<p>Curm —Ancient Ancient Age, because I feel ancient today…on the rocks with a bowl of original-flavor Bugles on the side. After that, I’m going to clean out the garage (throwing away stuff helps), take a shower, crawl into bed, and read my new Peter Beagle book, The Unicorn Sonata.</p>
<p>sluggbugg you really make me laugh.</p>
<p>Oh my goodness, look at that! I posted the 1000th post in this thread and didn’t even notice. Yay me. I get to go pick up my new progressive bifocals now, and maybe treat myself to a few pieces of sushi and some warm sake on the way home.</p>
<p>Then I’m thinking about heading out to see “The Aristocrats” tonight maybe… even if I have to do it solo. </p>
<p>I also want to see “Murderball”, anyone else seen that one?</p>
<p>Sluggie–okay, thanks for the chicken igloo clarification. </p>
<p>Are people really registering their college kids for courses? Oh my. Hey, good luck with your son. Do whatcha gotta do. I can relate. I won’t go into it now. It’s in the past. . .I SO hope it is in the past. This summer went relatively well. I’m good. LOL, your comment on farting a concerto reminds me of a couple of essays my oldest once wrote. I don’t think he submitted them to colleges, though I wouldn’t put it past him. . .</p>
<p>Pour me a tall cool margarita on the rocks, please. I’ve got less than 100 posts til I make the coveted “Senior Member” status - woohoo! </p>
<p>“Aristocrats” is on my list, but I doubt they’ll ever show it in the burbs.</p>
<p>Okay, I’ve got one for you folks–weirdest Christmas gift ever. My H’s folks sent an early Christmas gift (they are going out of the country until Jan.), and e-mailed that we should open it early as there is a rebate offer enclosed. Guess what it is. It is a Christmas gift for the whole family, supposedly including the two oldest who are in college.</p>
<p>Let’s see… is it a TiVO?</p>
<p>mootmom, congrats on post 1000.</p>
<p>And go see Wedding Crashers. I shrieked with laughter.</p>
<p>:::clink::: Here’s to Mootie for tipping us over the One Thousand mark!</p>
<p>You toy with us, Mstee. A Christmas gift from the in-laws for the whole family…hmmm… </p>
<ol>
<li> A 4 ft. tall, plastic, light-up Santa Claus for your front porch?</li>
<li> A digital camera?</li>
</ol>
<p>Curmie,</p>
<p>make that a couple of margaritas, where sitting with fireflyscout as we ponder the following:</p>
<p>Is it a seasonal gift?</p>
<p>How much is the rebate?</p>
<p>Do you get to keep the money?</p>
<p>Is getting the rebate better than having to keep the gift?</p>
<p>Is it something that you would be proud to regift?</p>
<p>Well, I was going to ask if we could have 20 Questions, mstee. But Sybbie seems to have <em>presumed</em>. I’m thinking if there’s a rebate, it’s something techie. And I’m thinking if it’s for the “whole family, supposedly…” that’s it’s a little off the mark. But I can’t come up with an item meeting both of those criteria.</p>
<p>Hmmm, a cell phone?</p>
<p>More magaritas please.</p>
<p>Hmmm…if it were my mother in law, it would be something like a George Forman Electric Grill or a water pick. But she’d probably have kept the rebate for herself.</p>
<p>carolyn, a new contest idea! The “If It were my mother-in-law” contest.</p>
<p>If it were my mother-in-law, it would be an electronic Chia Pet. And it would be nestled in a pair of Xmas socks for each family member and a Xmas potholder that lights up and Xmas tea towel with a jingle bell.</p>
<p>Jmmom, I laughed at that one! My mother in law is also big on those X-mas tea towels. I have drawer-fulls of them. </p>
<p>She doesn’t go in for the Xmas socks though — no, she has these 2 three foot high plastic Santa elves and she insists my kids MUST have their pictures taken in front of them each year. The thing is, she still wants the kids to “pretend” that they are the same size as the elves like they were when they were toddlers. </p>
<p>My son is six foot four and fifteen. He no longer relishes squatting down in front of the elves each year. :)</p>
<p>LOL, Carolyn, you are the winner! </p>
<p>It is an electric toothbrush for the whole family–two parents, five kids (two of which are in college and not here most of the year). It is actually a pretty nice toothbrush, but I don’t know how MIL imagined this as a gift for the whole family? So, probably I’ll give it to S#2 to take to Chicago with him. He likes electric toothbrushes.</p>
<p>The rebate is for $10.00.</p>
<p>Personally I would have enjoyed the 4 foot tall light up Santa. </p>
<p>Carolyn, that’s quite a trick, getting a fifteen year old to pose with plastic elves every year LOL.</p>
<p>Do they really have electronic chia pets now? Perhaps that is an idea for a present for me to send the in-laws . . .heh heh</p>
<p>Oh Carolyn, I think I just choked on the margarita from laughter!</p>
