Actually, @doschicos, the Thacher head of school hosts a weekly party for the kids 
Thacher isnāt the only school. Rectory night on Saturdayās is an SPS tradition as well but you get only poppy seed cake and other such treats. No weed or jello shots. 
What percentage of SPS students attend each week?
@buuzn03 I hardly ever worried about my daughter when she was in high school and lived at home. She was a responsible kid and never gave me any reason to worry. A lot of her friends were the same, they went to some parties but no craziness to speak of. Now she is away in college I worry. I worry about my boarding school kid too. When they arenāt at home you have no control.
Agreed. Friends at the public school have kids in their grade who drink on a weekly basis (despite strict school rules against it) and whose parents are aware of the behavior. At least at BS a kid who is found drinking on campus is pretty much getting in trouble, I donāt have to worry about their parents being idiots who donāt care about a clear case of teen alcoholism.
@417WHB I am not worried about my child and her irresponsibility. At all. I simply feel that at home they are exposed to more risky situations than they are at boarding school between driving here, there and yonder or ending up surrounded by bad activities at the movie theater or sleeping over at a friendās house whose older brother decides to engage in activity that may put her in danger. As someone else said, different parents/adults have different rules which could have an effect on what my child is exposed to, also.
At BS, if my kid goes off campus, he goes with a faculty member whose job is on the line should something happen to the kids under his supervision. Almost all late night activities are on campus.
You may worry more with your kids away at school, but I for one, know what my town is like and know the risks at bay every time we leave the houseā¦so I know I would worry more with them being at HS here. And that has nothing at all to do with my childrenās character.
OK - everyone ābreatheā !! Luckily, we have found our BS experience to be very safe and I believe most of parents on here have prepared our kids to make good decisionsā¦and to be around friends that also make safe choices. Better to be prepared and to discuss difficult issues/concerns BEFORE your kiddo heads off to BSā¦or any high school. The thing that also scares me is Uber and taxi rides - which many kids take for travel, sports, weekends. That is another subject @ Safety.
A couple of years ago, I found an old article from the 1960ās about the amount of pot use at PEA. If I can find it, I will share the link. For now, here is an interesting 2017 article about the use of pot at Harvard.
https://www.thecrimson.com/article/2017/3/8/weed-at-harvard/
Related to this subject: Here is an important documentary that many schools are now showing to students and/or parents: āIf They Had Knownā. Please let us know if you have seen it and what you think.
Sorry to be naive, but what how is aderall used illegally? Why do kids take it? Does it make them feel high? Or does it increase focus or something else?
They take it to help them do better at school, not to party with it.
@Happytimes2001: This article may be a bit old, but the issue isnāt:
https://www.nytimes.com/2012/06/10/education/seeking-academic-edge-teenagers-abuse-stimulants.html
@GoatMama Might be able to give a more current read but when my kids were there, Iād say a majority would spend at least part of the night there. Theyād flit in and out, spending time there and other parts of the evening at some of the other activities on campus on a Saturday night.
@Choatiemom I canāt get behind the firewall. But will try to look it up. I had no idea that was even an issue.
@Happytimes2001: If you canāt reach the NYT article, you might start with this thread and the links shared there:
For those of us of a certain age, this is the current version of speed which was widely used in my day to cram or write that paper that should have been started weeks ago.)
Helps you stay awake and be focused.
@wow, thanks for the insight.
@gardenstategal - I freaked out a little when I learned that. There was a Frontline or a similar show about it a couple years ago, iirc.
The notion that (a) speed (amphetamines) is knowingly prescribed as treatment for adhd is shocking enough, knowing its addictive qualities and all, and (b) parents arenāt told that is what adderall is, and Ā© kids are pushed into adhd diagnoses by some parents just to get the prescription just so they can get a competitive edge is terrifying. On so many levels. And then on top of it, kids give it to their friends, with no concept- because how bad can it be if it is prescribed by a doctor and my mom really wanted me to take it?
Not to say there arenāt legit prescriptions for it, an no offense to parents who legit seek treatment for their kids. It is mind-blowing how many parents seek out an adhd diagnosis though, to get a leg up with accommodations and meds, without being informed of the risks. I refuse to believe parents would do this knowingly. But I do believe big pharma would. A la opiod addiction. Same exact thing, really. Just better hidden and more delayed.
The impact of this phenomenon 10 years from now may be really really bad.
Just for a little insight, adderall use and abuse is not a new trend in boarding schools. Both adderall and Ritalin were widely used and abused when I was at BS 25 years ago. Kids would stockpile their meds over holidays and give/sell them to their friends to help them study/write papers. It is also a drug that is used as a āparty drugā, similar to cocaine. While I never saw it used in that way at BS, I did see it out of BS and wouldnāt be surprised to hear that high school kids (BS or not) use it to āpartyā. It is most definitely something to be aware of and to talk to your children about regardless of what school they go to.
@CateCAParent I think blaming parents here is misguided. I have no personal experience, but have several friends who fought hard not to put their kids (mostly boys) on medication but the schools demanded it because the kid was too much of a distraction. The request for evaluation and medication comes usually from the school at least in the early years, because the schools are not set up to deal with kids who cannot focus and are a distraction. Or sometimes from the family because the kid is a train wreck when they come home. But the early diagnoses are not to get adderall, and a lot of parents have misgivings about having their kids take medication but schools force their hand.
This to me is different from many UMC/wealthy people seeking the diagnosis later on to give their kids an edge. They donāt do it to get adderall subscription, but rather to get extra time for all the testing. Some donāt take adderall at all, some might but often only before the high stake tests. Since the diagnosis has a range and a lot of kids (and adults) have some ADHD tendencies/focus issues if you really want the diagnosis and have some resources it is not hard to get there. Which is a shame but very different from schools shoving down the evaluations as early as K.
This really is a thing and shameful parenting. What message is one sending to their children engaging in such farces?