<p>“black light this essay. it might scare you.”</p>
<p>I just have to bring this back it’s so funny.</p>
<p>“This essay is so good, I didn’t have to write it”</p>
<p>“This essay was not written by (Insert your name here)”</p>
<p>“I’m so awesome because my SAT score has 2-digits.”</p>
<p>“Howe Eye wun da Nasionull Spellin B”</p>
<p>“Oh Snap!”
“Why I’m going to BXR you.”
“Glue-All: Multi-Purpose Glue.”</p>
<p>Budweiser is my co-pilot</p>
<p>“I know where you live. . .”</p>
<p>“Why I am no longer a Page at Washington D.C”</p>
<p>“Me, My Science Teacher, and Our Son: The Story of an Unexpected Family”</p>
<p>“my SAT score qualifies me for “handicapped” parking spaces”</p>
<p>“My Struggles With Adversity: Our FAmily Business Folded When Daddy’s Ladder Broke!”</p>
<p>“My Second Language: Turkey Calling”</p>
<p>“The Time My Mama Started a Fistfight at My Football Game”</p>
<p>“The Community Service I Did in Jail”</p>
<p>My Class Voted Me “Most Likely to Return Fire”</p>
<p>“Overcoming My Embarrassment When My Voice Changed in Third Grade”</p>
<p>“I Have My Diploma…from DUI SChool”</p>
<p>“I Was Captain of My High School Burping Team”</p>
<p>Before reading this, know that I am staring at you right now… Yes, at this exact moment. No, not at the window, that’s too cliche. Look around that lady with the purple dress. Yes, closer, closer… To the right. Bingo. Now if you make an attempt to move or notify the authorities, I will have to hurt you. First, go to the trash can and throw my essay away, then start the papers for my acceptance into your university. DON’T LOOK AT ME. Don’t acknowledge my existence. Whether I see the acceptance letter or not, we will see each other soon. I like your sweater. You have some spinach in your teeth.</p>
<p>“How I overcame my heroin addiction”</p>
<p>“How I screwed your wife”</p>
<p>That was the best I ever heard arvandm!!</p>
<p>“How to break an Oreo into perfect halves”</p>
<p>“How to ‘smack that’”</p>
<p>“Give me your money”</p>
<p>“I smoke cocain. It means I’m rich”</p>
<p>“When the telephone rings dont pick it up. It’s probably my mom”"</p>
<p>“How to seduce your hot mom”</p>
<p>“How to become gay”</p>
<p>“I’m a minority. I’m half-black, half-white, and half-asian.”</p>
<p>“My life long struggle with prostitutes: why they want to get in my pants”</p>
<p>“How watching porn changed my life”</p>
<p>“The day i was raped by a woman: the report the police didnt hear”</p>
<p>“This paper is laced with a poison that you are now infected with by touching it. If you dont accept me you wont get the cure. Good Luck.”</p>
<p>(a couple of those were a little vulgar lol)</p>
<p>“My mom made me apply. Please reject me.”</p>
<p>Depends on whether you like or hate the school.</p>
<p>“Ass hair”
<a href=“Trance.nu - It's time to say goodbye”>Trance.nu - It's time to say goodbye;
it’s very funny and can be one of the worst 1 if it was written as essay</p>
<p>^best one yet</p>
<p>“Why I touch little boys”</p>
<p>Wonder if I can get accepted to a Catholic school like Notre Dame or Georgetown or BC with this essay ;)</p>
<p>“My struggles against BO: Why my friends don’t come near me, or rather, the REAL reason I don’t have any friends.”</p>
<p>“I love Sesame Street. And how dare you call me immature! WAH!!”</p>
<p>“I can braid my nosehairs.”</p>
<p>“I wrote the Kamasutra. No, REALLY!”</p>