To be honest, I never had any issue with family or friends ‘on the other side’ until the current administration. We’d have our differences of opinion on various policy issues, general policy, but for the past two years, things are very different. I can’t imagine how anyone can’t see and/or understand that. The lack of morality, compassion, empathy, the demonization of various groups, and the lies that occur on a daily basis, well, that’s just too much to take. I don’t want anyone in my life that is going to agree with all that. The negativity and hatefulness is more than I can bear.
@ucbalumnus I’m not sure what you are referring to, but I’m sure it would go against the CC rules to discuss. IF you can’t hold someone else’s opinion and think about it, that’s fine. But I’m a huge proponent of understanding every argument. Don’t have to agree but it’s likely that every argument even the mysterious one you are thinking about has someone on the other side who thinks differently and has a moral reason ( in their mind) for it. Morals aren’t fixed.
And I believe politics was always nasty, it’s just that now people say online what they used to say only in their homes. And we have rejected discourse as a form of thinking and replaced it with pseudo-facts which you can find in many posts on CC. There’s less interest in other views and more interest in negativity for sure.
For every political point I can make, there are 175 odd million people who will agree with me and 175 million who won’t. The nation is almost equally divided. That’s why the arguments are so white hot intense. It’s not just Thanksgiving dinner, it’s the future of where we want to go as a nation and how we are going to get there.
@alwaysamom --Smile and nodding here…
And to think this started as a Thanksgiving dinner conversation! Guess we know how it would turn out if we all got together!
Dessert anyone? I do key lime pie!
@gouf78 No thanks, I think I’m full and we have a long drive ahead of us. Thanks so much. 
There are many millions of people who could easily make the case that these things are overwhelming on both sides of the spectrum, it’s just a matter of what you look for and with whom you choose to identify yourself.
Politics has always been nasty and hateful. And there have always been bigots, boors, and self-righteous pontificators. Which is why discussions of politics and religion are banned on this site and at many family gatherings.
Policy discussions can be interesting and enlightening, but not everyone understands what one is, or how to participate.
@Happytimes2001 – Here’s a go box. I make the BEST key lime pie!
And a side of homemade cranberry sauce…
I don’t know. Maybe not well. I suspect there are a lot of lump supporters in this crowd. I judge lump supporters very harshly and don’t know if I could possibly be polite.
@gouf78 Thanks. Key lime is my favorite. Happy Thanksgiving.
I understand some other people’s opinions that certain people should not be allowed to exist, or should be second-class citizens, because of characteristics that they cannot change. But I do not agree with those opinions.
Still smiling and nodding…
But it’s Thanksgiving! I’m thankful we have each other to bounce ideas off of on so many levels. Even if they differ.
I’ve learned all sorts of great stuff from people I’ve never met and it’s been great. I personally love to hear from people who don’t think as I do.
How 'bout you?
Had a family dinner last weekend where my beloved SIL and Bro are presumed to be on “the other side.” We carefully tip toe around it. Then my bro volunteered that he registered to vote for the first time in years. We all held our breath. Then he stated he wasn’t on our side but he was closer than he’s ever been – and in a different place than at the election. Brought a tear to my eye. But we all immediately resumed tip-toeing. I remind my teens (who identify with my politics) that smart people whom we love very much often don’t agree on this – so it cannot be as clear as I think it is. I say the same as to religion.
Things that are mere political preferences or opinions for some can literally be life and death for others. She indicated that this was one of the latter.
The failure to recognize this is a failure of imagination and empathy, an inability to look outside your own little bubble.
@zoosermom , was that a mashed potato or gravy reference? Because if it is I want to eat at your house.
@TempeMom
“smart people who we love very much often don’t agree on this – so it cannot be as clear as I think it is”
I love it. You acknowledge both that they are smart and that you love them in spite of these disagreements. I love that example for our children.
That is GRACE - we all need it and we all need to give it to each other.
As a member of either political party, we don’t agree with every single aspect of the platform. At least I can’t imagine that anyone could. So perhaps we do agree on some issues but disagree on others.
Both! Come any time!
I am blessed to have in my family, professional life and friend group people who identify as the “other” side from me. These folks, to a person, embody all of the good things that their identity should speak to, and they enrich my life for their wisdom and example. We can and do eat together, discuss together, and disagree together because they are always open to opinions and experiences of other people. Which is not to say that they change their minds – mostly they don’t and I don’t, but when you can listen respectfully and speak with care of your listeners’ feelings, then people can coexist peacefully, rather than shooting up sports teams on the “other” side and taking collateral damage that might be on your own
Politics is life and death for some of us. I truly envy those for whom its not. Like my in laws. I sincerely would never wish this on anyone.
Thank your lucky stars it wasn’t you that hit the unlucky genetic jackpot.
If anyone wants me to explain further, happy to do so in private messages. Or you can just take me at my word about my own life.
@zoosermom OH, It sounds like you have a great vibe in addition to various foodstuffs.
I have learned so much, from so many, over the years. It’s not about changing minds to me, it’s about hearing how other people came to hold their opinions and how they have formed a framework for their lives.