<p>When my daughter was 3, I asked my MIL to get her a clock so she could learn to tell time. When we got the clock, it was the most bizarre art clock I had ever seen (complete with tiny Godzilla figure). Plus it had no numbers on the face. Interesting clock, but definitely not what I had imagined. After years of trying to spell out in detail precisely what the kids want and where to buy it, we have both given up,
especially after my son got into RPGs. She sends me money; I shop.</p>
<p>Mstee - does it at least have changeable heads?</p>
<p>Mstee, an electric toothbrush to be shared long distance is exactly the type of gift my mother in law would dream up. But, as I said, she’d keep the coupon.</p>
<p>Oh, the stories I can tell about my mother in law. Since we’re talking Christmas, here’s another:</p>
<p>Every year for Christmas and Thanksgiving dinner, my mother in law serves frozen peas. No one in the family likes them and there are always plenty left over. My mother in law always insists on clearing the leftovers from the table.</p>
<p>Finally, one year, my sister in law had Christmas dinner at her house. My mother in law brought peas. As usual, there were plenty of left over peas. My sister in law and I were cleaning up and she started to toss the leftover peas in the trash…At which point my mother in law jumped up from the dining room table and ran into the kitchen shouting “DON’T THROW OUT THE PEAS!!!” </p>
<p>Her deep dark secret then came out. Since she was a blushing bride 50 years aago she has been saving the leftover peas from Christmas and Thanksgiving dinners and freezing them to serve for the next year. If they don’t get eaten the next year, she freezes them again…and again…and again. I always wondered why the Christmas peas tasted kind of mushy and odd…now I know: there are peas on the table at Christmas that are older than my husband. Even though the secret is out, we still sit down to those d*mn peas every holiday season.</p>
<p>My mother in law is not a poor woman either, unless you’re talking about her mental state. ;)</p>
<p>I’m BAAAACK!
Meant to comment earlier but got side-tracked by the USNews rankings thread … it’s late, long drive, sore back, so 'scuse me while I gulp down my pino and head off to bed. More Vino and Vito stories tomorrow.</p>
<p>Meeanwhile, Carolyn’s “peas” stories is quite intriguing (among other colorful expressions…) How peculiar of her mother-in-law - it’s like the depression complex only instead of hoarding bags of sugar or balls of string, it’s reheating peas…Obviously twenty-year-old reheated peas can’t poison one? Do they at least change color - from delightful grass green the first year to olive drab the fourth to a hazy shade of withered yellow the tenth…</p>
<p>Syasnora…ZZZ</p>
<p>:eek:
Give up? Heck, I’d surrender the whole fort. Or </p>
<p>RPG’s? Rocket powered grenades? All we ever had was cherry bombs. Kids today have everything given to them. We are raising a generation of spoiled, and obviously heavily armed brats.JK. 
</p>
<p>(What the heck is the RPG you are talking about?)</p>
<p>Carolyn, thanks for a huge laugh re your MIL. :D: </p>
<p>My MIL did actually send us a George Forman grill, and if there was a rebate she <em>certainly</em> would’ve kept it!!</p>
<p>But the peas are absolutely beyond belief. There was an old family tradition with my mother of an ancient fruitcake, but that was a joke!!</p>
<p>mstee, that is the most absurd gift I have ever heard of. 
Sybbie, you are a psychic; she’s already regifted it!!</p>
<p>Im kicking back with a nice Sambucca.</p>
<p>I am on vacation with family and mostly offline but just had to quickly check the Alley. </p>
<p>We are having a great time staying at the vacation home of one of my old college friends. (My kids were laughing to see that my height is marked on their pantry door, circa 1985. BTW, either they re-hung the door, or I grew about a quarter inch after age 24!) </p>
<p>We are having a ball as a family; so good getting out of town where there was a dirge-like series of “lasts” and goodbyes… here it is fun, new, and peaceful. (We’re by ourselves as my friend has already gone back to her home.) </p>
<p>I had a great evening tonight… attending a poetry reading of a local writer, who is one of my favorite contemporary poets! Just happened to be doing a reading 3 blocks away; sold out, but a ticket came through at the last minute-- what luck.</p>
<p>BONUS: As we’re roughly in range of D’s future school, D’s future roommate (who is from the region) is coming to visit us tomorrow for a day or two. They have really bonded over the phone. It will be so fun to get to meet her properly, when I am not harassed, lugging suitcases, sniping at H, tripping over junk, and weeping.</p>
<p>Here’s a toast to the whole bar, enjoy your summers!!!</p>