<p>Some great ideas here. But to answer your question, IMO, you should tell your daughter how you feel. She probably will know anyways. I don’t believe keeping my lips stretched in a smile when I really have some doubts, but I will talk it out with my kids. There is a difference between disagreeing, not liking and refusing to support or pay for a decision or forbidding it. Lots of gradations there.</p>
<p>I’m appreciating and writing down all suggestions.</p>
<ol>
<li>My preference. apply to colleges and make the decision in the spring, which I will present as not cutting off any options.<br></li>
<li>Johnson & Wales</li>
<li>Drexel</li>
<li>Cornell combined program with CIA, which I’m sure she will immediately investigate, as she fancies herself quite the business savvy type.</li>
<li> CIA, right out of high school, her preference, and she actually does have a recommendation from a grad, who she has worked for.</li>
</ol>
<p>I am not afraid she can’t hack competition. She’s a nationally ranked athlete in a higly competitive woman’s sport. I AM afraid she will miss out on some growth and self-discovery by going straight into this.</p>
<p>I’m starting to see how to talk about this with her.</p>
<p>Paul Smiths in the Adirondacks is beautiful and also small, with a nice culinary management program. Just to have some diversity of location/type of school.</p>
<p>She also might want to check out Cal Poly’s program. I just went to our winter dance at the center they run and it was great.</p>
<p>[About</a> | Collins College of Hospitality Management | Cal Poly Pomona](<a href=“http://www.csupomona.edu/~collins/about.shtml]About”>http://www.csupomona.edu/~collins/about.shtml)</p>
<p>I did the HRIM degree because that was what was expected of me; I still feel resentful about it. I would not be surprised if she told you you don’t “get it” and I if she did, she is probably right. I would let her go to work for a year or two and see what she wants at that point.</p>
<p>poetgrl: even though this is hard on you right now, your daughter sounds like such a wonderful, fun and fascinating person! as you know: high class problems ;)</p>
<p>Oh, she’s a great kid, for sure. We used to say she was either going to be president or else the leader of a gang, in prison… She’s her whole own story, and I love this.</p>
<p>1moremom-- I know I don’t “get it,” since I’m not a teenager, I “don’t get it” about a lot of stuff, frankly. We have a good relationship. I respect her and her point of view, and once I figure out everything I want to say, I know she’ll hear me out. I don’t just “go to her” or do the “one more thing” with her.</p>
<p>She will listen and make a decision, and I will abide by that choice, which is hers.</p>
<p>But, you know what? I’m older than her and I know her really well, and while she’s not going to be an intellectual, or end up a professor, she’s a very bright, inquisitive kid, and she loves a big football game, and a dance, and a lot of stuff she ought not to pass over too lightly. So, I owe her a conversation, cuz that’s the mom job.</p>
<p>At this point, I’m just trying to figure out how to say it and what to leave in and what to leave out.</p>
<p>I’m thinking the football games and the dances ought to stay in, though. ;)</p>
<p>At the very least, she should have other options on the table because, as was posted above, gaining admission to the CIA is very tough and shouldn’t be considered a sure bet.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>I can laugh about it now but when it was spread around town where one of mine was off to college, everyone from the grocery clerk to the pediatrician asked - wow, can you believe this is how he turned out?</p>
<p>I believe parents shouldn’t dictate where the kids go, but do have the right to insist on kids applying to a few places the parents pick. And insisting they go to admitted students days. So Cornell would probably be on my list - if I were you.</p>
<p>good luck!!!</p>
<p>1moremom beat me to the punch. The replies have heavily advocating college and then CIA … it sure seems to me CIA and then college is also a very acceptable path. If this was my kid I would absolutely prefer they go to college first but it’s not my life it is my kid’s life. What if they want to be cook, try to make in the music industry, be a scuba instructor, etc? Life does not follow the same path for all people … maybe this student is one destined for a different path.</p>
<p>I felt compelled to answer because of the response from the OP explaining how her experience in a kitchen was “the problem” … I read that response very differently. Here’s what I read
- The student had experience in this area
- Loved the experience
- Was drawn to the kitchen
- Showed initiative and confidence to move beyond job responsibilities to check out her area of interest
- Apparently has a talent to match this interest
- Found a great female role model (as a female student)
- The great role model seems potential in the student, took her under her wing, and is actively mentoring the student</p>
