<p>How long have you and your bf been dating sue??</p>
<p>My H of 25 yrs is 4.5 yrs younger than I. First and only marriage for both of us. There is something to be said for a younger man 
And I trust him completely. He is a great guy.</p>
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<p>I think what is necessary to make a reconciliation work are: 1) the couple still has to love one another and 2) there has to be a clean break with the old lifestyle/girlfriends. Even then, heāll have to earn his way back to being trusted.</p>
<p>One of the biggest problems in these situations is when the cheater canāt make a clean break. If he has a child with the girlfriend and has to deal with her all the time concerning the child, thatās going to make reconciling with the wife problematic. Also, if you canāt make a clean emotional break (see Mark Sanford and his āsoulmateā), that will doom any reconciliation with the wife.</p>
<p>i wonder if TW believes that he loves his wife? </p>
<p>what do you think about the phone message he left?</p>
<p>did he not want to get caught or did he not want to see her hurt?</p>
<p>is it a bigger problem that there are multiple affairs or would it be less of a problem if just one affair?</p>
<p>ellemenopeā¦i agreeā¦the clean break thing is what would be neededā¦</p>
<p>is it sexual addiction? that was mentioned on the tv last night. do you think that would be a big red flag to the sponsors?</p>
<p>I have not read all of these posts, but I just condorās. I think that he just did not want to get caught!! If he cared about her feelings, IMO, he would not have cheated repetitively. He is clearly more focused on his needs, than her feelings, IMO. I should add āif all or most of these stories are trueā. We never heard his side of the story. Since he is keeping this all private, I assume at least some of these stories, if not most, are true.</p>
<p>Iāve always thought it was difficult to understand the nature of any romantic relationship. For one thing, we all might as well write a novel about this with as much imagination as we are bringing to some very scant information. Sometimes we think the volume of times we hear something has a relation to how much we actually know. Then, in any marriage, no matter how close anyone else might be to one of the spouses, we still donāt really have any idea of what it is like when they are alone together. FWIW.</p>
<p>Probably, the basic bottom line is that famous or not, marriage requires a certain amount of committment to the other person. Can someone like Tiger manage this? I do not know. <a href=āhttp://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/06/magazine/06marriage-t.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1&em[/url]ā>http://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/06/magazine/06marriage-t.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1&em</a></p>
<p>weāve been a couple since April of this year. But I first met him 6+ years ago when I had him do plumbing work on my house (literally found his number in the local paper). Weād be in contact now and then over the years but never never āhooked upā. heās been so burned by women that he told me several years ago he was done with us. At ~60 he wasnāt looking for another relationship. His last real girlfriend is also the mother of his 11 yo daughter (born out of wedlock). He would have married her too but she wanted the kid and his money, not him. I tell him that for the first time in his life heās in a serious relationship by CHOICE not necessity (got married twice because of pregnant GF). I will NOT be bearing him any children! weāre both fixed and if I got pregnant we would need to have a talk with GOD.</p>
<p>tmz is reporting that a 4th mistress has lawyered upā¦</p>
<p>is it significant that these reported activities are bar (alcohol) related?</p>
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<p>According to this woman, the affair started in 2004 (the year he got married) and went on for two yearsā¦</p>
<p>He sure could have saved a few bucks if heād never gotten married. Sounds like that marriage was a farce from the beginning and really only a financial contract/arrangement established for image-related reasons.</p>
<p>We now see why Tiger has guarded his privacy so much.</p>
<p>āLiving with someone day in day out when you no longer love them, have been humiliated by them and can no longer trust them, especially when the whole world knows about it will be impossibly difficult.ā</p>
<p>They have a lot of houses. She doesnāt have to live with him at all. They could negotiate a deal in which she discretely goes her way, and he does the same, and they meet each other for public functions. This could go on for a few years, thus salvaging his image for those naive enough to believe in this stuff, and then they could divorce and he could move on to marry another woman so he can keep up his image of being a good, family man.</p>
