@Cory1058 , you’ve got this. Any kind of rejection can be challenging, and it is hard not to be stressed when your child is stressed! But Michigan is a huge, huge win, and the wins should be celebrated and focused on way more than the rejections.
(Btw, I am in the northeast too and the location is a bummer for college apps - huge density of above average kids. I tried to impress on my D24 that while she and her friends were special, there were thousands and thousands of thousands of other really special kids, all over the world, whose accomplishments exceeded theirs. It is an impossible cognitive task to imagine what is beyond your scope/view)
I agree completely. The process of applying to universities in the US is just way too stressful for teenagers. There are also way too many high school students in the US being treated for stress-related illnesses.
I originally came from Canada which seems like a somewhat similar (although less populous) country but in which the process is a lot less stressful – if you are one of the top students in your high school, then you just decide where you want to go, apply there, and attend in the fall. I did know a few people in high school who only applied to McGill (in-province) because they knew they would get accepted and they wanted to go there. In contrast this system in the US is too unpredictable.
However, your child can get a very strong education at any one of a few hundred universities. Your son is already accepted to a few excellent universities. One reason to focus on the acceptances that he already has is that this might reduce the stress a bit.
I sort of hinted at this above but might want to say it more clearly. One daughter has a major which is very similar to one of your son’s intended majors. She did the same thing (although she was looking at graduate programs). She came up with a list that overlapped your son’s list by a very large amount. Two smart kids looked at the same information, looking for the same thing, and came up with the same list. This to me suggests that they both probably got it right. Also, this suggests that your son does have a good reason for each school that he applied to. This is likely to have come through in multiple of his essays, or in interviews, or both. This might help his chances for admissions to his reach schools. This is one example of how “unpredictable” and “random” are not quite the same thing (admissions is “unpredictable”, but is not actually “random”).
But the bottom line is the same. Your son already has a few great universities to choose from to decide where to attend in September. My guess is that he is likely to have a small number of additional options. I cannot predict which ones these might be.
@Cory1058 , you’ve got this! I had recounted in different threads that the CCs at our school said that in many - maybe most - cases, the parents take all of this harder than their kids. Especially kids who have enjoyed mostly success as they’ve moved through high school.
Your son has, and is likely to have more, great acceptances. The "average excellent " students, as they are called here, are real stand-outs in their current environments AND are very numerous. Most high schools have several. The world needs every one of them, and nothing that got them to this point will go away at any college they attend.
A friend’s D, val at her large, high-achieving HS, with a number of impressive ECs (including nationals at her unrecruitable sport) was certain she’d have at least one Ivy acceptance (where she was a legacy.) Nope, didn’t happen. She’ll be starting her residency as an MD this summer. Which is also to say that smart, ambitious kids will thrive.
Agree with everyone here that you can use this time to be an ear for your son and to help him develop some tools for dealing with stress as he is likely to put himself into stressful situations in future as well. He’s in a situation now in which there are no bad outcomes.
Just to add: received a tufts interview and is scheduled for Wednesday! Not sure if this means anything (I know Duke and Yale pre screen for interviews), but still exciting regardless. This will be his 9th interview. If anything, good prep for interviews in his future
I am sorry if I added to your stress. I guess I was answering as I would of liked to be answered. With a sense of you might want to prepare your son. Cushion the landing. Be pleasantly surprised with the couple of reach acceptances he will get. I can also encourage you to try and help your son with coping/stress management skills now while he is still at home. Let him set the pace. Because here is what a lot of parents do not talk about. If he does get into the top tier Ivies he is in for a real eye awakening also. After being top of his class and getting into everything you have to get used to not being able to get into clubs. Clubs have 3 rounds of interviews. So I agree with everyone saying try to remain calm and support him.
Update after receiving a few decisions this past week:
Northeastern: accepted + 5k / year
WashU: waitlisted
UChicago: rejected (made dumb mistake with LOCI so this was completely expected + the sub 1% RD)
UCSD: accepted
Just yesterday Villanova notified us about being a finalist for the full ride and we got an invite to the presidential scholarship weekend!!
Overall happy with how things have been going. Any thoughts on these decisions and how they may affect your predictions / if you have seen any trends with getting into x school also getting into y… etc.
Waitlisted from Notre Dame. Do you guys think there’s any chance for the remaining schools?
• Harvard University
• Stanford University
• Yale University
• Columbia University
• University of Pennysivania
• Duke University
• Vanderbilt Universiry
• Dartmouth College
• Northwestern University
• Johns Hopkins University
• Cornell University
• University of California-Los Angeles
• Tufts University
• Georgetown University
• Boston University
• University of California-Berkely
Aren’t you the one in at Michigan, maybe a full ride at Nova and a full ride at Stony Brook? And one school waits lists you and you already are losing hope? You already one the lottery.
You could get shut out - or you might get in a couple.
Some of these schools are very different - I worry that you are putting a US News rank ahead of fit.
I think you have a list of 20 schools and one WL you and you are losing hope - you’re putting waaaay too much pressure on the process.
All schools are independent. And they decide independently.
That’s why - we see kids in at MIT but not BU or in at Berkeley but not San Diego State. The other day someone was WL at Skidmore yet got into much higher rank.
Every school is different - and they will evaluate you independently.
Relax - you’ve already won. Deep breaths. You’ll know soon enough - but you put forth your best effort, and now it’s out of your control - but again, you’ve already won.
Yes, I think that there is still a chance for any school that you have not yet heard back from. Also, of course your son is already in at some very good schools.
I have seen several cases of students being turned down by one reach school, and accepted to a different reach school, sometimes including an acceptance to a higher ranked reach school. These schools are looking for students who are a good fit for them, and they will vary in terms of what they consider to be good fit. For students who are obviously highly qualified and are applying to reach schools, a rejection at one school does not tell you anything at all about what result is likely to come from a different reach school.
As such, no news is just that, no news.
Best wishes, and congratulations on the great acceptances already in.
To people outside of the northeast, UM is stronger than many of the schools on this list. Only two schools in New England beat UM (Harvard and MIT). I understand there is the traditional Public Ivy list, but UM, UVA and Cal are the best public schools in the country.
I’m rooting for you and sticking with my original prediction for 3 out of the 19. (Wash U, Tufts and BU were my predictions a few weeks ago)
The most recent “Your college bound kid” podcast episode predicted more waitlist action this year, so Wash U may turn to an acceptance as may some of the other waitlist schools.
I think DadOfJerseyGirl has a great point. Is your son feeling the same way? If so it is time to celebrate his wins! UMich is amazing! A full ride can give you freedom to go anywhere for Med school. I said this before, I think it is time to start thinking about how to celebrate what your son has achieved and I would say admission to 2-3 on the remaining list and start to prepare that this may not have the outcome you had wished for through no lack of work or accomplishment. He needs to know you are proud of what he had done and are excited about where he is going!
Two things can coexist. He is happy about UMich but also wants to get into some of his other reach schools that he thinks might be a better fit. Definitely a bit worried after some of these waitlists as am I, but hopefully a few schools will pull through
for the Villanova award. Let us know how your son does!