<p>OK, I can’t not imagine a better set-up to give an 18-19 year old to pursue a passion. I only can hope my kids find a passion, are given an opportunity to pursue their passion, and find someone on the inside who takes them under their wing to help them get started … geez she hit the trifecta.</p>
<p>I certainly would have a conversation about options … but if my kid still wanted to go for it now … I’d be on her side 100%.</p>
<p>There are other schools where she can get some training while getting the college experience. The one I’m most familiar with is this one: [Conrad</a> N. Hilton College of Hotel and Restaurant Management](<a href=“http://www.hrm.uh.edu/]Conrad”>http://www.hrm.uh.edu/)</p>
<p>When I say “get it” I mean wanting to work in the industry. The work is grueling, the hours are long, it’s hard to take a week off or schedule family time. But, on a busy Saturday night when everything is going right (or not), it can be a real adrenaline rush and very rewarding work.</p>
<p>To increase your chances of a good job, you need to go to the best school possible. It’s true we can name a few top chefs, names in the media, who went to this program or that. Or, a few grand restaurants that a handlful of some school’s grads ended up at. But, my advice is aim for the top schools. A few names (known chefs)or a few kids well-placed wouldn’t be enough for me. Many kids end up in lesser restaurants, working on the line, or in feed-crowds environments. </p>
<p>And, culinary is not restaurant or hotel management. Each time this culinary school/wannabe a chef topic comes up, suggestions veer toward hotel mgt. Different animal. Good luck. It’s a tough job, long hours- but for those who love it and have a knack for it, it’s satisfying.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>thank you. I actually really appreciate what you and 3togo are saying.</p>
<p>Another school that offers both a Culinary Arts certificate program (founded by Julia Child and Jacques Pepin, no less) is Boston University as well as Master’s degree in Gastronomy. </p>
<p>
[Boston</a> University Metropolitan College Programs in Food, Wine & the Arts](<a href=“http://www.bu.edu/foodandwine/]Boston”>Boston University Metropolitan College Programs in Food, Wine & the Arts)</p>
<p>Has D considered taking a gap year and working full-time before she starts a program? (While working during school, as someone suggested earlier, sounds like a fine idea, the opportunities in many college towns are limited and combining the two lifestyles is very challenging.) That might give her a clearer idea if this is really what she wants.</p>
<p>For some reason, I’m very excited for your dd!</p>
<p>I was just about to post the BU link - glad I went through all of the posts. The BU program has one-semester certificate programs for about $13,400. How about doing that and then going for a degree?</p>
<p>It might be worth contacting the regular university program to see if she could take a few courses at their Metropolitan College while in a full-time day program.</p>
<p>Another anecdote that sounds like your situation: A friend’s son was passionate about cooking from the time he was old enough to use a knife. He worked in a small restaurant kitchen all through high school and had a great chef/owner mentor. His dad nearly died when he decided to go to the CIA. A few months after school started, his dad was beaming with pride because he realized his son truly belonged there and had never been happier. This guy graduated several years ago and has been quite successful. If your D has a gift, this might be the route she should take. </p>
<p>We visited the CIA because my son (about to graduate from college) is considering going there. We talked to a student who is finishing up the two-year program, has a good job offer, and plans to finish a B.A. in business while working. That’s another route people have mentioned.</p>
<p>If she really likes chemistry, maybe she might pursue something in food chem? S2 LOVES to cook and really gets into the science of flavors.</p>
<p>He mentioned to the former IB coordinator at his HS once that he might go to culinary school, and she said, “what a waste of an IB degree.” Phooey. S2 was home last week and when he wasn’t pulling carpet and hauling furniture for me, he was cooking up a storm.</p>
<p>I would not be surprised if he goes that route down the road, though he knows from work experience that the hours are long and the work tough – no matter how much one loves to cook. From articles I’ve read over the years, a number of chefs came from other careers.</p>
<p>There is an attorney in the DC area who I’ve seen mentioned in the WaPo a couple of times who quit the legal field and now has a successful business making artisanal sausage. </p>
<p>There is another CC poster (and I am blanking on her name, sorry) whose S is looking at going to culinary school after he graduates from college. Has been working in the field for a while.</p>
<p>ETA: Geezermom! You are the one I was thinking of! Glad you found this thread!</p>
<p>I know two young women from our community who went to J&W, and were home within a year. They were not happy with the program, but I don’t know the specifics.</p>