Parents of the HS Class of 2025 (Part 2)

Back from the orientation stuff at Clemson. Overall, I think I’m going to call the experience a draw. The sessions didn’t really provide us any new information, but that’s probably because I’m more than a little obsessive about reading everything I can and doing all the random virtual info sessions and scouring the website. And I get that that’s me being a little Bit Much, and probably not normal. On the second day they had breakouts by college, and S25 is in the College of Art, Architecture, and Construction Management. It’s a small school so this would be, I thought, a good opportunity to really learn more about the program. It started well with an introduction from the new Dean, then one of their student services team gave some highlights of how each of the different departments have their own advisor leads within the student services group, and what they do etc. Unfortunately, that’s where it stopped being college specific. They had the two students who were the assigned orientation ambassadors for the incoming freshmen come up and ask them questions, but it was the same generic “ask a student a question” presentation that we saw at: (1) prospective student visit; (2) admitted student day; (3) the day before at the overarching orientation event. Not specific to the Department, program, or anything else. Then they excused the incoming freshmen to do a scavenger hunt in the building.

(Sidebar: super cool building, lots of awesome art and architecture stuff, S25 enjoyed roaming around. But of three joined buildings with work spaces for processors and students, there was one small hallway, with eight doors, associated with his major. It made it feel really like an afterthought. No workspace for them, no special tools or classroom space. More on this later.)

During the scavenger hunt, one of the admin people from the Department spoke to the parents but it was, again, about general stuff - campus resources to help your student if they are struggling with academics, or mental health. How to, as parents, help them launch. How FERPA works and what information you can and can’t have etc. All useful information, but also all things that we had heard before in the big overarching sessions, and not tied to the specific College. This 2.5 hour block of time was specifically described as an opportunity to learn more about your College and Department, and I felt like it fell down a bit in that regard.

The most specific part of the presentation was when they talked about the study abroad - the architecture and landscape architecture students are required to do a term off campus and the art students are strongly encouraged to do that. So it was interesting to hear about the abroad programs related to those majors. It didn’t happen to be relevant to me, but it hit three of the four majors in the school, so I understand why they did it. That was the last presentation before a 10 minute bathroom and question break, which then led to some families asking specific questions of the reps from their Departments during the break, so some time was available there to ask questions. Unfortunately, the advisor for the Construction Management program was no available, so that was a disappointment, but the Art advisor was there and was willing to answer some questions so I got one question answered (I asked if construction management students can do the study abroad - given they have a very prescribed series of courses, they can’t really do a semester abroad program, but they can do a spring break one week something and maybe a course abroad the summer after freshman year. Beyond freshman year, not really, because they have to get in 800 hours of internship experience, which pretty much is the summers after sophomore and junior year.).

So anyhoo, the day and a half of orientation stuff (this isn’t the only orientation, there are lots of welcome week stuff for students) was maybe not worth the time off of work and drive. I don’t feel like we learned a whole lot, and it is a REALLY long drive. But it was good to see the campus again, S25 was able to familiarize himself with it, and I think that gives him some confidence going in to the start of the year. Although the space wasn’t open to us, we were able to drive to the off-site location where many of the upper level construction management courses are held and see that. (That’s why there’s so little space in the Department buildings - those are really only offices for the professors. They use random lecture halls on campus for the entry level class, many courses are business school classes which are in their building, and the upper level and hands on courses are in the offsite construction yard. They have space for classroom study out there too, but it’s like a small warehouse, so nothing fancy. I am nervous about this aspect of things, because S25 doesn’t have a car, and getting there will be a challenge. When he picked Clemson, his most expensive school, the tradeoff was that we didn’t have the funds available to help him purchase a car. So we’ll see if he can manage to save enough from his summer job this summer and next to buy one before sophomore year starts.)

It’s a beautiful school, it still feels like the right fit for him, he still is happy and excited to be attending. But a down and back in three days is exhausting and for so little new intel, I think we both were thinking it might have been better to stay home and get the extra two days of work and sleep. We got home late last night and we’re both kind of wiped out today.

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I’m reaching WAY back for this one, but if you have a date night coming up, I could use a new Flail Mower for my tractor. You don’t need to remember why you ordered it.

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So we have the Sleepyhead mattress topper and the Woozoo fan. That means we’re done with dorm shopping, right? :rofl::rofl:

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Don’t forget four T-shirts and a guitar case.

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My S22 comes home today from his summer job in Pittsburgh! It wasn’t quite the summer he was hoping for (the job was more project management, and less engineering. He’s good at project management, but doesn’t really want to do that, he wants to design.) but it was a solid experience. We get him for a week in the house, then all four of us are going to the beach for 3.5 days, home for an evening, then driving to Clemson for move in. Two weeks from today we move my youngest into his dorm, and two weeks from tomorrow we drive away. I’m pretending I’m not going to have a hard time with all of this.

