I’m thrilled for your daughter!! And, it goes without saying, for you!!!
Now, you can breathe again. And start to plan it all!
No, I think he’s second guessing the schools he’s been accepted to. It’s incredibly rare in my school to have a kid who isn’t going to college-- as in it happens every 6 or 7 years. Mom had me writing a scholarship letter, so he’s not planning a gap year. My guess is that he suddenly has interest in a school that he hadn’t thought of before, and is applying there now.
I am planning to chat with him today, to see whether I need to give his College Placement counselor a heads up.
Great choice. I was rooting for it from the start of this thread because of the good experience my son had there.
Be aware that the entire freshman class drops off their stuff at the dorms on move-in day and then nags their parents into taking them to the nearby IKEA to buy vast quantities of stuff they don’t really need and don’t have space for. It’s really hard to control yourself in IKEA.
Glad you feel some relief.
I might add that you may have some more mountains (of emotion or uncertainty) to cross between now and fall. If the decision was that difficult she may still doubt. Please don’t let this be all on her shoulders. I happen to disagree with the “the decision is all yours” mentality. At age 17 or 18 while the opportunity to go out and grow, explore and learn on your own is a fantastic one - it is also a BIG one. Most kids still want and need some guidance. Someone to talk to, be frustrated with, express doubts with - as well as to celebrate the opportunities. Let her know that you are available - by text OR in person to be a sounding board for decisions, frustrations - as well as excitement.
Congrats to your D and the whole family! Great choice.
Again, thank you ALL!!
@abasket - the other way was not working for us; talking or chatting just resulted in heaping amounts of frustration and annoyance toward me - in fact, last night she told me point blank that I was pestering her - she had to come to this decision by herself. FWIW - the snob in me is not exactly thrilled, I’d have much preferred one of the other options, but, it is what it is…
She was very courageous - it’s hard for teens to make a decision they know will disappoint their mother.
In addition, you don’t specify but I bet she got into a scholars or honors group, be thrilled about it.
And the price will allow you to help her in whatever she needs so that she isn’t hindered in any opportunity that comes her way :).
Tell her you can’t wait to visit her when she’s on her fully paid so semester in Costa Rica or Paris or Beijing. 
Boast about the awesome merit scholarship and/or the special program she got into. Ask if she’ll be interested in season tickets for football. 
Find ways to invest your enthusiasm.
Congratulations on making a decision. I don’t think I would have let my kid to decide by herself, unless she was paying for it.
The anti-snob aspect of a state university can actually be part of the education you get there.
My son who attended UMD made this clear to me (actually, scolded me) in the middle of his freshman year when I asked whether he and his friends liked to eat in the restaurants near the university. He said something like, “Mom, this is a state university. Some people have money and some don’t. There are people here who have to eat every meal in the dining hall. They can’t afford to pay for dinner somewhere else when their dining hall dinner is already paid for. So we don’t go off campus to eat.”
This came from a guy who grew up in an upper-middle-class suburb where pretty much everybody had enough money for small treats like restaurant meals (and who had plenty of spending money himself). In just a few months at UMD, he had learned to appreciate the socioeconomic variety among his classmates and conduct himself accordingly.
UMD has some top 10 programs. Even regular admission has become very competitive. Be proud of her.
@busyparent is right. Even for in-state students, it has become amazingly difficult to get into UMD. You would be astonished at the qualifications of some of the students who don’t get in and have to settle for a less interesting school located in a less exciting place.
@Marian - and that, right there, is my D to a ‘T’! Independent school educated from K-12 and surrounded by affluence all of her life, she does NOT want her college experience to be a repeat of HS. As it is, she spends almost nothing and asks for even less; her single largest expense is a Starbucks or a taco once or twice a week. All her friends drive flashy cars, and while she has a license, she doesn’t want her own car; if she needs to get somewhere, she uses one of ours. She’s just a low key kid; very humble and does not like fuss or fanfare. I remember when she got her amazing SAT results, we were so excited (shame on us!) and wanted to celebrate, she was having none of it; the same when she passed her driving test, NHS etc., no fuss, no fanfare, no bragging - so what she doesn’t do, we have to make up for, LOL!
I have to get my head in the UMS game and embrace her decision.
You allowed your daughter to pick her school and her pick was a great school! Get the UMD mom sticker for the car and be proud
@Nurse001 - LOL! I know - I’ll get there, I promise!
"“Mom, this is a state university. Some people have money and some don’t. There are people here who have to eat every meal in the dining hall. They can’t afford to pay for dinner somewhere else when their dining hall dinner is already paid for. So we don’t go off campus to eat.”
Wonderful that your son learned this and expressed it so well. I think any university or college can provide that learning experience for students, though. Plenty of socio-economic diversity at private schools as well. One of the best things about going to college is how much you learn outside of the classroom being exposed to others from different backgrounds than your own.
@momo2x2018, UMD is our flagship. We know many students with stellar numbers who turned down MIT, Duke, Emory, Cornell, JHU, UChicago, etc. for the merit money and Honors program at UMD. They went on to said places for grad school. If your D got into Honors or Scholars, that will help her make the campus more intimate. What is her intended major?
Another advantage of UMD is that they are generous with AP/IB credit, so a student can double major and graduate in four years without much difficulty.
Most of the kids who graduated from HS at the same time as my kids did NOT get into UMD. A number of them got into other OOS flagships (VT, Penn State, Ohio State, WVU, UF) but the bar to getting into UMD is rather high these days.
Kudos to your D for knowing her mind and acting on it. That’s a huge survival skill for college right there.
My sons went to very diverse public high schools and were a bit stunned at the overall socioeconomic status of their colleges. At our house, they could pick the college of their choice, but that decision had financial consequences (i.e., no car, they are on their own for grad school, they had to take Staffords and get a PT job, etc.). UMD would have enabled us to offer many more opportunities.
So, relax and enjoy that your mature daughter has chosen the best place for HER, it’s financially reasonable for your family, and that you may be able to help with overseas travel or other experiences that would not have been possible at a different school.
Congrats on decision being made. My youngest is graduating from UMD/the Smith School in a couple of weeks, and he has been very happy with UMD. He got multiple very good job offers last fall, using school resources, and I don’t think he would change a thing. And several years ago, my older son applied to UMD, plus a few too 40 schools. UMD engineering was actually the hardest to get into (this is class of 2012 - and he chose elsewhere). I suggest you get behind UMD and recognize it is a very good school/option.
Just read this thread today and I would have voted for UMCP too. It is an awesome school with so much activity going on. She is going to have an amazing four years.
Oy! D just received a call from one of her WL (not a top choice); talk about throwing a wrench!!! She told her AO that she would discuss with her mom :))
DID she want to go there over UMD in the first place?