca Cola. I didn’t mind the pet names she had for my husband. But, I would have objected if she had continued to use them around her grandchildren when they were old enough to understand because they could be seen as demeaning. She never did though. Her intention was to be humorous and she usually was! I do miss her. She always treated me with respect and affection.</p>
<p>I’m laughing at some of these posts and counting my blessings. In 25 years, the worst thing my MIL ever said was that I needed another lamp in the living room. Really! Now, the SIL is another matter…</p>
<p>Ok…just a chuckle and then done…my bil told me that his mother had “just” one more wish…going out to dinner with bil and sil. Yes…the five of us together…sharing dinner.</p>
<p>(Did I mention that she told me she “just”, as a last request to have Thanksgiving together…and Christmas…?</p>
<p>Seems to me she’s got a lot of last requests. </p>
<p>Oh and where does she want to have dinner? In MY part of the metropolis. This should be fun…</p>
<p>Accents are a funny thing. And how the outside world perceives it…I really don’t care. I have one…swear to …it is a California/New Yorkish/Brooklynish…But mostly a west Los Angeles accent. When I was growing up in this insular place many of us started life and most of our parents grew up in New York (Brooklyn and the Bronx in particular) and or Chicago. I have r…and l …I don’t saw bawl for ball…but it is there…</p>
<p>Ohiomom–my dearest neighbor tried ALL sorts of things out on my new baby much to my initial dismay! (She already had a couple). Arghh! I would be upset and she’d laugh at me. I learned the lesson–have FUN with your kids, take them everywhere, they’re your family and your life. They won’t break unless you break them.</p>
<p>^ You are right, but as a first time Mom I thought, “Why are you giving my 3 month old soda?” It was literally a drop, but still! I have to admit when I think of it now, her expression and the laugh she got from the expression on my face tickles me.</p>
<p>tptshorty, Ellebud & everyone else with horrid MIL’s I feel your pain. But it’s my own mother who is the horror show, not my MIL. She’s so awful that friends, who upon meeting her, have apologized to both me and my sister for thinking we exaggerated. </p>
<p>My MIL has five children and her youngest (not DH) is her favorite. She lives 45 minutes and we see her fairly often. She’s not intrusive and she’s kind to our children, even if they are not her favorites. I’m just grateful she’s not a train wreck like my mother.</p>
<p>I have a dear friend who’s mother is…challenging. Five husbands…bipolar…mother went after all my friend’s husbands. Ok, there were a few more husband than one. I have known my friend for over 30 years. Her mother is charming to me. She always is charming, except to her daughter.</p>
<p>One of my favorite lines from the mother? “Knock it off…or I will send you out to play on Wilshire.” (That’s a main street here.) Mom has seen her grandson…two or three times. Never met (or acknowledged) her great grandchildren.</p>
<p>“Knock it off…or I will send you out to play on Wilshire.”</p>
<p>Great line. Brings to mind my grandmother’s favorite saying. If a child complains that she is bored, she gets a Yiddish suggestion: “Go hit your head on the wall.”</p>
<p>Oh Hanna, I could bastardize the quote and try to say that in Yiddish. Slush a kup und vont…My father used to say that. I haven’t thought of that in years.</p>
<p>Busyparent, sounds like you have hit on the best response for you mil. Just stone faced silence.
Maybe a tiny snort after she has turned away, but only if your kids don’t hear.
Bless you!</p>
<h1>"H’s mom has never said “no” in her life. In fact, she didn’t really say “no” to us…she just nervously laughed and said, “I don’t know where you can sleep because X and Y are in the room I had for you.” </h1>
<p>Well, she didn’t have to say “no” to them either. She could have said, “I don’t know where you can sleep because A and B are going to be sleeping in that room.”</p>
<p>Good point. Frankly, the sibling and spouse were just as guilty. they knew we were coming, so what made them think that they could take the only spare bedroom???</p>
<p>Update: Apparently my mother-in-law “forgives” me. She wants to go back to ‘how we were’ before her outburst. I bet she does, because I haven’t capitulated. I’ve just continued to go ‘no contact’. My husband says he wasn’t able to pee for the past few weeks while she was on her rampage. Talk about having someone by the balls! He feels “so much better” now that she’s calmed down.
WHAT ABOUT ME???
And all the s#$% she heaved at me? </p>
<p>I can assure you, ladies, that I have had no trouble peeing. No one has me by the balls- I guess it’s one of the advantages of not being born with any.</p>
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