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D25’s school does not release dorm assignments until 3 weeks before move in, which is expected to be early August. Why you ask? Because there is a lucrative black market of dorm subletting that occurs because some of the dorms are so much nicer and cost about the same as the older dorms. D25 confirmed that the Dorm Swap 2025 subreddit has appeared. Apparently, the kids who get the nicest dorms who really don’t care where they sleep will sell their space to Goldilocks kids who will then pay a premium for the room. I think the logistics would be difficult to pull off, but she assures me it is a thing. I told her I would keep the rest of her college funds for a vacation for myself if she got booted out of college for subletting.

We have a spreadsheet and Ikea, Costco, and a few things on a Pottery Barn cart. Her spreadsheet is a thing. I asked her what are chip clips and she said, “they are plastic clips used to close a bag of chips to keep them fresh.” I told her we don’t have chip clips (we use clothespins at home for the rare event that we buy a bag of chips) and that if she wanted to buy a full bag of chips as a college freshman with her own money, she could figure it out or bring a few of my clothespins. Chip clips! My goodness, the gadgets. I did let her buy packing cubes, even though I don’t even use them.

So…much…stuff…

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Although the chip clips with magnets can live on the fridge or side of a file cabinet and hold important pieces of paper. Because who opens a bag of chips in a communal space and has any left over???

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I send binder clips. They can be used for their original purpose and to close chip bags. Double duty!

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I have to concur on the chip clips - no need to send and like @Pandamom2 I might toss a few binder clips in the bag just in case which can be used for both.

But - I have to say I recently discovered packing cubes and I love them. For me, forget my child, me. I used them on our trip to Greece and it really helped me both stay organized and compress my stuff down smaller. It did not make logical sense to me (why put things in pre-formed rectangle shapes, won’t that waste room in my bag?) and yet somehow I packed for 10 days in another country in ONE CARRYON. (minus an extra pair of sneakers, which fit in my son’s second carryon.) I am not typically a light packer, although I will re-wear things. But still. I’ve decided the packing cubes are somehow a miracle of time-space continuum.

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We have the Sleepyhead mattress topper too. And sheets, towels, a comforter, shower caddy, shower shoes, and moving bags. I don’t know what else to buy until we see the actual dorm layout. May just wait until we get there…

S25 and one of his two roommates followed each other on Instagram. Have they actually messaged to introduce themselves? OF COURSE NOT. And when I prodded S25 said, “We’ll meet at move in.” I could throttle him, but it’s not like either of the roommates have reached out to him. I guess we’ll just play it by ear…

Hope everyone has a great weekend!

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Desk lamp. That’s the only other room decor type thing to buy. In case he needs to be working while roommate is sleeping so they need to turn the overhead light off. You can 100% buy once you get there, but you may prefer to find something on Amazon (my older kid wanted it to be able to charge his earbuds, to have a relatively small base, and to be sort of shaped like a folding arm. Why he cared, I don’t know, but this was one of the weird things he cared about.)

In terms of other stuff, I mean, you could all coupon crazy and hit CVS almost every day so you can use One More Coupon to buy tylenol, bandaids, neosporin, allergy meds, whatever else for the med kit One Thing At A Painful Time. Uh, not that I know anyone that did that. (Me. I did that. Because I’m losing my mind and obsessing about weird things.)

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Great suggestions! I want to get a fan or two (clip on for bed and maybe a desk fan), extension cords and chargers, maybe a husband (?) pillow, and I definitely want to make a medicine/first aid kit. Thanks for the suggestions!

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I laugh, but in part because one of the must have purchases, higher priority than a room fan or anything like that, for C23 was a hardshell guitar case, and for C25 has been a hardshell banjo case.

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This is probably obvious, but because I hadn’t made the mental distinction until I happened to read it this morning - you may want to get cords that, although long, are also surge protectors and not just regular extension cords. S25’s school doesn’t allow extension cords, but does allow surge protectors that have a long cord.

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And double-check your kids’ schools’ requirements! Hofstra has that same requirement, and apparently also does sweeps and confiscates any surge protectors that don’t have a legible UL tag or sticker.

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I love reading all the updates re: room assignments, cords/surge protectors, etc, orientations, decorations, etc! Keep them coming! With that said, I feel like we are about five steps behind y’all. Until D25 gets a dorm assignment (which I believe come out around Labor Day!) I refuse to buy anything beyond the Woozoo fan and a mattress topper. Dorm rooms are not huge at her school, and as long as she can make it through a week without something, anything she needs can be ordered–or picked up at a Target/Costco farther away from the school, where they won’t be sold out. (You can all feel free to remind me of this statement if I start buying a ton of stuff in September.) I feel like even in the best of circumstances, she and her roommate will have a challenging time fitting things in. We’ll see where she gets placed. And feel free to keep sending your words of wisdom as you take your kids to school, as we don’t head to southern CA until mid-September!

All of this feels so far away, though, as we’ve been to Mexico this past week, and explored and ate our way through Mexico City. The best part of the trip was spending time together as a family…and having limited internet access so everyone was pretty present throughout the trip. And today, after going to bed at 1am, my kids are re-living their (younger) childhood playing Portal Knights and we’re planning on a board game as a family tonight. I’m well aware that many people can’t afford to travel abroad, let alone have a couple of extra days to transition back to normal life, so I’m so grateful for these opportunities and memories made.