<p>Given his womanizing, and what appears to be his narcissism, Iām seriously doubting that he has ever been that involved with the kids though he may threaten to fight for the kids in order to keep her married to him for a few more years to help with his image. The kids also are very young, too young to be affected by the implications of their momās remaining married to a proven serial cheater.</p>
<p>āis it sexual addiction? that was mentioned on the tv last night. do you think that would be a big red flag to the sponsors?ā</p>
<p>I doubt it. Sounds like narcissism to me. Sexual addicts tend to have sex with virtually anyone. Tiger seems to have been much more selective.</p>
<p>I wonder how old she was when she married him? I wonder if she even imagined this stuff. I mean, at our age, itās easy to sayā¦etcā¦But, for a young girl? I feel sad for her. I seriously doubt this is what she wanted.</p>
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<p>True, but how does the money thing figure in?</p>
<p>It ends up being a lie.</p>
<p>Btw Sue, Congratulations. I love ānew love.ā
Nice to spend the holidays with someone you care about.</p>
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<p>This is an over simplification. Sexual addiction is more related to problems with intimacy and whether sex is experienced as a compulsion. It is not measured by numbers of sexual partners, but whether engaging in the activity interferes with other relationships, health, work and life in general - just as one doesnāt have to drink every day to be an alcoholic. It can be defined by the compulsion to watch porn for example. Continuing to engage in the behavior in the face of negative consequences and pursuing multiple partners - even without sex - can be a part of it. It can also involve the addict promising himself and others that it wonāt happen again but then being unable to resist the compulsion, as with alcohol and drugs.</p>
<p>There are many psychologists and psychiatrists who donāt believe it is a real disorder. Clearly it is difficult to discern the difference between sexual addition and promiscuity.</p>
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<p>We can make inferences based on his reported behavior, but thatās all they areā¦</p>
<p>We donāt know these people. How can we really say what these two people felt for each other when they married? We donāt know if she loved him or married him for the money/fame, we donāt know what she knew about his womanizing, we donāt know if she is hurting right now or simply embarassed to have something she knew about made public. WE JUST DONāT KNOW for sure.</p>
<p>Some of the people posting here are acting like theyāve got the inside track on total strangersā feelings. Itās interesting to speculate, but the bottom line is that we know a little bit about the actions of Tiger Woods, his wife, and the alleged mistresses, but almost nothing about the hearts and minds of the people involved.</p>
<p>Iām late to this thread, but it strikes me that the behavior of Tiger Woods is no different than that of many other professional athletes. The major differences are that a) he is a golfer, and golfers project a different image than other athletes b) he has taken such great care to project this squeaky clean image and c) heās TIGER WOODS, for gosh sakes.</p>
<p>In addition, personality-wise, I donāt think heās fundamentally different than Michael Jordan, Lance Armstrong or the other small handful of super-elite athletes (Michael Phelps may be different, but he appears to have lived in a bubble all of his life). Youāve almost got to have nacisisstic tendencies to get there.</p>
<p>Finally, why should anybody be surprised that Tiger is at heart a real jerk? Anyone paid attention to his behavior on the golf course (loud cursing, club throwing, etc)ābehavior that would loudly condemned if engaged in by anyone else. Instead, we get something like this from the commentators, āwell, its not good, but itās just Tiger being Tiger. Now letās get back to kissing his feet (or higher).ā</p>
<p>Post# 616-
Well said.</p>
<p>i think we need to have a discussion of binge drinking and risky behaviors (multiple mistresses). what triggers the drinking and the risky behaviors? is this a case of self-medicating with alcohol? whatās the underlying cause? anxiety? depression?</p>
<p>whatās next to come out in the news ? are there children fathered outside of the marriage? </p>
<p>this is a fascinating news story because he has had a squeaky clean imageā¦</p>
<p>does the story continue to have legs because of the parade of new women coming forth?</p>
<p>do you think Jon G is enjoying a little respite from the tabloids now?</p>
<p>There was some stuff on drugs too - Ambien to be specific.</p>