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Embarrassing to admit but my husband just informed me he is renting a small trailer to get her stuff out of state. We only have my tiguan and with the 3 of us in the car he doesnt think there will be enough space. D25 is in a suite with bedroom, living room, and bathroom she shares with only 1 roommate and it looks like we are bringing the bulk of shared space items.

We have for the bedroom: typical dorm bed stuff (mattress pad, cover, 2 head pillows, etc), body pillow and padded dog bed for a headboard, narrow bedside table, 2 under bed 3 drawer storage units, desk hutch, square ottoman to get into raised bed, dry erase calendar, and a few wall decor items. Hard plastic rolling hamper. Plus all her clothes, shoes, and desk items.
For the shared area: This is where the trunk space isn’t enough. We have a over the toilet storage unit I got at the thrift store, large garbage can, 2 huge bean bag type chairs, a small rolling table type unit, a standing coat rack, and a standing fan.

Its too much but yet, I know I will pack it all. I am the problem.

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It’s getting real now. Paid for fall semester today! 20 days until move in.

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I have been gone awhile - I was sick, then trips to visit various family members.

Countdown is on! Less than 2 weeks until we leave (AHHHH!). We are doing a little side trip on way to drop off (weird with all their stuff, I know).

I honestly don’t think it has hit any of us how soon it is! Kid had some work drama with their summer job (now sorted) which took a lot of mental energy, along with our trips.

I think their schedule is in their online portal, but they refuse to check. (I am sooo curious, but alas they seem not to be).

Still no roommate contact - lol.

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Hey y’all, I’ve been dipping in occasionally this summer but haven’t had much to report or contribute. S25 has been having an old-school Gen X-style summer (that’s the spin I’m putting on it, anyway) – he never managed to find a job (late start + haphazard application strategy probably didn’t do him any favors) and has basically been slacking. Most of his friends are either better self-starters or were programmed by their parents and are traveling around Europe, doing NOLS courses and summer classes and camps, etc. He also starts school a month later than many of his friends. It’s a lot of sleeping late, watching movies on his laptop, etc. Hard as a parent to watch and not intervene more. Once a week or so I drag him out on a hike or micro-adventure but otherwise he’s hanging out, occasionally with friends but often alone. College hasn’t seemed top of mind.

He did manage to score a dorm room (a triple in the engineering LLC at UW) and has the names of his roommates. They haven’t contacted each other but he is optimistically buying very large posters of various bands (Nirvana, Black Sabbath, Pink Floyd) to put up on the walls. That should be an interesting conversation…

He has two days of online orientation this week and just this weekend he’s started researching classes (mostly just amazed by all the languages they offer at UW, and weighing whether he should stick with his plan to learn German so that he can do an engineering semester abroad in Germany or Switzerland – or learn something like Farsi, which is his late grandfather’s native tongue.) He did have a meeting with disability support services that I need to follow up on and he found out that his CA-based psychiatrist is able to prescribe meds in WA State, which means he can keep seeing her on breaks and won’t have to find a new psychiatrist. I am relieved to have one less thing to worry about on that front.

On the shopping front, I’ve procured sheets (dark gray, because he is not going to wash them very often), a duvet cover (although I hear it’s going to be roasting in the dorms), a mattress topper (but not the one y’all have – feeling like I missed the memo on that one), a laundry backpack, and a Woozoo fan (yay Costco!) I also bought him new giant bell-bottom jeans and a belt. We will get him new shoes (I’m thinking new running shoes + either lightweight waterproof hiking boots or Blunnies) and a waterproof shell. We have tons of towels for our small family and I’m not sending this kid off to school with brand new ones when his MO is to leave them in a crumpled wad in the bathroom (even when he hangs things up they somehow mildew!) We’ll get lamps/rug/extension cords/power strips etc. once we get there and see what the space looks like. I think we can rent a fridge/microwave for the room, which makes more sense to me than trying to sort out summer storage. I don’t know how much he’s going to try to bring – he might bring his guitar, his commuter bike, potentially a road bike if we can somehow store it in his dorm room (but we might see if he can borrow one from his uncle before committing to keeping a bike at school. Not sure if the cycling team will be his cup of tea.) He has stereo components, including funky old speakers that look like organ pipes – but we might want to wait on something like that until he actually knows his roommates. My hunch is that most music will be heard through headphones.

I am nervous about this launch, y’all. This kid is a good soul but he’s such a space cadet. Last night, for example, his dad put some dough out to proof and asked him to stick it in the fridge before he went to bed. To help him remember, Pop stuck left the bread on the floor outside the door to the office where S25 was playing video games. I reminded him and he was kind of salty about it. And yet…when he went to bed, he opened the door to the office, stepped over/around the bowl of bread dough on the floor without seeing it, and went to bed, leaving it there. Oops…

I hear from a lot of people that boys are late to the party when it comes to sorting themselves out. I want to believe this could be true but it’s going to have to be one hell of a steep learning curve if he’s going to survive freshman year. :anxious_face_with_sweat:

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